How Fruitful Am I? - Homeschool Blogger

Passionate Housewives Desperate for God

Mon, 21 Jan 2008 18:54:00 -0600

I cannot say enough about how awesome this book it!!!! I would HIGHLY recommend that you get this encouraging book!

More devotional musings

Sat, 14 Jul 2007 06:27:00 -0500

I have really enjoyed this book, (minus a few issues) It has helped me REfocus on what I am working on and striving for.

So here is the quotes out of today's chapter, " Satan's best tactic forus to forget God lies in getting us busy: Get us too busy to worship, to busy to laugh, to busy to enjoy life, too busy to be in His presence, too busy to notice the simple things that scream of the sovereignty of God. That kind of busyness is a sure-fire formula for a life of no joy. Don't let the enemy, or life in general, rob you of the meaning of life---- to love God and enjoy Him forever.
Psalm 55:6-7 "6 So I said, “Oh, that I had wings like a dove!
I would fly away and be at rest.
7 Indeed, I would wander far off,
And remain in the wilderness. Selah " (NKJV)

My THOUGHTS:

I so often feel robbed of JOY. It brought to mind the verse, In Thy presence is FULLNESS of joy. How often, I leave Your presence RUSHING to LIVE and really inside I begin to spiritually die!!! How heartbreaking it must be for You to watch me do "life" without the proper guidence waiting for me to recieve from YOU!

So as King David said in repentance, Psalm 51:12 Restore to me the joy of Your salvation,
And uphold me by Your generous Spirit.

May you do the same for me as well, today and FOREVER!

More thoughts from devotions

Thu, 12 Jul 2007 06:13:00 -0500

Thoughts and rambles from my devotions

"When I have not been sitting at the feet of Jesus, when I have not been in His Word, when I have not gone to Him to refuel and refresh me, I have literally nothing to offer. Jn 15:4 "Remain in me, and I will remain in you. No branch can bear fruit by itself; it must remain in the vine. Neither can you bear fruit unless you remain in me."

The best thing-or make that the only thing- I have going for me is God. Time with Him. The relationship with Him. A love for Him. When He slips out of the picture(because I am running to fast or have failed to priorize my time with Him) or when He diminishes in my life (because I have cut my quiet time with Him down to a mere few minutes a day or nothing at all), I am nothing. And I have nothing to offer anyone else. (Just ask my family!)" Cindi McMenamin

How often do I do this! My heart aches when I realize how often I fail the Lord in my faithless and selfish actions. It is all to often I am "doing" things, (supposedly for His glory) like home-schooling, cleaning, talking with others about Him, that I notice that I am spinning my spiritual wheels and not really resting or growing in Him.

Jan Meyers, "The fruit of our love affair [with God] is our beauty, it is not something we can manufacture, manipulate, or control."

Cindi McMenamin, " How can I, too, be a woman who grows closer to God through the years and not more haggard and tired from all the things I do? ......... It is a matter of inner beauty and deep soul work - the kind that comes from sitting at God's feet depending on Him and not my own efforts, to be a woman who is rested, rejuvenated and refreshing to all around her."

So, I said to myself after reading this. So you want to be beautiful Brandy?!?! You have a job to do. It is not external beauty, but the deep inner workings and growth that comes from a RIGHT relationship with the Lord Jesus Christ!

How I LONG to be a refreshing breeze to those around me. Especially my family!!! Father I long for this. I know it is Your will for me to be so. Help me to overcome my selfishness and bitterness and be like a tree planted by streams of water! Whose leaves do not whither! That I may be shade for others who need to find Your rest as well! Lord may it be so in my life!

Thank you Father for Your Word. Thank you for others who have walked the path before me! That I am not alone in this walk! Shoulder my burdens for me so that I may walk unhindered by the trivial and TRUST You for all my NEEDS!

Thoughts from my devotions

Sat, 23 Jun 2007 06:59:00 -0500

I am doing the book, When Women Long for Rest. It has been sooooooooo eye opening and encouraging!

Paraphrase:

We are here to do the will of the Father. Jesus came and DID the will of the Father, He did no more of no less. He is our perfect example of a faithful follower of God's will. We need to strive to do ONLY the things that HE gives us to do.

She puts here, What are those things?

