A place where I sit and wonder how on earth we got here!!!??? http://www.homeschoolblogger.com/howdidwegethere/ en-us Homeschool Blogger Tue, 19 Feb 2008 06:16:00 -0600 Tue, 19 Feb 2008 06:16:00 -0600 Over to: How Did We get Here?   Come on over for a visit!!!!!!!! http://www.homeschoolblogger.com/howdidwegethere/483488/ Tue, 19 Feb 2008 06:16:00 -0600 http://www.homeschoolblogger.com/howdidwegethere/483488/ http://www.homeschoolblogger.com/howdidwegethere/464886/ Sun, 20 Jan 2008 15:48:00 -0600 http://www.homeschoolblogger.com/howdidwegethere/464886/   Jimmy and my little niece! She is So cute. I miss her terribly! Here is another!     http://www.homeschoolblogger.com/howdidwegethere/456348/ Sun, 6 Jan 2008 12:20:00 -0600 http://www.homeschoolblogger.com/howdidwegethere/456348/ What an amazing devotional. I have read this sporadically in the past and was very blessed. A small group of my friends and I decided to read through this together. I cannot express what a blessing it has been to me. Peter is one of the people in God's word I truly empathize with. I react as he did. I get all in a tizzy, I react to everything and THEN I calmly think about things and figure out the proper response. Sigh! I am so weak in this area. Anyone who wants to send up a prayer for me regarding this, please feel free!! Anyway. Yesterdays reading stood out to me. I decided to share something I shared with my on-line bible reading friends. I hope it encourages you as it did me. I LOVE when His Word reaches into the depths of my heart. he so lovingly teaches and guides. He so tenderly works with my faults. WHY did this little blurb miss my attention yesterday when I read! “All our vows and resolutions end in denial because we have no power to carry them out. When we come to the end of ourselves, not in imagination but really, we are able to receive the Holy Spirit.” OC MUFHH 1/5   WOW! Did I need to read that! I never really looked at Peter and his “vows” in such a way. When Peter said he would “go” at that moment, it was in his OWN strength. It was not until he was broken that it became something he could actually do by God’s strength. Christ new that Peter would have to go through denying Him before Peter would truly be ready to “go”.   I NEED some of that brokenness. Over these past years I have developed these bad habits of always re-dedicating a portion of my life, constantly living in fear that my last “promise” or “vow” was not sincere enough and that God is not pleased with my so called “mediocrity”. The truth is, all those vows and promises were made in my own strength, and they would NEVER come to fruition because anything done in the flesh will NOT yield the righteousness I SO desired!   Going through these trials these past months, I am able to see how much I worked within the confines of my unholy flesh. Always seeking and striving to earn what God will so feely gives if only I would yield to HIS will and stop trying to impose MY will onto Him. Does that make sense?   I wish I had more time to write more of what is racing through my mind! So much! I HAD to share this and get it down to someone who would listenJJ! I need to go and help take down the Christmas décor outside the house! Wouldn’t want to become one of those people that leave the lights up until Easter!     http://www.homeschoolblogger.com/howdidwegethere/456298/ Sun, 6 Jan 2008 08:37:00 -0600 http://www.homeschoolblogger.com/howdidwegethere/456298/ and WHAT an amazing thing for me to read! The author's experience in the world of "fundamental Christianity" was so similar to mine! Since she was able to articulate this WAY better than I could ever dream, I decided to quote her and link toher blog. DISCLAIMER: I have not read everything she has on her blog and therefore, I cannot say I agree 100% with what you may find there!     Cynthia’s Story: The year was 2000.  Once again, I was on my annual retreat to a local statewide homeschooling conference.  That year, as I stood in line to register, was already different and I had no idea what God had in store for me later.  I was there not as an eager participant anticipating a weekend of encouragement but as a heartbroken parent.  Just the weekend before, my husband and I were slammed with the reality of some things going on in my oldest daughter’s life.  All that we had worked for, all that we had prayed for, all that we had strived to produce in our children seemed shattered.  With tears in my eyes, I gazed at the perfect homeschooling families with their pasted on smiles and matching clothes.  That is what we used to be and at that point, I felt lost and confused. I started out my parenting journey in 1984 as a single mother but not for long.  My husband met and fell in love with me when I was seven months pregnant.  The next year we would marry and begin to build a Godly family.  We were young and had no idea of how to raise children.  