YAY!!! We get to go shopping! my grandma is coming in a half hour to pick my sisters and I up for a day out!!! yay! i can't wait

drama practice - everyone is getting on everyone else's nerves. thus begins the most hectic time. lol it always gets crazy when it is goign from 'oh we have weeks' to 'oh my gosh we only have 6 more practices!! and i suck!!' so yeah there has been a lot of toe stepping... mostly by me... forgive me Lord.

in case you didn't know it i am very good at irritating people . especially stupid ones.

well i am off to wake me sister up. and then 15 minutes til!

oh and the subline had nothing to do with the post. i just didn't want to further that thought. lol justincase they would read it LOL

E out - shopping!!

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yeah life gets these weird phases that I get the pleasure of goign through every once in a while. lets see.

1st thing. as you read in my last blog my friend Toby was shot and killed last thursday. and what hurts the most is everybody that i have talked with about it save Nathan and Robin has been like "oh yeah i heard about that - you know so and so was really tore up about it" or "yeah this person is really not ok with that." ya know what?! neither  am i. it really hurts. to know that i won't ever get teased by him again. that i won't ever see that smirk of his again. and people are so worried about everybody else being upset by it...

i assume it is because i have always been the strong one. butya know what? This warrior - the strong one who has all the answers and is 'wonderwoman' (yeah right) is still a little girl inside who lost someone she loved. "they don't know that I go running home when i fall down; they don't who picks me up when no one is around..." twila paris song and my life's theme it seems. . . i am strong. there isn't a lot that can hurt me - becuase A: i don't let it and B: nobody knows me that well enough to hurt me.

because of crap people have put me through i haven't let hardly anyone get close to me these past months. i don't cry on people anymore. because when i do their attitude towards me changes. I let them see the part of me that hurts, that is vulnerable and they look at it, and pour salt on it. there are 3 people i cry on. my mom, my dad and my 2nd mom Robin. i don't even cry on my best friend. and there is no offense there - he is my best friend for a reason! but i have cried an people before and they have hurt me so bad i don't trust my sister with my tears. and it kinda hurts me that i have to be so guarded with people - but there are some people that i thot were one way and they proved to be another way all around. and now i have to wonder is everyone like that with me? (can you tell i don't feel very good emotionally?) is everyone showing the tender soft and loving side of me just so they can hurt me down the road? sorry, but i don't want that!!!!!!

2. my crock broke tonight. sigh.

Now for the good stuff.

1. Today is my best friend's birthday! Happy Birthday Nathan!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! <<>>

2. i got to watch Madea's class reunion and Diary of a Mad Black Woman. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAWESOME movies - i think every teen should see them.

3.my birthday party is this friday.  oh and bad news part of it - one of my grands aren't coming. that really sucks - i don't believe she's come to any of my recent birthday parties. maybe she doesn't like big parties i don't know but i do know it would mean a lot to me if she would come to one.

4. I got a new set of clothes to wear for my birthday party :) Grandma and Papa C (the ones who aren't coming) sent me a gorgeous black and red suit - and now i am looooooovign it! i can't wait for friday

5. Theatre arts is this friday. i can't wait - i am excited about it :)

please keep me in your prayers - i am being hit really really hard right now. some of my friends are turning out not to be friends anymore, or not as close as they were - and the thing that hurts is i trusted them with secrets and stuff and now they are like... leaving me or something. golly i hate PMS... you know i'm on it when i have blog posts where i say stuff like that lol.

i am just really tired, don't want to go to church, don't want to go to work - in fact... you want to knwo what I really want to do? Theatre arts on Fridays; church on sunday mornings; drama practice (if i don't have to talk to anyone) and stay home. i don't want to shop, i don't want to spend the night anywhere, i don't want to do anything, see anyone much less speak to anyone except my family and my 2nd family the Smiths. thats it. i am feeling so vulnerable and so hurt right now i do not want to let anyone in that has hurt me in the past, or is showing potential of hurting me. So if any of my friends read this please pray for me. I am not doign well at all... at all.

E out.

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PICKENS, S.C. - A Charleston man fatally shot his grandson, then killed himself on Thursday afternoon, the Pickens County coroner said. According to investigators, Toby Petitt, 16, was arguing with his mother at their home on Harris Road in Pickens County.

The teenager's grandfather, 74-yeqar-old George Petit, was upset by the argument and threatened to return home to Charleston, investigators said.

Investgiators said that the mother parked her car behind the grandfather's to keep him from leaving.

That's when George Petit got a gun out of his car, the coroner said.

The teen tried to get his grandfather to put down the gun, but the man shot the teen in the chest and then shot himself in the head, the coroner said.

According to investigators, George Petit came to the Upstate to live with family two months ago, after the death of his wife.

I hate the news.

this is like... maybe 25% true. here is the story again - with the real story in bold.

PICKENS, S.C. - A Charleston man fatally shot his grandson, then killed himself on Thursday afternoon, the Pickens County coroner said. The grandfather was arguing with Sheila and he wanted to leave.

Investgiators said that the mother parked her car behind the grandfather's to keep him from leaving.

That's when George Petit got a gun out of his car, the coroner said.

My friend and used-to-be neighbor Toby jumped acrosss the car and knocked his grandfather down. as he turned to run away his grandfather shot him in the back. realizing what he had done he shot himself and killed himself.

I would really appreciate it if the news would correctly portray this story.

I've known Toby Petitt for 11 years. When we moved up here from columbia they lived next to us and we would play in our woods. he was one of the nicest kids I have EVER known.

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