#1 Love the Lord your God with all your heart, soul, mind and strength. Matt 22:37 "And he said to him, "You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. "

#2 Love your neighbor as yourslef Matt 22:39 "And a second is like it: You shall love your neighbor as yourself. "

#3 Act justly, love mercy, walk humbly with your God. Micah 6:8 "He has told you, O man, what is good;
and what does the LORD require of you
but to do justice, and to love kindness,
and to walk humbly with your God? "

#4 Be still and know that He is God Psalm 46:10 "Be still, and know that I am God.
I will be exalted among the nations,
I will be exalted in the earth!"

His burdens are not heavy OURS are! I am amazed that I put so much on my own shoulders and really I am making life so difficult and HARD. This is NOT his plan!!!! Father forgive me for doing that!

So what I heard this AM for myself was, ENJOY your day in ME! Serve with gladness as you would serve others serve your family, with a smile. Love them as a neighbor! Seek to be merciful. Have justice and do it with kindness. Be humble and walk quietly with the Lord.

Take time to be STILL today and seek the Lord so HE can be exhaulted in your/my life.

May we be women who are diligent in the RIGHT things and the things we CALLED to do and not just the RUSH and DO that seeps in.

I posted these words a few days ago...........

Sun, 8 Oct 2006 22:47:00 -0500

I posted these words a few days ago on a website I am part of.....

I am having a rough homeschool year. I knew it would be one BUT I had hoped I would be wrong.

I feel like a failure. I do.

I just want to jump ship and well give up.

I don't know what to do...except pray of course.

I am getting everything done...........it is one particular child that has me in a stew.

**************UPDATE*************

Not only am I nutsy coo coo, I am a completely pathetic parent. GRRRRRRRRRR!

I had a child spill my LONGED for once a month cup of Starbucks tonight before Bible Study..............
NEED I SAY MORE!!!!!!!!!!!! Shall I leave you to your imagination!!!!! OY I STINK!

******************I MEANT IT WHEN I SAID************

all I can do is pray!

And I did.
Fri AM is when I posted this and then I posted the edit on FRI night after our BIble Study. We are doing Shepherdin a Child's Heart.

I was so convicted FRI night , mostly by the quote, You need to engage and not just reprove.

I mulled on that Fri night and into Sat. On Sat I was convicted that I needed to get a vision which I also posted about, but where that went off to..who knows.

I got down on the paper, Brandy's Vision, and that was it, but I prayed, Lord help me fill this page with YOU plans and not mine.

So this AM SUN, I sooooooooooo did not want to go to church. I felt like lousing around the house. Well , of course, we went.

The Lord over the past few days had, PREPARED THE WAY for what He was wanting to teach me today.

The sermon was on John 6. The feeding of the 5,000 and then some.

The WHAT IN YOUR LIFE DO YOU THINK IS TO BIG FOR GOD TO HANDLE? Hummmm, did not take long for me to write, my homeschooling. What is my "if only"......... Well, mine was IF ONLY MY HOUSE WAS IN ORDER then God could use me.

Our pastor said, God reduces our resourses and magnifies our NEED! God wants and will answer my prayer ABUNDANTLY!

So this afternoon, I played a praise and worship CD and as I was mopping the floor on my hands and knees this song came on and I was overwhelmed!!! I lifted my hands and worshiped, I mean worshipped, for the first time in a LOOOOOONG time. The next song reduced me to tears once again.

I went out to Matt and said, come here!" grabbed his face between my hands and planted him with a kiss that made him forget his name. I said, I LOVE YOU! and walked back into the house.

THEN, my mom calls and says, Brandy, I want to keep all the children (that means all 7) tonight so you and Matt can go and see this movie we just saw. (We hardly go to the theater)

It was called, Facing the Giants.

Now girls!!!! Let me tell you! God had/has been working on softening my hard heart for 3 days now and I am/was already spiritually exhaused and on the verge of tears.

This movie, MINISTERED TO ME IN a way I can not explain!

All I can say is I want to give GOD 110% of my homeschool, marriage, children life!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I want to go to the filed goal line no MATTER WHAT! (run the race and have perseverence!)

I am overwhelmed what God has taught me the past few days. I feel like I have been hit with a SPIRITUAL Mac Truck!

