I was recently given the book Practicing Hospitality: The Joy of Serving Others by Pat Ennis and Lisa Tatlock and I it has really opened my eyes to a biblical perspective of hospitality.  I have found it to be both extremely practical and also feeding(and sometimes convicting) to my soul.  There are many things that I am learning from it, but one that I have really taken away from it is remembering to pray before, during and after we have people to our home.  I have to admit that most of the time when we entertain in the days (and especially) in the minutes preceding guests arrival prayer has not been on my list of things to do and it really needs to be! 

From the book:

PRAY BEFORE I EXTEND HOSPITALITY BECAUSE I

• should have a sincere heart when I extend the invitation(Phil 1:10)
• know that for the event to bring glory to my heavenly Father, I must have His strength(Phil 4:13)
• want to have a heart that submit to my heavenly Father's instructions(Rom. 12:13b)
• need to approach any opportunity to minister with a "hearty attitude" (Col 3:23)
• have a desire to wear "the garment of humiity" to the occasion (1 Pet 5:5)
• desire to have a gracious spirit in the midst of unforeseeable circumstances( Prov 11:16)
• wish to glean from the wisdom of my guests (Prov 1:5)
• seek genuinely to meet the needs of my guests( 1 John 3:17)
• long for my extension of hospitality to have far-reaching implications(Heb 13:2)
• need to be excited about allowing others to catch a glimpse of my character where it is most graphically displayed - in my home - especially if I am in a position of leadership (1 Tim 3:1-2; Titus 1:7-8)
• desire to stimulate conversations that are edifying (Rom 15:1-2) and encouraging (1 Thess 5:11) to my guests

I have realized that this translates into my day with my children as well.  As we make each transition during the day, am I taking the moment to ask God's blessing upon it? Change my heart/mood towards this child? For graciousness and patience? Realize that interruptions were allowed by God to make me more like Christ? Etc, etc.

I also loved the chapter on Hospitality and Family as it really convicted me to "treat my family as good as guests".  We extend hospitality to them too and model it when we show love to them through it.  Do my children see a different person in the moments preceding the guests' arrival than they see two moments AFTER my guests' arrival?  Do I show more kindness toward strangers than I do to my own family members?  I occasionally wonder what kind of mother I would be if I treated my children in the way I treat children who visit our home or children I might minister to at church. OUCH!  Areas to grow...

If you are looking to grow in this area and see that Hospitality is not all about serving some gourmet foods and bringing out your china, I highly recommend it.  There are some great recipes too!

Blessings!

-J

God granted me an awesome "light bulb" moment this week that I thought I would share.  But you may need a little background.  When I became a Christian, I prayed that God would give me something really cool to do for Him.  As I've talked about before, I never planned to be a stay at home mom, much less a homeschooling one.  In fact, God called me home from the workplace kicking and screaming.  He had to lay me off before I actually got the message that He wanted to be home, and even then I kept trying to find things to do outside of the home.  I thought maybe that if I worked for a non-profit or for a church, then I would really be serving Him.  But over time, He closed doors(sometimes slammed) and showed me that He wanted me to be home, raising our children.  I have learned to consider this my ministry, but part of me has always struggled because full time motherhood was never something that I chose for myself.  Because of this, I have consistently felt unprepared, frustrated and overwhelmed with the task of being a "manager of my home".

 This week my devotions led me to Ephesians 3 where Paul is talking about his ministry to the Gentiles:  "to be specific, that the Gentiles are fellow heirs and fellow members of the body, and fellow partakers of the promise in Christ Jesus through the gospel, of which I was made a minister, according to the gift of God's grace which was given me according to the working of His power." Eph 3:6-7  The MacArthur Study bible says this:  "Paul did not choose the stewardship of his apostleship or ministry.  God had sovereignly commissioned him with the calling, spiritual gifts, opportunities, knowledge and authority to minister as the apostle to the Gentiles.  No person can make himself a minster/servant of God because the calling, message, work and empowering of genuine ministry to and for God are His prerogative alone to give."  You see, Paul didn't choose his ministry either - in fact Paul had been doing the exact opposite of spreading the gospel when God called Him.  This means that I could not have chosen this ministry of homeschooling mother to my children on my own and that it was no surprise to God that I wasn't "prepared".  And just like Paul, God has equipped me for my ministry though it might not be as I would have liked to have been prepared.  God does this because if I had chosen it and it turned out well, He knows me well enough to know that I would take all the credit.  This way, it has to be something where I have to constantly rely on God and "God's grace which was given me according to the working of His power".  

