Posted in Homeschooling General
Creating a Love for Learning in Your
Part I of III January 2005 Donna Reish
I recently had a “kick-off the school year lunch” with my mini-support group, unit study co-op group, field trip group, and accountability group---all the same five fellow homeschooling moms. One creative and affirming mother had the idea that since we are starting a new school year, we should go around the table and encourage one another in our home schooling strengths. After we bawled our way through lunch and dessert and the Kleenexes were all discarded, there was a common encouraging thread towards me: They felt that I had encouraged them and modeled for them how to create a love for learning in my children and in me. After our emotional lunch (and a quick stop at the scrapbooking store—we recovered from our emotional outburst enough to shop!), I contemplated how I influenced these moms in that way. I considered some of the comments they made. And then I asked myself, How can I spread a love for learning to home schoolers everywhere? In this article, I would like to share over a dozen key strategies that Ray and I have discovered to help our children love to learn—strategies that have caused our children to get out their school books on a Saturday night simply because they want to, strategies that make learning in our family a joy instead of a drudgery, and strategies that have helped us build fond (and exciting!) home school memories. I. Make Learning a Big Part of Your Family Model a love for learning Your children want to be just like you! They might not say it. They might say just the opposite at times, but the fact is, they want to be just like Mom and Dad. Thus, the beginning of teaching our children any skill is to model that skill for them. I remember in teacher’s college when the buzzword (or acronym, actually) was SSR---Sustained Silent Reading. The goal of SSR was to set aside ten or fifteen minutes each school day to have every student reading. The superior teachers were the ones who didn’t grade papers or file their nails during SSR; they read too. The idea was that if the teacher were modeling reading for her students, they would follow her example. The same is true for home schooling parents with modeling a love for learning. Do you force-feed your students what they need to learn but remain stagnant in your learning? Do you act as though you already “know it all,” so there is nothing else for you to learn? Do you seek out information about topics you are interested in learning more about? We recently took a family vacation to Disney World. I carried (well, whoever carried the backpack actually carried) an eight hundred page volume entitled, The Unofficial Guide to Disney World. I pulled it out as we traveled to each park, reading aloud about the best viewing spots for the afternoon parade, the worst hamburgers in the place, and the longest time one has to wait during mid-morning to ride “ Learn with your children Throughout the years, we have made purposeful attempts to learn with our children—especially if the topic was important to the child. There is nothing that builds relationship more than to have someone truly interested in what you are interested in. Now, this hasn’t always been easy (or fun). Many years ago, I took sewing lessons with the girls for a couple of years. It was like having my finger nails pulled out with pliers. Pure torture. However, sewing was important to Kayla—and she went on (along with Cami—definitely not with me!) to quilt quite a bit, make “dress up” garments for her brothers every year, and hand make other quilted gifts. When Cami first started attending deaf church this year, Ray enrolled in sign language with her, so they could share it together—and so Ray could at least greet Cami’s friends from deaf church. We have taken many community type classes with the children—internet use, town history, county history, etc. Obviously, we haven’t learned everything our children have learned, but these opportunities have given us avenues for spending time with the kids—and showing them that we value what they value. We are always encouraged by the parents who come to speech and debate classes with their kids on occasion. Sometimes a parent will come the entire semester and learn right along with their kids. Not long ago, a mother and father came up to us and told us how much they had learned through our speech and debate class. We were surprised as we had not seen these parents in class. They proceeded to tell us that they went over their daughter’s notes and worked on her speeches and debate preparation with her—and learned as much as she had! This input and level of interest had to be an incredible encouragement to a girl who was fearful of taking speech and debate class. Integrate school with chores, service, ministry, and more In other words, do not make “school” a separate entity from your life. “School,” as we know it, is a man-made institution. The New Testament says that children are to be under tutors and managers until the time appointed by their father. Many schools began as a result of a perceived need to teach children the Bible. Certainly no body (governmental or otherwise) was intended to raise our children for us! The “rules” and “guidelines” that we devise for our home schools are often the result of what we see in “real schools.” Of course, many of these are based on solid research and experience of how children learn, etc. But more often than not, the “school ways” are devised in order to provide “mass education.” We should only copy what are truly superior ways to learn. How many children do you know who go to school (public or private) and truly love school or love learning? We don’t want that to happen in our home schools! The Old Testament is filled with admonition after admonition to teach our children all the time. It tells us to teach our children when we get up, when we walk, when we sit, and when we lie down. That certainly doesn’t mean to “have school” day and night! I believe that learning takes place all of the time---life skills from chores; social skills and much more from service; Bible, character, and godliness from ministry---and of course, academics from bookwork. When everything we do is looked at as “learning” and “valuable,” it doesn’t matter if a student is completing a math page, helping an elderly neighbor, or reading to little sister. It is all learning; it is all valuable; it is all needed. I realized that I had done too good of a job incorporating school in our lives and our lives into school when ten years ago, my oldest daughter (Kayla, now eighteen and faster than lightening at household and kitchen tasks!) was a dawdler. At five o’clock one evening, she was still sitting at her little table doing a math page when I suggested that if she would work faster on everything, she wouldn’t still be sitting there doing her math book so late in