Oh but there were plenty of Christian experts willing to guide us along the way.  It was my deepest desire to be a good mom, to love my children and protect them from the heartache that my own rebellion and mistakes had brought.  It was as if I set out to redeem my own life through the lives of my children.  I was looking for results and the parenting formulas made sense to me then. There were promises that if I just did A, B, C and D then my children would be cheerful, obedient, godly children.  Coupled with the mandate that this was my calling, my duty to produce children for the Lord who would grow up to serve him, the rules of parenting became my guiding force.  The children were young, compliant and our family looked picture perfect.  Compliments were plenty and I thought all was well.  We were being obedient to God; we were following the recipe.  There were if and then charts, punishments were handed out for any infraction.  If you broke the rule, you paid the consequence.  God was an angry God who required cheerful obedience and holiness; nothing less was acceptable. When it all came crashing in that spring of 2000, I felt like I was being spun in a hurricane.  I had no bearings, no idea where we had gone wrong, no plan for the next step.  God had me right where he wanted me.  Only when all I had held onto, all that I had replaced Him with, all the parenting books and charts … only when all that was gone could I hear that still small voice speak to me.  It came through the voice of Mark Hamby who was speaking at the conference that year.  I stood in the back of that room, tears of sorrow streaming down my face and Mark made a statement, not even directed to parenting, but absolutely what I needed to hear.  He said, “Wives, you need to let your husbands fail so that God can do the work He needs to do in their lives.”  My heart was split open by the finger of God at that moment and my true motives were revealed.  My spirit was broken and I turned to the One who should have been guiding me all along.  He picked me up, turned me around and set me on a 180 degree turn around.  I have never looked back. Three things God revealed to me that day.  Our home was controlled by fear.  The children obeyed in fear and I parented in fear.  It was that failure that Mark Hamby spoke to that I feared.  I feared failing as a parent.  I believed that my children were a reflection of me, of my success.  They had to be good so that I could be good.  It was up to me to produce Godly children and if I could do that, then I was a good mother.  The key element that was missing was assurance of Love.  God taught me that perfect love drives away fear.  I had not known His perfect love yet and certainly was not demonstrating that toward my own children.  As I began to know and trust the Love of the Father and as my children began to be assured of my love, fear left our home.  Love is the driving force now. The second thing God revealed to me that day was my pride.  It was an ugly monster that consumed my life.  As my parenting methods seemed to show results and as people recognized my efforts, the pride swelled inside me.  It’s a heady thing to be complimented about your children, to be asked for advice and teach others how to accomplish the same things.  It become all the more important that my children perform well so that the pride monster could continue being fed which led me to be more controlling, more strict, more harsh.  I look back in complete gratefulness to the fall of our idyllic family.  With that break, I finally began to understand that God gives grace to the humble.  He began to teach me how to walk in humility with my children and grace became the most beautiful thing to me. The fear and the pride all settled into the third thing that God revealed in me.  Selfishness.  My motivations were centered on me.  It was all about my being a good mother, my self esteem as a parent, my accomplishments.  The very opposite of what people thought of me.  Being the mother of nine children, I was never accused of being selfish.  But I was.  God led me to Colossians and a verse I used against the children so many times.  “Consider others as more important than yourself”, He told me.  It went counter to all that I had been taught about parenting and my need to establish authority over my children.  God asked me to place myself beneath them.  Seven years have passed since my epiphany into the grace of God and how to live that out toward my children.  God had an immediate paradigm shift for me and the learning process has been constant.  My trust in God has increased exponentially.  These years have not been absent of some very difficult times.  At first, I believed if I just parented differently, then the results would be better.  God had to get my eyes off of striving for results.  