For me, to remember that God knew my background and still gave me this ministry to my husband and my children even when I didn't really want it encourages me so much.  He has not set me up to fail; He is not punishing me.  Just as Paul didn't feel qualified for what God called Him to do:  "To me, the very least of all saints, this grace was given, to preach to the Gentiles the unfathomable riches of Christ."Eph 3:8  I too am unworthy of this high calling to which God has called me to.  God will keep me humble in my ministry in my home because up until a few years ago I had no clue how to be a Godly wife & mother or how to run a household efficiently.   AND the same grace with which God called me to will give me the power to do what He wants me to do.  "This was in accordance with the eternal purpose which He carried out in Christ Jesus our Lord, in whom we have boldness and confident access through faith in Him."(Eph 3:11-12)  I have an eternal purpose! and I have confident access to ask for help as I need it.  Raising children in the ways of the Lord is way more important than what I had in mind when I prayed to God so long ago. 

And don't get me started on what this means as a pastor's wife!

Blessings!

-J

This week we will "finish up" a very light 4 week study of Stewardship that was to include NERF(Nutrition, Exercise, Rest & Fun).  I hadn't planned for it to be so light, but God kept giving  us some "divine interruptions and appointments" in the past month that has made it hard to keep on schedule. 

We read through some great books on food and nutrition, took a field trip to the Pumpkin Patch(see below) where we learned about how different foods are grown(how some foods we eat the roots and others we eat the tops), we took a field trip to Whole Foods Market where we learned about organic vs. non-organic and where different foods come from, we learned about the food groups, food nutrients(carbs, protein, fats, etc) and the food pyramid.  We learned the names of different muscles in our bodies.  We completed the Presidential fitness test with our PE group.  But we learned more about Stewardship through some real life experiences God provided us with.

We had the opportunity to minister to a family who came to our church one Sunday morning with a 10 mth old, a 2 year old and the wife was 2 days overdue who had no money left and no place to stay.  My kids got a crash course in being a pastor's family as we hurriedly made preparations to give them lunch before BW helped them find a place to stay for the night and arranged an appointment with the local Pregnancy Resource Center.  Unfortunately, we later found out that they have been living in hotels for months through donations of various churches in our valley and they lied to us that the husband had a job as well as other things ( We are thankful that we did what we know God would have wanted us do, even though we later found out that they were "scamming" us as we are accountable to God for how we treat others.  Unfortunately for them, they will be accountable too for what they have done with what they've been given.  Please pray for them that God would help them to see their sin and be merciful as they are taking advantage of God's people - a matter God will not take lightly.)  But I had a real life chance to talk about nutrition as the 10 mth old had been fed cow's milk instead of formula and was very constipated, to talk about being good stewards of the things we are given and that we need to be ready always to serve and share the blessings God has given us.

This week, we were blessed to share our home with a fellow seminary family who was evacuated due to the California fires(Praise God that their home was spared).  What a lesson in stewardship as we explained to the kids that one of the reasons they have chores and we need to keep the house clean is that we never know when there will be a "divine appointment" for us to share our home with someone and we want them to feel welcome and at home rather than sitting in a messy house.   

But, if I am honest, I was the one who was most convicted as we read the verses about Stewardship.  Am I treating my body as a temple of the Holy Spirit in what I put into it?  Do I behave as if my body is a living sacrifice at all times?  Do I put God to the test by putting unhealthy food into my body and then expecting Him to protect me when my body has a bad reaction to it? (i.e. one cannot live on peanut butter & jelly crusts and a coke until dinner)  Do I offer my family a wide variety of healthy foods and stand firm that they must eat it because I know what they need better than they do or do I just offer them something that I know they like so I don't have a battle?   Am I a good steward of the time God gives me in my day?  Are my priorities His priorities?  Am I willing to freely share what I have been given it or do I tend to hoard things "just in case" I might need them someday?

So although according to my checklist of what I had planned to complete in this unit study has fewer check marks than I would like, I can't say that it wasn't beneficial to my family.  I pray that I will make the changes that I've been convicted of - the very fact that I shared them with BW and now with you all will hopefully keep me accountable as we head into the next study of Stewardship of Careers & Money that we will be starting next week.

