We finally got a call on Christmas day! We were so excited - it was a newborn, from the hospital. We were out of state at hubby's parents, but they were sure the hospital would wait a couple days, and what CPS worker wants to have to work on Christmas anyhow? Well, today we left the in-laws's early and rushed home to get ready. And then, once we get home, we find out they placed the baby somewhere else already and did not tell us. (This is the second time since we have been waiting that they have found another home after calling us.) Obviously, it was not God's plan for this little one to be in our home, but I am so disappointed and upset right now. I really tried to not get excited, but you know how mommies are...
We're still here. No foster kids. We did get a call for newborn twins about a month ago, but they had already found a home when we called for more information.
We did find out a few reasons we are having a longer wait for a foster child. First, where we live now has a lower population than the large metropolitan area we used to live in. Also, the number of foster children cycles, and we are in a downswing. When we first became licensed, they were in an upswing, and did not have enough foster homes for the foster children. Then, we also found out that the area where we live now, the majority of foster homes work directly with CPS. We use a private agency that contracts with CPS. CPS has a policy that they call their foster homes first, and only if they cannot find a place there will they call the agencies for a placement. That frustrates me. Rather than look for the best place for the child, they play favoritism. We have considered changing to being a direct CPS home, but there are 2 big disadvantages to that: 1. We would lose the support and advocacy (for us and for the foster children) that we have with the private agency. It really is a better situation for the children and foster parents. 2. We would not be able to take special needs children. CPS homes can only take basic children, not any that have any special needs. I used to work with special needs children, and I would love to again. Our home is currently open to special needs children, but since they are such a small portion of the population, of course there are not many calls for them.
Our only option right now is to keep waiting and praying. God knows who and when he wants someone in our home.
Logan's birthday party went well. They were predicting rain, so we did not do the water guns and balloons. He had a car's theme to his party, so we got some little ceramic cars and he kids got to paint them. It seemed to go over really well. Logan had a great time.
The Ugh! is that it is been 2 months with no new foster kids. At the end of August, I checked with our caseworker, and everything was fine, there just had not been any calls for the age we are open for. I called again today. I did not want to be a pain, but I wanted to make sure that there was nothing on our side holding up a placement. Our caseworker checked, and our family was listed as "on hold." - that means they were not calling us! He is supposed to get that changed ASAP. I hope we do get a call soon. Not that I want kids to get removed from their homes, but I want to be able to provide a good home to a child that needs it.
Logan will be turning 4 soon. We're having his party this weekend. It's not on his actual birthday, but the weekend is better, of course. It's supposed to be nice this weekend, so we are thinking about having it outside and letting the kids have a water gun and water balloon fight. I think that would be fun.
Our house needed some work when we bought it. That's why we were able to afford it. So far we have remodeled one room. But, it was a room we were not using at the time anyway, so it was not a big deal. Now, we have begun the process of remodeling the master bedroom, master bath, and closet. Part of the project involves moving the wall between the dining room and our bedroom. The dining room is painfully narrow and we can't even pull the table away from the wall, which obviously limits seating capacity. So, we are moving the wall a few feet so the dining room is more usable for us. So, right now, the dining room, the master bedroom, master bathroom and the closet are all off-limits to kids because of the construction. The kids are eating at the little kid table in the kitchen, and hubby and I eat wherever we can. Also, this affects the foster children we can take. With the pregnancy, I am not supposed to lift over 20 pounds. I don't want to risk getting another baby like Junior - he was almost 30 pounds! And, because we have less bedrooms available, the only place a foster child can go is to share a room with Star. So, we are limiting who we can take for foster children to 1 girl, age 18 months to 3 years. It is a possibility that it could take longer to get a foster child since we are being very specific, but that is all we are able to handle right now with our circumstances.
Junior went to a relative yesterday. CPS told me from the start that his plan was to go to a family member, as soon as they got the homestudy done. Homestudies typically take 30 days. He was here 3 months. Yeah, a few people dropped the ball along the way. We are sad to see him go. He was such a happy baby, and he made a lot of progress while he was here. When he came at 8 months, he could roll around on the floor and sit if you propped him up. When he left at 11 months, he could crawl, babble, make actions for a reaction, pull up to his knees, and get himself into and out of a stable sitting position.
"Stability, stability, stability. They don't have it on the inside so they crave it on the outside."
Quote from Katie Bettendorf on blog post October 30, 2007 Read the Bettendorf's blog here. (Note: I don't agree with all their opinions, but she does give food for thought. )
This made me think of Logan. He seems to need more reassurance and more advance notice of any change or deviation from routine.
We're still here - just busy :)
Junior is still with us. He's a very happy baby. He has the cutest giggle. He's doing well. He's got some delays, so he will be starting Early Childhood Intervention soon.
We're not sure how long he will be here. He has some family who is interested in taking care of him, and they are working through the homestudy process. If they are approved, he will leave pretty soon probably. If they are not approved, I think Junior will be here for a while so his parents can work out what they need to. I hope to know something either way soon, maybe by the end of the month?
The other kids are doing well, too. Star is talking so much more now. DH said tonight it was a mixed blessing. We love to hear her expressing herself, but it means she's growing up. :(
We got an 8 month old boy on Monday, 5/4. He's doing well with us. He's generally a happy baby. He has the cutest smiles and giggles. He sleeps through the night, which is a blessing to us The goal is reunification with his parents, so we don't know how long we will have him. It might be a couple months; it might be more than a year.
