A few weeks ago, I wrote about the struggle I was having with managing my little ones while schooling the older ones. I am really thankful for all the encouragement I received. The very next day, I put into practice the good advice I received and enjoyed immediate rewards. Being the pessimist that I am (or as I and my fellow pessimists like to say, realist), I have waited to post about our success in case it was short lived. Well, it has now been about two weeks and I am so happy to report that our system is going great.
The Problem:
My desire was to have some quiet time in which to focus on reading with "A" my 5 year old boy. I also wanted to spend time alone with "L" my 3-year-old son so I could work with him without older brother answering for him. But "E" my toddler boy of 16 months felt like all time was his and was making it quite difficult.
The Solution:
First, I made a schedule including all of the things that I (when alone and could think) felt were important to our day. Then, I explained it to the boys. Next, I set up the Pack-n-play in our family room so that it is now a permanent piece of furniture. I choose a toy to go into the Pack-n-play and an activity to be put on a blanket on the floor of the room. I got out my timer and explained to everyone what would happen.
1. 16 month old would go into the Pac-n-play for some independent time.
2. 3 year old would be on the blanket for activity time.
3. 5 year old would be on the couch with me.
This happens for 15 minutes and when the timer goes off, the 3 and 5 year old switch places. For the older boys, this went really smoothly right from day one. At first I thought the 15 minutes would just be a beginning time, but I have been amazed at how much we can accomplish in that amount of time when it is uninterrupted!
For the toddler however, there was a learning curve. The first time I put him into the Pac-n-play he cried letting me know I had really disappointed him. But, I simply explained to him that I loved him enough to teach him that he is not the center of the world. He gave up his appeals after a very short time and began playing with the toys I had put in with him. The second day, he cried a little less and much less convincingly. By the third day and every day since he is happy to see what I have picked out for him that day. Oh, and I forgot to mention that before we even start this process I give time to the little guy thats just for him!
The Benefits:
1. My few school goals are now being accomplished with regularity.
2. I feel we have made strides in character training in that each boy has the opportunity to consider the needs of his brother above his own (when it is not his turn with me).
3. I dont know if anyone elses kids are like this, but my kids rarely if ever play with toys. They do mostly dramatic play, in other words they are too busy being a car to play with one. So this exercise has allowed me to focus their play on some of those really great educational toys/activities that weve bought that they have never really played with before. And they really like it!
4. Structure. Structure. Structure! Once again I find that the more structure I have, the better it is for all of us! The boys are happy to have this school time and I am too. No longer do I go throughout the day feeling guilty about what we are not doing but now I know the important things will happen at the right time.
5. I LOVE that I know that each one has a time to be on my lap doing what best suits them.
6. We are still all together. I had tried doing school during room time and found that keeping all of us in the same room made it easier for each child to stay content. So for now, thats what works for us.
I also began an official table time. A practices his writing, L is working on letter pages and E has various things to play with that he gets only during this time (or he does art