Blessings!

-J

I was so blessed to have the opportunity to attend an amazing Women's Event this past Saturday which really helped me to see how important the moment by moment worship of my Great Savior is.  If someone had asked me before, if I thought worship was important I would have said, Absolutely!  But this conference helped me to really see how to put it into practice.  If you'd like some practical help in this area, I highly recommend the book How to Worship Jesus Christ by Joseph Carroll. 

Like all disciplines(yuck!), it takes work to begin to have a discipline of worship in your life.  I'm not talking about just singing or having your daily quiet time, but a life that exudes a love for our beautiful Savior every moment of our lives.  In the past I would have thought that I was too busy to even think of trying to begin this type of discipline, but I now see that I am not all that God created me to be if I don't have it. 

Picture this common scene of a mom who will remain anonymous:  While the mom was making her bed, her two year old decided he would pour his own milk and made a mess all over the floor, a four year old "accidentally" scribbled on the couch and two other children are fighting over what seems to their mother an insignificant piece of plastic but to them is the only thing in their lives that will make them happy.  That mother can "choose" to lose it and start screaming at all of them and ask them "What are you all thinking?" and unload all of her frustrations on them, threatening to send them all to their rooms until they are 50..... OR she can "choose" to worship God and remember how patient God is with her when she messes up time after time, often because she just doesn't know any better and how merciful and loving He was to save someone like her and remember that He has a purpose and a plan even for this annyoying moment in her life.  And gradually, her pulse begins to slow and her adrenaline decreases and her clenched teeth begin to relax and she is able to respond with patience and love, disciplining as necessary but not out of anger.  Because now it is no longer about how the mom has been inconvenienced, but about how even this can be an act of worship to our Lord. 

You may be saying, yeah right!  How do you stop yourself from flying off the handle?  Well, it's a discipline(yuck, I know!).  I need to train myself just as an athlete trains to become more godly and to handle all circumstances with worship rather than taking the easy and ineffective route of losing it(anger does not achieve the righeousness of man, remember?).  I need to realize that God is always with me and that He is watching and holding me accountable for how I treat my family even if there is no one else there to watch me.  Growing a proper fear of the Lord and a burning love for Him and deepening my knowledge of Him will help to change me from the inside out.  Worship changes you from the inside out rather than just trying to change your behavior on your own strength!  How freeing that is!  It means that I don't have to be the kind of mom that I don't want to be.  I can be the kind of wife that God wants me to be. 

Now before you say, wow! she has it all together, I admit that this is a discipline I have not developed yet, and if there were a hidden camera in my house you probably won't yet see the fruit of this.  But I have prayed and pleaded that God would help me to do this:  To take my focus off myself and to fix my eyes on my Savior, on how glorious and amazing He is.  I am trusting Him to be faithful as I do what I now know to do.

Blessings!

-J

As the new year of seminary started, I was honored to be asked to give a testimony about what God has done in my life since coming to seminary two years ago.  Here are portions of my "speech" from last week.

Whatever God has called you to do (wife, marriage, homeschooling, ministry), He is faithful to give you the strength, power and the time to do it.  We need to constantly remember to be obedient to the areas where His will is clear and seek after His will, trusting that He will take care of the details.  Here's just a sampling of the promises scripture gives us of this:

Cast your cares on the Lord and He will sustain you; He will never let the righteous fall.  Ps 55:22

Listen to me, O house of Jacob, all you who remain in the house of Israel, you whom I have upheld since you were conceived, and have carried since your birth.  Even to your old age and gray hairs I am He, I am He who will sustain you.  I have made you and I will carry you; I will sustain you and I will rescue you.  Is 46:3-4

So then, brothers, stand firm and hold to the teachings we passed on to you, whether by word of mouth or by letter.  May our Lord Jesus Christ Himself and God our Father, who loved us and by His grace gave us eternal encouragement and good hope, encourage your hearts and strengthen you in every good deed and word. 2 Thess 2:15-17

Because of the Lord's great love we are not consumed, for His compassions never fail.  They are new every morning; great is Your faithfulness.  I say to myself, "The Lord is my portion; therefore I will wait for Him."  The Lord is good to those whose hope is in Him, to the one who seeks Him; it is good to wait quietly for the salvation of the Lord." Lam 3:22-26

-J

I have been venturing out of the "seminary bubble" we've enjoyed for the past two years - a place where most families homeschool and compared to others I "only " have 4 kids!  I have had several conversations in the past month with moms from different walks of life who were intrigued that I homeschooled.  I found that the same question keeps coming up - "So your kids listen to you and do what you say?"  At first, I wasn't sure how to answer that question because, if I am honest, my kids don't always listen to me and they aren't always happy to do their schoolwork(gasp!).  But it is the expectation that they would listen to me and there are consequences when they don't.