The whole thing wrapped up in a neat package is, With God all things are possible."

Do we believe it??? I am telling you I have been chugging along IN MY OWN STRENGTH! I THOUGHT I was givin' it to God, but I was holding back!!!! I released to today! I want nothing but for GOD to have all the glory for everything!

Praise him in the good and praise him in the bad JUST HAVE TO PRAISE Him, LIKE JOB!

So, I ain't cured of my weaknesses and faults, but I am RELEASED AND FORGIVEN and I aim to move forward FOR CHRIST and HIS GLORY!

AMEN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Thanks Lord for helping me and forgiving me and MINISTERING to me even when I am NOT worthy! I love you and praise you!!! Your daughter, Brandy

I think I might be back....

Tue, 26 Sep 2006 12:21:00 -0500

Just wanted to post and stay active....

Are You A Reviler?

Mon, 5 Jun 2006 06:17:00 -0500

Do you vituperate?

Huh?!?! What do thos words mean? Reviler. Vituperate.

I was reading my Bible this morning and I decided to look up words that I read often, but needed to know the deeper meaning. (like integrity, immoral, swindler,covetous,effeminate, and revilers) As always I was blown away.

I am sure I have been told in the past what this word meant, but until this AM when the scales came off my eyes and I really heard what it says, I was blind and unknowing.

Revile means: assail with abusive language, vituperate.

I then had to look up vituperate, because, well, I did not know what that meant at all.

Vituperate: rebuke or critize harshly, abusively, berate.

In 1 Corinthians 6:8-10, It says, "8On the contrary, you yourselves wrong and defraud. You do this even to your brethren.

9Or do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived; neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor effeminate, nor homosexuals,

10nor thieves, nor the covetous, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor swindlers, will inherit the kingdom of God. "

DISCLAIMER:

I know these verses are about the unsaved and it was about sueing your brother .....we having been bought with a price have a free pass to heaven because of the blood of Jesus Christ. We get to inherit the Kingdom in HIS righteousness.

Now on to what struck me. When I looked up the word revile, I was not expecting this definition.

There are times, in frustration and anger, I say things to my husband or children that I ought not. I lump myself back into the word ever so quickly by my tounge. Words spoken that are like daggers to anothers heart.

Father forgive me for being a reviler!

Help me not to revile my husband or children. May my words be like honey and smooth to their ears.

Father, I am sorry I have read that word so many times in the Bible and did not look it up. I wish I was more of a scholar, or at least had more time to dig deeper without distraction. You know my heart though and I desire to do good and not evil. Help me to work on this area today, tomorrow and for all my time here on earth.

Thanks for teaching me through your Holy Spirit. I am sure I make Him tired....

The Life in Which I Now Lead

Mon, 15 May 2006 07:09:00 -0500

The Conflict of Two Natures

14For we know that the Law is spiritual, but I am of flesh, sold into bondage to sin.

15For what I am doing, I do not understand; for I am not practicing what I would like to do, but I am doing the very thing I hate.

16But if I do the very thing I do not want to do, I agree with the Law, confessing that the Law is good.

17So now, no longer am I the one doing it, but sin which dwells in me.

18For I know that nothing good dwells in me, that is, in my flesh; for the willing is present in me, but the doing of the good is not.

19For the good that I want, I do not do, but I practice the very evil that I do not want.

20But if I am doing the very thing I do not want, I am no longer the one doing it, but sin which dwells in me.

21I find then the principle that evil is present in me, the one who wants to do good.

22For I joyfully concur with the law of God in the inner man,

23but I see a different law in the members of my body, waging war against the law of my mind and making me a prisoner of the law of sin which is in my members.

24Wretched man that I am! Who will set me free from the body of this death?

25Thanks be to God through Jesus Christ our Lord! So then, on the one hand I myself with my mind am serving the law of God, but on the other, with my flesh the law of sin.

I hate Mother's Day! I really do! How can I sit in a place of esteem and celebration when I am such a wretched sinner and mom. As everyone said HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY to me my heart was sad and my soul cried out for them to STOP!

Then Chirst in HIS love had preordained for me to read this chapter this morning in my devotion! Oh how my heart rejoiced! Paul, a bond servant of Chirst, felt just like me. Bless this man for writing down the Words of God so I could read them this morning and be released form my self hatred!