the day. She smiled her cheeriest smile at me, shrugged her shoulders with arms out, and exclaimed: “I like school. I like chores. And I like to play. It doesn’t matter how fast I go or when I’m done because I love it all!” I cringe when I hear of academic students who are too busy “doing school” to minister or provide services to others or selfish young people who are too consumed with their own interests to reach out to those in need. A well-rounded student is one who balances his time among “academic” pursuits, ministry and service opportunities, hobbies, family activities, spiritual growth opportunities, and fun. Any imbalance in these areas—even in “over-academics”-- makes a student lacking in something—and certainly not a model of a student who loves to learn and loves home schooling. When we train our sons and daughters to put making a meal for a new mother right up there in their “to do list” with their English, we are integrating school with life and life with school. School all the time One of the downfalls of "traditional homeschooling" is the idea that we have a school in our home. In that regard, we would learn only in the same way the schools do (mass education, workbooks, etc.) and during the same hours that schools do. The best thing we can do for our children in this area is to create a love for learning and not confine learning to "school." I can still remember when my first born was eight years old and discovered that other children did not do school on Saturdays. To him, every day was a learning day; why would you skip learning on Saturdays? Even worse though, was when my children found out that other home schoolers do not have to do school in the summer. They thought everyone did everything just like we do, so when they discovered that, they started begging for more “free time”! I overcame the summer dilemma by making summer school our “fun” school---letting them choose the things they wanted to study in the summer and modifying our schedule so that there wasn’t as much bookwork in the summer, but learning still took place. We called these “summer school goals,” and my older children still remember these “put a sticker in the blank for each chapter you read” or “put a sticker in the blank for each 15 minutes of math drill” charts with fondness. My little kids now actually beg to “do summer school goals” like the older kids did. By “not confining learning only to school,” I do not mean that everyone has to school on Saturdays and all summer long. Nor do I mean that you have to “have school” beyond Basically, try to make your lifestyle such a spiritually and academically-enriched lifestyle that you avoid non-learning times as much as possible. Of course, you’ll always just go to Grandma’s for dinner, watch a movie on a Friday night, or clean out the garage on a Saturday afternoon, but make life your school and school your life. This truly causes a love for learning as children are always learning and growing—and school becomes a way of life rather than a time of day. Make learning a family affair Prior to my friends encouraging me in my accomplishments of developing a love for learning in my children, I had never given “teaching my children to love learning” much thought. I love to learn. My husband loves to learn. Learning is such a major part of our lives; I never considered it something that we should “do” or teach our children “to do.” Loving learning is what we do twenty-four/seven. We have an ongoing library list like many families have grocery lists. Dinner conversation often goes like this: “When the next person goes to the library, I need a book about photography. All of my pictures from the park today have shadows.” “Oh, if you’re going, pick the boys up some more Magic School Bus videos.” “While you’re there, could you get me the latest issue of Today’s Christian Woman. I noticed it has Joni on the front of it.” “Add my two items to your list: How to Write Query Letters and Reading Difficulties Handbook.” “Oh, I need that book on creating believable characters in novel writing again.” “I need that book by the president’s speechwriter again for our debate class. You know which one…the one that I paid twice its worth in fines last fall.” And on and on. The next library patron in our family rarely gets to eat dinner. He or she is too busy making out “the library list.” Everyone in our family—from the six-year-old kindergartener to the forty-something-year-old father is constantly learning---and often all learning together. With everyone’s busy schedules and various activities (not to mention age gaps of the children), learning together can be quite the challenge, but it is a challenge that is worth pursuing. We have found that what we learn together as a family stays with the children longer than almost any other learning. I think it is because of the process of this learning together. When you learn something alone, you might read it or hear it, and that might be it. Maybe you will encounter it again soon (a test) or maybe you will not encounter it until it comes up in a movie, book, or conversation some months down the road. When a family learns together, the topic is brought up again immediately---by someone (the larger the family, the more likely that it will be brought up sooner rather than later)—then discussed, dissected, evaluated, debated, and more over and over again. For example, right now a few of our children are studying Shakespeare together. Joshua (our married son) is their teacher. They “go” to his class once a week for ninety minutes, yet the class seems to continue day and night throughout the week. They come in from class discussing it; a movie or book reminds them of it, they are picking up library picture books of Shakespeare; and the whole family has to hear about the plot, the characters, etc.; my nine year old and six year old are even quoting from Shakespeare now---long quotes without missing any of the words! It is like this with anything that two or more of the children are studying together (except for math!). Learning is contagious. Discuss everything Another good way to develop a love for learning in children---and to increase their comprehension skills---is to discuss everything. When discussing reading, language arts, and comprehension with homeschooling moms, I often hear a mom say that her child can read everything, but he does not seem to comprehend what he is reading. Some students can word-call anything put in front of them (much like reading "There's a Wocket in My Pocket"!). In these cases, to say a student can "read anything" simply isn't true. Yes, he can "word call" anything, but if he does not comprehend the words he is calling, the material really isn't "at his reading level"---it is just at his "word call level." Once you have everyone all together (or at least part of your crew), talk. Talk about the importance of picking up after yourselves; how you can use