Warning - I think I'm about to get on a soapbox.  How far have our standards come?  First off, I am not one of those people who believe that everyone should be homeschooling.  Each family needs to prayerfully decide what suits each individual family and child.  But more people definitely could be and maybe even should be.  But regardless of what your schooling choice is, God's Word is clear!  Children are to obey their parents in the Lord for this is RIGHT!(Eph 6:1).  It is the first commandment with a promise - that it will go well with the child and they may enjoy long life on the earth.  The main excuse for many of these women for not schooling at home is that their children will not listen to them.  Unfortunately, if that's truly the case (and for some of them it really is as I witnessed) they have much bigger worries than their child's academics!  Jesus even set the example for this.  Being fully God, He chose to submit Himself under His parent's authority as a child(what a breeze that must have been for Mary & Joseph - and a source of contempt for His siblings!).  Children need to learn to obey because it is dangerous(physcially, emotionally and spiritually) if they don't.  I have been convicted in my own heart to press on, to not get lazy in this area (while always being seasoned with love and grace, of course).  We recently watched a series of DVD's by Ted Tripp and Paul David Tripp called The Case for Kids that helped us to once again look at the Biblical princples of scripture and apply them to our lives.  I highly recommend them.

What a sad state of affairs - both for the children who will eventually have a difficult time submitting to the authority of the Lord and His Word, but also for the parents whose relationships with their children will never be what God has intended.  I pray for these families that I have met - that they would see that the answers for the strife in their household is in God's Word. And I pray for my own family, that we would expect first time obedience, that we would not grow weary in training our children, and that it would go well with them so that they may enjoy long life on the earth. 

Blessings!

-J

I am currently reading Lou Priolo's book, The Heart of Anger:  Practical Help for the Prevention and Cure of Anger in Children.    It is amazing for anyone who struggles with anger - if you are a homeschooling mom (or probably any mom!) you probably fit this category -  though it is directed towards how to help angry children.  It has so much practical and Biblical wisdom   I have been convicted of the anger in my own heart and am taking steps to address it, I have been convicted of the sin in my life that can lead to my children's anger and I will hopefully be able to assist my children in learning how to biblically handle their anger so that they don't have to re-teach habits when they are in their 30's!   The best thing is that it gives me hope and reassurance that the Bible does indeed have the answers to "everything pertaining to life and godliness".  So I highly recommend it and I have only read through Chapter 7!  I will try to go into more detail as I am able to get my thoughts together, but had to share!

-J

"Teach us to number our days, that we may present to You a heart of wisdom." Psalm 90:12

This morning I had the opportunity to listen to Family Life on the radio.   I haven't had time to listen to them much since I started homeschooling, but they were of tremendous encouragement to me when I started the journey as a stay at home mom.  So since we are on vacation from schooling, I listened this morning.  They were talking to an author who wrote a book on living without regrets. 

The above verse was quoted during the show and I've been meditating on it all morning.  We will have a heart of wisdom when we learn how short life is.  We hear this all the time, usually when someone dies.  The premise of this man's book is that we should live our life in such a way that we won't have regrets later on.  If you want to be a certain type of parent, do it now instead of waiting.  Schedule times to teach and have fun with your children.  If you feel called to ministry, set goals to do it.  What also struck me in this verse is that the ability to do this comes from God - He will teach us to number are days and He helps to make us wise when we ask for it.  We cannot do this in and of ourselves.  It reminds me of the following verses:

James 1:5 - "But if any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God, who gives to all generously and without reproach and it will be given to him." 

