I've noticed that my wardrobe is slowly changing. My shorts are getting longer and I am careful how "fitted" my shirts are. God is making me more modest, or am aware that I am aging, maybe both. Anyway, I think it is a good thing.

I know that some Christians believe that proper dress for a woman is a skirt, the longer the better. And on the other end of the spectrum, some Christian women do not seem aware that they are exposing more than they should.

I am in the middle. I love feminine dress, but I do not feel I have to wear a skirt to be feminine.

Shortly after my husband and I dedicated our lives to Christ, I had a difficult time figuring out what to wear. When I shopped, I chose conservative clothing because I thought it appeared more "Christian." I never felt comfortable in them though.

Then I turned back to my old ways of dress with a longer hemline and a higher neckline added. My husband was overjoyed. Through his comments, he let me know that he was sad that Christianity was allowing me to lose my spark in creativity which I often showed through dress.

Through this experience I have learned not to judge others by how they dress. We are all in a different place in our walk with Christ. God will change the heart of every believer to express His creativity within each of us.

But judging is not the same as guiding. I am now an "older woman" to many young believers. When I see a Christian woman wearing something completely inappropriate that would lead the eyes of men astray, I feel compelled to let her know. To keep my tongue from getting out of hand, I wait for the prompting of the Holy Spirit before I speak, and have found that unless I already have a relationship with this woman, the Spirit says quiet.

Have you all had experience with this?

How have you handled the situation?

Do you find yourself becoming more modest as you walk with God?

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Posted by LizzieBee

I do dress more modestly than I used to, and I have lately been reading "Christian Modesty and the Public Undressing of America" by Jeff Pollard. I haven't finished it yet, and I'm not entirely sure I agree with everything he says, but I do know that modest dressing is where God is leading me. I haven't had the opportunity to mentor any young women (other than my 15-year-old daughter, who is already a modest dresser), but I think your approach is right. The Holy Spirit will lead. We attend a very, very large church and the dress goes from one extreme to the other. The youth ministries, in my opinion, are quite problematic, for there is a great amount of inappropriate dress on the part of the young people. The pastors don't have a handle on it, though they do send home written requests for modest dress. I think Christianity in America, in general, has not found a workable solution to how Christians should dress. Anyway, thanks again for blogging!

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Posted by AcceptanceWithJoy

I have had several discussion with my husband on just this topic. It seems that raising a teen girl and talking about modesty just go hand-in-hand.

In the past, I had always kind of agreed with CS Lewis. “A girl in the Pacific islands wearing hardly any clothes and a Victorian lady completely covered in clothes, might both be equally "modest," proper, or decent, according to the standards of their own societies: and both, for all we could tell by their dress, might be equally chaste (or equally unchaste)."

Lately though, I have to wonder ~ when the style of dress is designed to purposely create an aura of sexuality... Isn't that violating chastity? I mean, a girl on the Pacific Island in 100+ degree whether and 99% humidity may indeed find a "skimpy" outfit functional.

But, how does that relate to what we see happening in the USA today? When we live in air conditioned buildings a majority of the time, why do the girls today find the need to expose so much of their skin?

Anyway, no answers here ~ I am praying. My husband is setting limits. When we go shopping, the rule is, "Can you wear that at the dinner table in front of Dad?" She is pretty good at complying. She has lost some of her treasured outfits (and, therefore, hard earned money) to my husband's confiscating and trashing ways!

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Posted by Mamma1420/ClassicalMamma

The more I realized that my daughter wanted to be like me, the more modest my dressing choices became. Not starchly matron type but just no more bust enhancers, no more unreasonable high heels. I loved my heels, my dancing shoes. What's funny is that I donated them to the church yard sale. Three inch heels that look like they belong to a ....fill in your own blank.

I typically wear capris with polo shirts or t-shirts in the summer at home and skirts or pressed capris with a nice top to church. I'm becoming very low-maintenance as I get older, maybe it's just so many other things require more maintenance than I think I do.

Jessica

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Posted by hsmomof2

I have always been a modest dresser, being shy (and overweight :-) ) and not wanting to call attention to myself. Now that I have a daughter modesty is becoming more of a topic. It is amazing and discouraging to see the clothing that is put out there for little girls! (Mine is 7.) I agree that a person can be modest and not be wearing a "bag dress" as my husband calls them. :-) Thanks for stopping by my blog today and leaving your nice comment!

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Posted by ronandjess

I had similar issues when I began to dress modestly because I was doing it for legalistic reasons and not from the heart. When my heart changed I was able to become fully modest. My mother raised me to dress very modestly and I always resented it because no one else did, I did't truly understand the reasons.
Recently I have watched men position themselves so they can see down the top of a well developed 15 year old and it terrifies me because I have 3 daughters!! They currently have no opinion because they are 3, 2, and 5months but I want them mostly to grow up with a modest heart so the modest appearal is not an issue.
I also have begun to guard my children on who we are often around because of what they wear. My son is 8 years old and I would not allow him to look at Vickis Secret so why let them into my home. At the store at church and other places I can explain to him that God has certain desires for women and it is something mommy must share but I want him to be disgusted to see a girl in a halter top and daisy dukes. For my girls I want them to see a soul in need of saving or at least helping. I used to dress in a very crude way because I wanted that male attention and that is the reason most girls do it, I try to explain this to my children and pray that I am an example they look up to and not dipise.
Thank you for writing on this topic it is comforting to know that others are out there.
Jess

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