Sorry it took me so long to update - when a child first comes it is really crazy with all the paperwork, getting clothes, bottles, caseworker visits, etc.
I am getting discouraged waiting for the next child. I am trusting that God knows who and when. The child that needs our home must still be in his or her current home. That's hard to think about. All I can do it pray for the children in bad situations, and for God to prepare our family.
I am listening to the song "While I'm Waiting. You can listen to it on you tube.
We got a call yesterday. A 6 year old girl with a medical problem. I did some research on the medical problem, and then tried to call my husband. He had accidentally turned his phone off, so it took me 45 minutes to an hour to be able to talk to him. When I called back, the girl had already been placed with someone. So, it was not meant to be. It gave us some motivation, though. We are re-doing one of the bedrooms. It was supposed to be done by February, but everything goes slower than anticipated. It has actually stalled for a while while other projects were tackled. But, this reminded up that we need that bedroom to be finished soon. It is now our top priority project for this weekend.
I heard the block hit Logan's head.
Me: Star, did you hit Logan?
Star: No
Me: Star, did you hit Logan?
Star: No
Me: Star, did the block hit Logan?
Star: Yes
This was a recent conversation at my house:
Charlie: Whose tummy was Daddy in?
Me: Grandma's
Logan: And I was in Grandpa's tummy, right?
Me: No, you were in another mommy's tummy.
Logan: Whose?
Me: I don't know her, but then you came to live with us.
Logan: Yeah! And then I went to Home Depot and was adopted and now I am a (our last name)!
I got my garden in yesterday. Everything is planted, now I'm hoping it will all grow well. I have not had much success before, but I think I have planted too late, and the plants just fried in our heat here. I started pretty small - just a 7 by 3 plot. I am using the square foot gardening method. I planted tomatoes, beans, peppers, cucumbers, and zucchini.
We are officially open for foster kids. Placements are down now. I'm hoping and praying that's because less kids are being abused - wouldn't that be wonderful!! So, we've been open for a almost a month and have not gotten a call yet. The last two times were had an opening, we got a placement the day we were open. So, this is new territory for us. But, I am happy and content with the children we have, and they certainly keep me busy, so I am not unhappy with the wait.
We were talking about Valentine's Day coming up. Charlie said, "Are we going to have a party for Valentine's Day?" I said, "I don't think so." He said, "Well, in the book we got from the library, they had a Valentine's party at school. You always say home is our school. So, we need to have a party at our school!" :lol:
Star is potty trained, at just over 2. We are really happy, of course
We don't know where she got the word, but her word for telling us she needs to go is "maboo." It's really cute.
Today we had a combined birthday party for Star and Charlie. They had a lot of fun. Charlie especially has been counting down the days for about 2 weeks. But, this morning all the kids could sense the excitement and they were literally bouncing off the walls waiting for friends to come. We had a small party. We had invited 2 families, each with 3 kids around the age of our kids, but one family was sick and unable to come. We had a pinata, ate 2 cakes, and opened presents. Star had a strawberry cake, and Charlie requested a chocolate cake with a green transformer. I frosted the cake in green frosting, and Daddy drew a transformer in black decorating icing. Not professional looking, but Charlie was thrilled. Everyone had a great time.
I knew it had been a while since I blogged, but I did not realize it had been 2 months! Things are going well here. We have 3 kids at home now: Star, Logan, and Charlie. No foster kids since October. We took a break because of a trip we took over Christmas. We visited my family for 3 weeks. Taking a foster child out of state requires court permission. Normally, it is not a big deal, but 3 weeks is a long time to be gone, and it's doubtful that a court would have approved it. What do you do then? So, we held off on placements until we got back. Right now, placements are down about 50%, so I don't know when we will get our next foster child. Less placements is hopefully a good thing - hopefully it means less kids are being abused. God knows when the next child will come, and He already has that child in mind. Right now, I am working on loving the kids I have (precious gifts they are!) and working on a schedule. I have a routine for our days, but I am playing around with a more detailed schedule. So, we'll see what happens with that.
We are a family that has opened our home to foster and adoptive children. Follow our journey along the way...
Kids currently in our home:
"Charlie" - boy born in January 04 (bio)
"Logan" - boy born in Oct 05 (adopted)
"Star" - girl born in January 07 (bio)
"Junior" - boy born August 08 (foster)
So far we have remodeled one room. But, it was a room we were not using at the time anyway, so it was not a big deal. Now, we have begun the process of remodeling the master bedroom, master bath, and closet. Part of the project involves moving the wall between the dining room and our bedroom. The dining room is painfully narrow and we can't even pull the table away from the wall, which obviously limits seating capacity. So, we are moving the wall a few feet so the dining room is more usable for us. So, right now, the dining room, the master bedroom, master bathroom and the closet are all off-limits to kids because of the construction. The kids are eating at the little kid table in the kitchen, and hubby and I eat wherever we can. Also, this affects the foster children we can take. With the pregnancy, I am not supposed to lift over 20 pounds. I don't want to risk getting another baby like Junior - he was almost 30 pounds! And, because we have less bedrooms available, the only place a foster child can go is to share a room with Star. So, we are limiting who we can take for foster children to 1 girl, age 18 months to 3 years. It is a possibility that it could take longer to get a foster child since we are being very specific, but that is all we are able to handle right now with our circumstances.
The goal is reunification with his parents, so we don't know how long we will have him. It might be a couple months; it might be more than a year. 