Proverbs 2:1-7(Notice God's role and our role in gaining wisdom) - "My son, if you will receive my words and treasure my commandments within you, make your ear attentive to wisdom and incline your heart to understanding; For if you cry for discernment, lift your voice for understanding; If you seek her as silver and search for her as for hidden treasures; Then you will discern the fear of the Lord and discover the knowledge of God.  For the Lord Gives wisdom; from His mouth come knowledge and understanding."  So we have to do our part to become wise, but ultimately it is a gift from from God to be discovered and prayed for. 

On the show, they spoke of a man who had a jar of marbles on his desk that were the number of weekends he had with his son until his son graduated from high school.  It helped him keep in proper persepective that his time with his son was short and should not be wasted.  I grabbed a calculator and realized that I have just over 4000 days until girl7 (Lord willing) turns 18.  It sounds like a lot, but I am so amazed that she's already 7.5 (2700+ days) that I can only imagine how quicky that time will pass.  4000 days to teach her about placing Jesus first in her life and that her goal in life is to glorify God.  4000 days to teach her the disciplines she will need in her life and a love of learning.  4000 days to be with her and enjoy just watching her become the woman God has created her to be.  When people ask why I homeschool, this is one of the main reasons.  We have such a limited time to pass on to the next generation all that they need, that the thought of them being away from home for the majority of that time (2100+ days) just doesn't make as much sense as it once did.  (Not saying that we will for sure homeschool all the way through; we will always be in prayer over this, but you get my point.) 

Now, of course things still need to get done - laundry, cleaning, meals, etc. and they do sometimes have to be the priorities, but I need to be focused on the right goal and keep perspective.

So today I pray that God would teach me to number my days so that I might present to Him a heart of wisdom.  I pray for wisdom in how I use my time I have with my family and all those I love.  I pray that I will use the vapor of time God has given me on earth to do the things and have the agendas that are on His heart.    As I realize that God is the only source of true wisdom, I pray that He would help me to receive His Word, treasure His commandments, seek wisdom as I would seek silver and that I would discern the fear of the Lord.   I thank Him for this time I have with my children and the opportunity I have to homeschool them.  I pray that I would not take it for granted or forget that it IS a priviledge.  I pray this in Jesus precious name without whom I would have no right to even ask for these things.

-J

In my ladies bible study at our church, I recently taught on the topic of God's Will "borrowing" much of John MacArthur's sermon titled Found: God's Will.  One of the areas that really convicted me was from Ephesians 5:17-18(NIV):  "Therefore, do not be foolish, but understand what the Lord's will is.  Do not get drunk on wine, which leads to debauchery.  Instead, be filled with the Spirit."  Why did Paul compare being drunk to being filled with the Spirit?  Because the issue is control.  The word filled in the Greek has the idea of filling in a controlling sense, like wind filling the sails of a ship moving it along.  So it's telling us to allow ourselves to be controlled and totally dominated by the Spirit.  Paul compares this to being drunk because when a person is drunk they are no longer under control themselves, but under the control of alcohol.  So I've been really praying and asking God to help me to be dominated by His Word(which is from His Spirit) and to help me to pay attention to what the Spirit leads. 

All that to tell this story.  WARNING - THE FOLLOWING STORY DOES NOT MAKE ME LOOK LIKE A VERY GOOD MOTHER!!!  Some dear seminary friends invited us to tag along on their vacation to Legoland for a couple days.  Normally, this would be an easy one to say no to strictly because of the finances involved, but this was a special homeschool day and the passes were going to only be $17.  They had planned to stay in a hotel nearby overnight.  It sounded so much fun that I couldn't wait to go.  I applied for our homeschool coupon, but no matter how many times I did it, it never sent me the e-mail with the coupon on it(a necessity to get the significant discount).  So I determined, that if we were to go, the coupon would show up in my Inbox.  Well it didn't. 

BW happened to notice, though, when he got his haircut at Supercuts that they had some Legoland coupons where if you buy an adult ticket, your child got in free.  When he did the math, it would only be $20 more than if we got the homeschool coupon.  So he said to go ahead and book the hotel. 

I went online to expedia, travelocity, etc and found that most places want to charge you two rooms when you have a family as big as ours.  But I persevered and "fudged" the number of kids I had to make the reservation.  Two days before we were to go, I got an e-mail that they hadn't heard back from the hotel and our reservation had not gone through.  So I went directly onto the hotel's website, chose to do the "right" thing and order two adjoining rooms(little more expensive, of course). 

