Oh my goodness! This is so funny! This website tracks currently playing movies and lets you know when is the best time to “run pee”. Sadly, for those of us with weak bladders, this tool may actually be worth using!

Not only does it tell you when to run to the bathroom, there is a box that you can “unscramble” to see what you will miss if you stay gone a bit too long.

What do you think? Cool idea, or just weird?

OK, every year, on Memorial Day weekend a bunch of AA (alcoholics anonymous) bikers come in and have a big pig roast and festivities at the fairgrounds. I’ve never gone, but they have a dance and it’s always a “festive” atmosphere. Lol The guy who started it (Woody, who I do know) moved to Hawaii several years ago, but comes back every year to host the roast.

So….yesterday Paige brings me the phone and this “colorful” sounding couple from Idaho are on it asking if I have Woody’s (they can’t remember his last name) phone number because they have some questions about the pig roast. Best as I can tell, they picked me out of the book because my last name is Wood, which is close to Woody. Rofl

I give them Woody’s last name, but say he won’t be in the book because he doesn’t live here anymore. I tell them I’ll take their number, call around and find someone who knows something about it, and have them give them a call. (I couldn’t immediately think of anyone involved, but knew I could easily find out who to get in touch with – it’s a tiny town) They say thanks, I call a friend, get in touch w/one of the organizers who says he’ll call them. All is done.

Well….this morning I notice there’s a message on my answering machine. When I play it, I hear that it is Paige answering the phone when they first called. They asked if she was “an adult over the age of 16”. She says “no” so they ask for her mom and Paige says she’ll get me.

Here’s the funny part. While they’re waiting for me to answer and unaware that they’re on the machine, the woman says, “She ain’t gonna talk to you. They won’t know nuthin’ about it. Sounds like they’re homeschoolers. She’s gonna hang up on you!”

ROFL Cracked me up!! Glad I was nice to them!!

On a nicer note…I had to take the Scouts to be in the Dayton parade today. As I was waiting at the end to meet the boys I was watching this family of kids and the older boy (maybe 12ish) was being WAY to nice to his younger siblings to be “normal”. (Giving them his candy, holding theirs in his shirt pocket and continually allowing them to paw through it looking for a piece, etc) I know all the homeschoolers in the area, but finally couldn’t help myself. After I complimented the boy I asked the mom if they homeschool. One of the younger kids turns around and says, “We homeschool and we LIKE it!” rofl I said, “So do we!” Turns out they were visiting from out of town. It’s just amazing how OBVIOUS it can be when you run into another homeschooling family.

Hehe. This is cute. I checked my blog and it was rated:

Go to Ultrasound technician schools

The funny thing is that my partner's blog is rated PG-13!! Just wait until I tell her. She has apparently used the words; "abortion",  "gun  and poop. I, on the other hand, only used "dead".  Hehe. This probably shouldn't amuse me as much as it does.

Poor Brayden had a but and spent most of the morning lying on the couch and being sick in a bucket. Poor kid! Fortunately, he's a pretty good sport. At one point he told me, "My head hurts really bad and I think I have one of those migrations, again."

He meant a migraine. :-)

Out of the blue, my ds came in the room and asked me if Indiana Jones was a "psycheologist". I finally understood that he meant archeologist, got the giggles, and couldn't stop.

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 My youngest was complaining about being bored. As I cuddled him I commented that, "If you're bored that means your brain isn't working like it should be."

 In all serious, he replied, "Yeah. That's because I keep hitting my head on tables & stuff."

Along the lines of my earlier post (but sadly, this one actually happened to me today)...

GAH!!! So Skylar comes home from Scouts (after I'd been there for a meeting) and we have the following conversaton:

Skylar: "They asked what was the longest we'd gone without a bath and one kid said 'two days' and I thought that was really weird."

Me: "Why?"

Skylar: "Cuz I've gone like six days or ten days or something like that?"

Me? "Did you say that?"

Skylar: "Yes"

Me: dead silence.

Ok - the kid has NOT gone six or ten days!! Please tell me they will all realize that and not think were some abusive, neglectful homeschooling wierdos. ACK!!!

The fact that I showed up right after their meeting for the parent meeting makes me even more embarassed - not sure why, though. I can just imagine them all wondering "does he really go weeks without a bath?"

I got this in an email and found it too good (and true!) not to share.

A cute Mom's Day story....   So, we had this great 10 year old cat named Jack
who just recently died.  Jack was a great cat and the kids would carry him
around and sit on him and nothing ever bothered him.  He used to hang out and
nap all day long on this mat in our bathroom.