Grace filled positive parenting is not just another method to produce Godly children.  It is a life filled with God’s love and perspective.  I am so thankful for the journey that started with heart break but led us into a life of trusting God.  – You can read more from Cynthia at her blog, A Life Profound.  http://www.homeschoolblogger.com/howdidwegethere/454667/ Thu, 3 Jan 2008 10:35:00 -0600 http://www.homeschoolblogger.com/howdidwegethere/454667/ but I feel like I have! A quick summary.... Stomach flu, eye surgery, kidney infection, kidney infection again, Epstein Barre Virus! See what I mean. The kids had the bug, Josiah had the surgery, I had the infection that will not go away PLUS the doctor called and told me I had EBV and need ro rest......for like 2 months!! UGH! We have been discussing the definition of rest on a Moms board that I go to. Personally, I define rest WAY different than most. I kind of think I should do "power" cleaning in the a.m. and rest the rest of the day. HMPH! Most people do not agree with that. I am SO not a rester. I don't even rest when there's nothing to get done. Sigh and sigh! Well, the Lord obviously knows what it is I need. I am going to TRY and rest. I have so much to get done for Christmas. I am supposed to host dinner for my in-laws. The FIRST Christmas dinner we have ever had wioth them. I cancelled my trip to see my little sister.....who is pregnant again! YAY!!! Well, I guess I will spend time vegging in front of old Christmas movies, rearranging my school schedules, and getting on the computer more than I have in 6 months! Appreciate the prayers.....   http://www.homeschoolblogger.com/howdidwegethere/442587/ Tue, 11 Dec 2007 07:05:00 -0600 http://www.homeschoolblogger.com/howdidwegethere/442587/ OH! I just love the snow. it is so comforting to me to sit on the couch with a fleece blanket and watch the snnow falling. We have a nush in the front yard that looks like a large coffee crumb cake muffin! You know, the kins that is covered with powdered sugar and yet you can still see the small, brown sugary mixture peeking through the top? Zachary has been asking.......begging! for snow ever since he saw there was a "chance" of flurries on weather.com! I heard him running up the stairs this morning and look out the window. There was an energetic YES! and then he proceeded to curl up on the couch with a fleece......just like Mama! Around here, we all have our own fleece blankets. Some have more than one, actually! I On the big couch (as opposed to the loveseat), we keep a huge queen sized quilt that I made years ago. It is fought over on a regular basis and shows the brusies to prove it! Anyone know HOW to fix a quilt? I know how to make one, but not fix one! I wish I had time for quilting..... As a matter of fact, these days I am finding myself wishing for the ONE thing I simply cannot make........more time! Yesterday Meagan, Josiah and I went for a lovely walk through the small town of Hawley, PA. It is less than 15 minutes from our home and simply full of adorable shops, old fashioned diners, and the neates play house! Meg and Josiah went over to the candy store to check things out in the snack department! I wondered up to the World Dance Theatre. I met the proprietor who was the nicest guy! He and his wife have recently taken charge of the theater and are offering all manner of classes. Art, drama, ballroom dancing, Irish step dancing, and Karate. So, how what does this all have to do with my desire for more time? I want more time to Do some of these things! I would love to have the time to take an aerobics class with Meagan, join the drama group and do play or make fantabulous costumes! Not that I have any skill, but I would still love to do it. Or, and this is one of those deep, dark, hidden secrets of mine.....one of those things that not even my husband knows and I am now sharing this with the public........I would love to learn how to draw and paint like Tasha Tudor! So, time is what I need more of. Maybe it is more that I need to get the time I do have in right order? I have read and utilized dozens of time managment books/schedules. I know HOW to manage time, yet I find it challenging to implement them on a consistent level. I do them for a while and then something gets thrown into the mix.....a trip to the emergency room, a sick Grama, an impromptu visit to NYC for the weekend. Then, the schedule of my dreams gets thrown to the wayside! Oh well. I love that my life is on the unpredictable saide. Most of the time, anyway! Plus I know I am now entering into a new dimension of life! My boys are old enough to leave home for 2-3 hours without the fear of them burning the place down! Ryan is just as good at watching the younger boys as Ryan is.....depending on the attitude of the younger boys, that is! I can tell when they will be ornery and need to come with me. So, maybe the lord will allow me some time to do those fun things I have had to put off over the past years. I have NO regrets and i do not want to sound as though I am complaining. On the contrary. Yesterday was invigorating to me. It challenged me to take the chance to consider that I could possibly accomplish some of these things! Off to get some other things done. Ryan has his first digital photography class and this afternoon I am torturing Meagan by making her come with me to a free Irish step dancing class! possibly, I will have pictures to follow........   