Now, I must also point out that Girl7 and I had the stomach flu on Monday (another post would have to be made for the long story about how we got the flu) and BW got it on Wednesday, but I was STILL planning to go!  Thursday night, the night before we were going to leave, BW thought it would be fun to take the kids to Coldstone since Girl7 had received a gift card.  After dinner, we got everyone's shoes on and went out to the van.  As we drove down the driveway, we could hear "bump-bump".  We pulled over to discover that my rear passenger tire was completely flat.  It was 7:00 at night.

Ever persevering(and not taking God's hints), I called Costco and Wal-Mart knowing that they might be open late.  BW explained that even if they were open it would still take time to put the spare on and we would not be able to get it there by closing. 

I went to bed, thinking that BW could get up early, get the van into the tire shop by 7:30, we could be on the road by 9:00 at the latest and be at Legoland by lunchtime.  Around 3am, I woke up to the sound of my 18mo throwing up in his crib.  As we cleaned him off, I thought, well, he'll bounce back and be able to sleep it off in the car. 

We got up, Boy18mo ate a full breakfast and I started packing while BW bought a new tire.  He came back and we loaded up the car.  As we strapped them in their carseats, Boy6 said "Mom, my stomach doesn't feel so good."  He proceeded to throw up too! 

BW & I looked at each other.  We both had the gleam in our eyes like Chevy Chase in the Vacation movies - "We were on a quest.  A quest for fun."  Nothing was going to stop us.  We packed some extra towels, gave Boy6 some anti-nausea meds and set off for a day of fun?!?!?!

Then, just as we were about an hour into the trip, Boy18mo started crying and proceeded to ...well, I won't gross you out with details, but it was not a pretty scene.  Of course, we were not in a desireable neighborhood, but the car had to stop.  It was at this point that we both finally resigned ourselves that we just were not meant to go on this trip.  We called the hotel and ended up with a partial refund.  We called our friends and told them we were not coming.  Then the tears began in the backseat from the healthy girls who could not immediately understand why their brothers would not enjoy a day of roller coasters on an upset stomach.  I felt like crying myself, but mostly because I was reflecting on the fact that I had not allowed the Spirit to lead me throughout the entire planning process.  I was trying to do what I wanted and ignoring everything else along the way. 

The next day, what should arrive in the mail, but 3 FREE tickets to 6 Flags.  What I had forgotten in my quest for fun was that the kids had earned Free tickets (and 1 teacher ticket) for a school reading program earlier this year.  So it wasn't that God was denying my children of fun - He had a better, more economical plan in mind(one that didn't require a hotel room, or the cost of tickets, etc). 

One of these days I will get it through my thick head that God's plan is so much better than my own plans.  "Woe to the obstinate children, declares the Lord, to those who carry out plans that are not mine." Is 30:1.  "Delight yourself in the Lord and He will give you the desires of your heart."(Ps 37:4) "Commit your way to the Lord; trust in Him." Ps 37:5 "Be still before the Lord and wait patiently for Him."Ps 37:7

Oh, that I would entrust myself to the Lord in EVERYTHING, to His control and guidance, beleiveing that He can care for me and my family much better than I can.

-J

So I have really been stressing with my kids and showing them scripture that teaches the Golden Rule: Treat others as you would want to be treated.  There unfortunately seem to be no shortage of real life examples as we go through the day of times when they have not treated one another the way that they would want to be treated and in a way that would please God. 

But reflecting in my own heart, I had to ask myself:  Do I treat them the way I would want to be treated?  Do I treat them the way I want them to treat one another?  Do I treat them the way I expect them to treat me?  Do I even treat them as well as I would treat a stranger or someone else's kids?  Glaring, convicting answer to all of these questions is NO. 

Then, I received some teaching last night from Deuteronomy 6, a very familiar parenting passage:  "You shall teach them diligently to your sons and shall talk of them when you sit in your house and when you walk by the way and when you lie down and when you rise up."  We looked at the verses just before, verses that I quote to my kids often:   You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your might.  These words, which I am comanding you today shall be ON YOUR HEART."  I am unable to teach my kids what I am not doing in my own life.  The words and teaching need to be on my heart and in my life FIRST!  My heart also needs to reflect my love for Christ.  Christ tells us that if we love Him we will obey Him.  I have to admit that many times I neglect a teachable moment or an "opportunity" to discipline my children because I am being lazy and my comfort is more important to me at that moment than doing what would please God.  Not a coincidence at all that my children struggle with this too. 