Well we have 3 kids and at the time of this story they were 4 years old, 3 years
old and 1 year old.  The middle one is Eli.  Eli really loves chapstick.  LOVES
it.  He kept asking to use my chapstick and then losing it.  So finally one day
I showed him where in the bathroom I keep my chapstick and how he could use it
whenever he wanted to but he needed to put it right back in the drawer when he
was done.

Last year on Mother's Day, we were having the typical rush around and try to get
ready for Church with everyone crying and carrying on.  M y two boys are fighting
over the toy in the cereal box.  I am trying to nurse my little one at the same
time I am putting on my make-up.  Everything is a mess and everyone has long
forgotten that this is a wonderful day to honor me and the amazing job that is
motherhood.  

We finally have the older one and the baby loaded in the car and I am looking
for Eli.  I have searched everywhere and I finally round the corner to go into
the bathroom.  And there was Eli.  He was applying my chapstick very carefully
to Jack's . . . rear end.  Eli looked right into my eyes and said "chapped."  
Now if you have a cat, you know that he is right--their little butts do look
pretty chapped.  And, frankly, Jack didn't seem to mind.

And the only question to really ask at that point was whether it was the FIRST
time Eli had done that to the cat's behind or the hundredth.

And THAT is my favorite Mo ther's Day moment ever because it reminds us that no
matter how hard we try to civilize these glorious little creatures, there will
always be that day when you realize they've been using your chapstick on the
cat's butt.

My boss was lamenting her "moron-ness" (yes, her word) earlier today and I decided I'd let her in on the fact  that I occasionally have major problems myself as evidenced clearly by Saturday's escapade. Since I took the time to type the whole thing out, I figured I might as well post it here as well. Maybe we can all share and see who wins the "Queen of Moron-ness" award. Gena tried to pull Jen into the whole thing as well, but she quickly set us straight. She's the goody-goody non-moron. Gena thought that was me but she was wrong! I totally qualify for the moron-pool....

So....I'm getting my freebies on Sat. (ds and dh are bringing more so I'm not done yet! ) and, apparently, got so over-excited that I lost my brain. My cell phone would NOT work. It was totally weird. Wouldn't turn on at all. And I'd just used it the afternoon before. I kept pushing the button and - nothing! Decided the battery must be totally dead so I plug it into the car charger. Still nothing. Great! My relatively new phone is not working. So...I'm frustrated, but can't be sidetracked from my FREEBIES. I do decide I'll stop in at the phone store when I'm done. (I live out of town and won't be back for a week or so, otherwise) I finally head to the phone place at 3:30 to find they close at 3 on Sat. Bummer. WalMart is across the street so I go in there, thinking I'll find a pay phone to check in at home and try and call my son who is in town and could be forced to go through Albertson's and get me more free stuff. Bwahaha!

No one picks up either phone so I decide to go drool over the ipods since I'm there. I run into a friend and lament my phone problem. He suggests taking the battery out and putting it back in. I try that. No luck. Now, this was probably a "God thing" because the sale shirts that I got for $3 for my dh were right there! Anyway, I head out, do the battery thing again. Decide to try the charger again "just cuz." Well, as I pull out the little cord on the charger, I notice that the charger came out enough not to be "engaged" (the little light went off). So I plug the phone in and push the charger all the way in. It says "charging"!!! I'm delighted.

 So, I have it plugged into the charger and try to call home. Still won't work. I think, "that's weird, I thought you could use them if they were plugged in." Decide maybe it does that if you run the battery ALL the way down or something. Continue on with my errands, try the phone again. Still no luck. Shortly, the phone says,"charging complete". (Hmmm...seems like it charged pretty quickly for being totally dead) I Try to use the phone again and it STILL won't work. I've now been worrying over this phone all day. I make my last store trip, sit in my van and the "lightbulb" comes on! I'VE BEEN PUSHING THE WRONG BUTTON!!! All day long! There is NOTHING wrong with the phone - never has been. Battery wasn't even dead. When you open it, you push the red button to turn it on. That's stupid. Should be the green button (which is what I was pushing). Still....I've had the phone for a couple of months, use it pretty regularly and have NEVER had this problem before. Kind of scary, actually. I mean, what does your brain do? Just take a temporary leave, or what??

So, count me in on the Moron club. I can probably even be president. At least the stupid phone store was closed so I didn't look like a total moron in public. Sheesh!

So, anyone wanna try to beat that?