dish soap and water in place of window cleaner when you run out; the number of hours different sized candles burn; how various camera angles make things look like they’re spinning or getting farther away; why you shouldn’t point a toy gun at mother; what the word “acknowledged” means; what to do in an emergency situation, such as a “hazardous waste” in someone’s eye (don’t forget a play demonstration by the twelve year old carting the kicking, screaming, dramatic six year old to the sink); why the Ethiopian eunuch came to Jerusalem; why child-centered parenting results in badly behaved children; who Mom’s favorite teacher was when she was little; what the fruits of the spirit are; how much Spanish someone needs to take in order to be ready to travel to a Spanish-speaking country for ministry; the difference between analogous colors, complimentary colors, and coordinating colors; why you have soup or stew every other night—and when can someone fix something good (i.e. pizza or French fries!); and more (all real conversations in our living room and dining room within the past couple of hours as I was working on this article with everyone eating, cleaning, studying, and talking around me). Again, what does that have to do with love for learning? When children come to a new learning opportunity (or adults do too for that matter), they bring what they already know (the vocabulary, the background of knowledge they have about that subject, any topics they might know about related to that topic, etc.) to the opportunity. The larger the background of experience a child has when he encounters any learning experience, the greater his chances for success in learning the new material. He has more “hooks” from his past learning to hang the new material onto. When the new learning opportunity takes place, the student will gain a little, a moderate, or a large amount of “learning” from it---based on his comprehension of the material. His comprehension of the material, of course, is related to many things---the level of the material presented (if he is unable to even decode the words, he will be unable to comprehend any of it), the student’s background of experience, and the method by which the material is presented (i.e. learning styles). Take my sewing example I mentioned earlier in this series. If today I were to enter an advanced sewing class in which the teacher began discussing how to smock a dress for a little girl—and I have virtually no learning hooks on which to hook that (can’t thread the sewing machine, can’t even turn on the machine, do not know cotton from polyester, etc—I’m telling you, I was a sewing failure!.), very little learning will take place. However, if I had had many sewing experiences (years of sewing classes, sewing at home, reading of sewing books and magazines, attendance at a sewing circle, etc.), I would be immersed in that subject. I would toss sewing terms around much like I do grammatical terms. I would have a large background of experience to bring to that advanced sewing class, I would be much more successful in the class, and more real learning would take place for me. (Well, theoretically speaking, that is!) Obviously, our children cannot have real experiences with everything they will ever learn—any more than we adults can. However, we can discuss things with them as they come up, explaining foreign concepts to them and giving them a large background of experience to bring to their learning opportunities. I have come to the conclusion that this is why my kids love having Kayla for a big sister (besides the fact that she is a great baker!). She increases their comprehension of everything. During her first day at These types of activities will increase our children’s comprehension, which will carry over to all their school subjects and all of life. Comprehension of information is the groundwork for all learning--oral, written, or auditory—and the more our children comprehend, the more they will love learning. Help them see homeschooling as superior When my older kids were very young, and I would get extremely stressed out with five kids nine and under, I would do the unthinkable—threaten to send them to school. When they were really driving me crazy, I would make a “tire rolling” sign and sing, “The wheels on the bus go ‘round and ‘round,” to indicate that if they didn’t straighten up, the big yellow bus was going to come and take them to school. Now, I have since matured quite a bit (!) and no longer threaten the kids with going to school. But I do know that if I had continued in that vein, they would definitely not have the love for learning that they now have. Threatening to quit homeschooling is not a way to build love for and confidence in homeschooling, either. Thankfully, I learned quickly that threatening is not a good way to parent children. I can remember about that same time thinking that I wanted my children to grow up loving homeschooling. I wanted them to see it as a superior way of life—as a means to the goals that God has given us. I wanted them to love our life—and be grateful and happy that their parents followed God in this calling. This is a life-long process that, I believe, has come about by doing many of the things suggested I this article. It has come about by constantly discussing the many benefits of homeschooling. It has come about by their parents openly thanking the Lord (and expressing our joy and gratefulness) for allowing us the opportunity to train our children at home. And it has come about simply because we communicated to our children early on (after the “wheels on the bus” episodes) that we were committed to this way of life—and we were not going to stop just because one of the kids was strong-willed and drove me crazy, or someone had difficulty learning to read, or life would be easier if they went to school. I have noticed a trend in home schoolers: the reason they home school often determines their children’s love for or lack of love for learning. Children from families who home school because they think it is a superior way of learning seem to love learning more than children from families who home school because the other option (public school or private school) is “bad.” Now don’t get me wrong. We home school for a myriad of reasons, but our children know we are in this because it is plain and simply the BEST---all the way around. They also know that we are in it for the long haul, as long as God permits us. Thus, there is no way out. There is nobody else that will pick up the slack in learning for us. There is nothing in the future that will save our children from our laxness. It is all up to us. We are responsible for our children’s education for all of their school years; and once they become a certain age (oh, say, eight years old or so), they are responsible for their learning, too. It is ours and it is theirs. |
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