So my prayer is that I would love the Lord with all my heart and with all my sould and with all my heart.  I pray that I would be diligent to hear, read, study and meditate on His Word and that it would seep deep into my heart.  I pray that I would love God so much that I would desire to obey Him, especially in the areas of parenting and being a good witness to my children.  I pray also that I would love my children as I love myself and treat them the way that I would want them to treat me, one another and any other neighbor they come into contact with.  I thank God for His Word that is so powerful to teach and change and that He is gracious to entrust these young souls to me.

Grace & peace,

-J

Dandelion Seeds is starting the New Year with a Colossal Clutter Cleanup starting next week.  I was almost sickened as we were moving with the sheer amount of STUFF I have.  Hoping this will help me to let go of some things.  If you can't find anything in your house, you might benefit from her challenge!

I have always loved the New Year.  It's always been fun for me to get a new calendar (I'm an organiztional nut who loves organizing materials but isn't always very organized, can anyone relate?) and go through my old calendar to put in birthdays, anniversaries and remember all that I had done the previous year.  I also like the feeling of reflecting on the past year but starting fresh and making goals.

This year is no exception.  In reflecting on last year, I can see some very dark times but can also see God's sovereign plan and how He has used it to change me and mold me (Romans 8:28-28) in ways I really wouldn't have otherwise.  I am really learning to take the focus off myself and what I had wanted or planned for my life and truly placing my life into the Lord's hands.  I am so far from doing this perfectly but I have seen enough "glimpses" now at God in action that I trust that He knows far more about what is best for me and my family than I do. 

As far as New Year's resolutions go, I am committing to memorizing scripture and surrounding my family with God's Word in everything that I possibly can.  I have never been one for really focusing on this discipline in my Christian life.  I'd tell myself that I didn't have time or I wasn't good at memorizing or why memorize what I can just read.  But I have had enough instances in the recent past where I made a different choice or decision because God's Word was in my heart to instruct me and guide me that I really see it's value in a way I hadn't before.  This became even more powerful to me when I recently had the opportunity to counsel a friend in distress.  It was awesome to be able to quote God's promises to her and to pray for her using God's Word.  What a feeling of freedom that I didn't need to come up with something profound to comfort her on my own! 

I also just finished a wonderful book called Teach them Diligently: How to use the scriptures in child training by Lou Priolo.  He quoted a familiar scripture of Deut 6:6-9:  And these words, which I am commanding you today, shall be on your heart; and you shall teach them diligently to your sons and shall talk of them when you sit in your house and when you walk by the way and when you lie down and when you rise up. And you shall bind them as a sign on your hand and they shall be as frontals on your forehead.  And you shall write them on the doorposts of your house and on your gates."  I had heard this verse so many times before but he pointed out that it says these words shall be on YOUR(MY) heart.  How can they be on my children's heart, how can I teach them to my children, if they are not on my heart first? 

One of the things that BW & I have learned, from seminary and from our own experiences, is a student usually will not grow or learn more than their teacher knows about a given topic.  BW noticed this as a public school math teacher.  Many public school elementary teachers he met hated math and never really understood it and often passed that on to their students.  (Have to admit I even see that trend in my homeschooling - thank God that there is a former math teacher in the family)  In the same way,  a church can only really learn and grow as much as the pastor has learned and grown.  Being at John MacArthur's church for the past year and a half, we met so many people who really have a seminary level knowledge of God's Word just from sitting under this man's(and many other well trained pastors) teaching over the years.  And likewise, my children(and any  "spiritual children" I/we may disciple in the future) will only be able to know as much about our Lord as I am able to impress on their heart from my own knowledge of God.  This has really convicted and motivated me to use this year to deepen my memorization and understanding of God's Word. 

My plan is to put my memory verses on 3X5 cards that I will refer to during my quiet time and then take along with me so that when if I am waiting somewhere I can flip through them.  I am also going to keep track of the verses that the kids have learned through Awana and our own family devotionals so that we can help them to continually refresh their own memories of God's Word. 