When I read the words, I am doing the very thing I hate, I paused and wept in my heart, knowing full well this was me!

I yell, when gentle words should come, I glare, when I should smile and re direct the sweet child, I say, Leave me alone for ONE min., when I should gather them up in my arms and cuddle them, I sit and dawldle when I know I should be diligently working to get things in order. The list could go on believe me!!! OH believe me!

For the willing is present in me, but the doing of the good is not, Father God! You know this of me! I am in awe that you still love me and want me to be your child (I read that this morning too!) You adopted me! You accept me! YOU DIED FOR ME and are preparing a place for me.........EVEN though I sure don't deserve it!

I am willing Lord, but my flesh is so weak! Strengthen me UP! Stand me on the solid rock! May I hold up my head PROUD that I am your child, BUT so humble that I am not worthy on my own and need your covering! Thank you for setting me FREE! Thanks be to God through Jesus Christ our LORD!

Lord, You are AWESOME! You know I needed these words this morning! You gave the next chapter in Romans 8 as a gift, like a bandaid to the soul! I am resting in YOU and in YOUR love! Thanks for adopting me....eventhough I am a repeat offender! I love you!

There is poop on my shirt

Tue, 28 Mar 2006 16:17:00 -0600

and in my hair.

The crib is clean from where the 2 yr old finger painted the poop that ended up on me, my shirt and my hair.

There is a smidgen of blood on the tail of my shirt where a 2 yr old bit his lip and came running for cuddles.

My pony tail is at the base of my neck and it started at the top of my head.

Speghetti spilled on the floor and it needs swept.

All the little ones are cleaning thier rooms and my 13 yr old is making a speghtti dinner (i.e. how the speghtti ended up on the floor) Baby is sleeping in his crib and the catergory 4 hurricane Nate is watching the older brother cook.

Lord, thanks for the day. Even though when I first blogged this AM I did not expect the day to end this way, it is a good ending. RIGHT? This was your plan. I am searching for the nugget of treasure here (not the nugget of poop) Lord, help me find the sparkle amidst the trials of the day. I love you Lord. I love my children Lord. May I be found worthy to be called Momma.

Proverbs 2: 2-6

Tue, 28 Mar 2006 06:21:00 -0600

  2 Make your ear attentive to wisdom,
         Incline your heart to understanding;
    3For if you cry for discernment,
         Lift your voice for understanding;
    4If you seek her as silver
         And search for her as for hidden treasures;
    5Then you will discern the fear of the LORD
         And discover the knowledge of God.
    6For the LORD gives wisdom;
         From His mouth come knowledge and understanding. (all highlighting and emphasis mine)

Do you believe this? I was sitting at my table having my devotions this AM and I saw these verses. These were not my daily reading verses, these just "lept out" so to speak.

I sat in awe for a moment, just chewing on the word of the Lord. These verses rained down on me like HOT fire and consumed my thoughts!

The Lord ministered to me and pricked my heart with these verses.

If you are anything like me the drudgery of the day can overwhelm me. All the cooking, cleaning, schooling, training, and just plain living can take all my attention and energy! The LITTLE things just sap me dry (remember my all licked shut blog) and I am empty.

These verses reminded my of why I get up before the children. :)

These verses tell me that I am to seek these things and the Lord like hidden treasure. Did you watched National Treasure? It was about this family that gave their LIFE/lives to find this treasure. People mocked them, laughed at them and they were really considered NUTS! In the end they, of course, they found the treasure.They were HAILED victorious!

I think I need to be like these nuts in the movie. Searching and going into the scriptures DAILY. Looking and getting "dirty" for the Lord.

The Lord gives is what the last verses say. In the END at the END of my journey, when I have finished the treasure hunt (race) the Lord will give me what I have so earnestly sought!

I just need to continue to be diligent to seek Him and His ways like treasure.

Lord, from 5 min to 2 hours, whenever I seek You, you give me blessings and treasures here on earth. I can only imagine the WONDERFULNESS and AWESOMENESS of heaven! What JOYS and gifts You have in store for those who love you and seek YOU!

May all I do bring you glory and may I love you FAITHFULLY and DILIGENTLY!