http://www.homeschoolblogger.com/howdidwegethere/424370/ Sat, 10 Nov 2007 06:56:00 -0600 http://www.homeschoolblogger.com/howdidwegethere/424370/ I had mentioned in a previous post that we went to a small PA town and walked around. Here are a few interesting pictures! A nice antiques store!     Silly boys! We did not tell them what they were looking through! And just WHO decorates these things? We see them ALL over PA. Wierd???   http://www.homeschoolblogger.com/howdidwegethere/418010/ Tue, 30 Oct 2007 18:44:00 -0500 http://www.homeschoolblogger.com/howdidwegethere/418010/ OK, he is not exactly my own son, but I figured I'd share what our dear friend Josiah has decided to don himself with:   That's not really a good picture of it as that was the first day and it still is red. What a silly. We told him to wait and be sure, but he was sure and so there it is! We all think it looks rather cute. OK, most of us. Can anyone out there guess who thinks THAT was the most ridiculous thing ever??? That would be Jimmy. OY! he has been merciless with the comments, but Jim is also of the opinion that guys do crazy things sometimes and he is really ok with it! Meg thinks it is great. I think that;s the whole "bad boy" thing.....which Josiah is surely NOT! It is the "potential"  to be bad..........he consistently chooses to do good. Of course, there are those that think this is a VERY "bad boy" thing. That's fine. We are all entitled to our opinions! I never did have an issue with earrings or long hair unless is it extreme. I know oftentimes it is a heart issue as well. WHY do we do the things we do, who do we do them for? Personally, I do not believe the Bible gives clear NT info on this. I could be wrong and if anyone wants to share, I'm open!   just thought I'd share a bit of our crazy life! I sure know there are WORSE thing that could be done! http://www.homeschoolblogger.com/howdidwegethere/418004/ Tue, 30 Oct 2007 18:32:00 -0500 http://www.homeschoolblogger.com/howdidwegethere/418004/ This weekend, we were blessed to spend some time with a re-found friend! We met Lynne and her family a few years ago and sort of lost touch. I was so pleasantly surprised to reconnect! My children adore hers! My husband her her husband get along fabulously! we sat and chatted and talked and shared and laughed. it was very relaxing. On Saturday night was watched a movie called The Village. It is not a horror movie, thought the previews lead you to believe that! it is about a group of people that have tried to hide from the evils of this world only to find out that murder is in the hearts of men! In the end, they found a way to stay isolated. It was very disturbing to me because it hit too close to home. we were "isolationists" for so long. We thought we could hid in our own world and keep our family from any negative things. We controlled by fear. Sad to say, it was true. But control by fear is simply falling into the trap of another fear! We cannot keep sin from our "world' because it is IN us. All we can do is walk by faith that Jesus will guide us and keep us safe and that HE is greater in me than anything IN this world. Meagan viewed this with us. She has a lot of thoughts on this as well but I am sure she will post them on her blog Sunday we attended a poultry show!!Man! i never knew there was so much to know about birds. There were so many different kinds and of course, I forgot my camera and have NONE to share. Sigh. Afterwards we headed back to the house where we met a lovely couple, Ally and Hogar. he is from Germany and has a neat accent! They bought their first ducks and chickens! What a fun family they are. I began a new eating program today. To be sure, you will all grow weary of tales of losing weight! BUT, I am determined. I have lost that pesky 45 pounds over 2 years! I have gained back 10! UGH! NO MORE!. South beach Diet and WATP walking videos!!! My goals: Drink 2-3 quarts of water a day Walk at least 2 miles 4-6 times per week Follow the plan! I cannot really start until I buy some things, but today is ok so far! I want to lose 15 pounds by january 1st and another 30 by April 30th. We shall see!! Meagan is in NYC this week. We miss her terribly!!   http://www.homeschoolblogger.com/howdidwegethere/412864/ Mon, 22 Oct 2007 11:29:00 -0500 http://www.homeschoolblogger.com/howdidwegethere/412864/