Now that I have one child who is able to actually read the Bible herself.  I am planning to help her learn how to start studying God's word by doing a weekly Bible study with her.  I will be using some of the ideas from Polished Cornerstones by Doorposts to go through Proverbs 31 and she can see how scriptures apply even to her own 7 year old life.  I also want to memorize scripture that can be used to correct my children so that they can see what the Bible says about their behavior and we can pray together for God to help them. 

My quiet time this year is going to be from The MacArthur Daily Bible  and I hope to be able to have come close to reading the Bible in 2007 though I will admit that I am going to be striving more for understanding than for quantity of reading so I may not.  This morning all of what I wrote above was confirmed once again when I read this psalm:

Blessed is the man who walks not in the counsel of the ungodly, nor stands in the path of sinners, nor sits in the seat of the scornful.  But his delight is int he law of theLord, and in His law he meditates day and night.  He shall be like a tree planted by the rivers of water, that brings forth its fruit in its season, whose leaf shall not wither, and whatever he does shall prosper.   Ps 1:1-3 NKJV 

May God richly bless you in 2007!

-J

A friend sent this to me and it  helped me to slow down a little.  Hope it does the same for you!  Merry Christmas(I promise pictures & updates will come soon.  Moving has kept me a little busier than I had thought)

If I decorate my house perfectly with plaid bows,
strands of twinkling lights and shiny balls,
but do not show love to my family,
I'm just another decorator.

If I slave away in the kitchen,
baking dozens of Christmas cookies,
preparing gourmet meals and arranging
a beautifully adorned table at mealtime:
I'm just another cook.

If I work at a soup kitchen,
carol in the nursing home,
and give all that I have to charity;
but do not show love to my family,
it profits me nothing.

If I trim the spruce with shimmering angels
and crocheted snowflakes,
attend a myriad of holiday parties
and sing in the choir's cantata
but do not focus on Christ,
I have missed the point.

Love stops the cooking to hug the child.
Love sets aside the decorating to kiss the spouse.
Love is kind, though harried and tired.
Love does not envy another's home
that has coordinated Christmas china and table linens.

Love does not yell at the kids to get out of the way,
but is thankful they are there to be in the way.
Love does not give only to those who are able
to give in return; but rejoices in giving
to those who cannot.

Love bears all things,
believes all things,
hopes all things, and endures all things.
Love never fails.

Video games will break,
pearl necklaces will be lost,
golf clubs will rust,
but giving the gift of love will endure.

*--Author Unknown*

BW was picking the brain of one of his seminary friends the other day.  This family is very large by today's standards and very close, generous and loving and the children are walking with the Lord.  So BW asked this father what were his biggest pieces of advice for childrearing.  The father said that a wise family that they had asked the same question to many years ago gave them these recommendations and they have tried to follow them.  I wanted to record them here for the benefit of those who read this, but mostly for myself as I strive to do these things.

1.  Cry out to the Lord constantly for the childrens' salvation and for wisdom for each individual situation that arises.

2.  For every negative comment/discipline make sure that there are 10 positive ones.  I read somewhere a while back(maybe it was on someone's blog!) to keep a tally of positive to negative comments for a few days to check your status in this area(also not a bad idea for your marriage too!).  I have to admit that at the time I didn't do it because I knew full well what it would reveal.  This is something I really plan to work on fervently in the New Year.

3.  Study about the character of God in His patience and longsuffering.  Remind yourself of God's patience with you and have that humility and that kind of patience with your children.  I know that in my life, I am so thankful that God does not unleash his wrath on me every single time I disobey him or I would have been struck by lightning long ago.  He also doesn't refrain from disciplining me, but He is so incredibly patient and longsuffering.  And there are so many times that He blesses me even when I don't deserve it.  He often also uses the natural consequences of my poor choices to discipline me and draw me close to Him again.

So these, in a nutshell, are my going to be my New Year's "Parenting" resoultions.  What are yours?

-J

On the way home from church on Sunday we drove the "long way home" so that all 4 kids would fall asleep and take a little nap.  When we were almost home, AK(5) woke up.  He doesn't wake up like a "normal" person - stretches and slowly wakes up.  He begins talking right away.  So one second all 4 kids are sleeping and then all of a sudden we hear this voice from the back of the van:

AK:  Mom & Dad, you know what?

Me:  What, AK?

AK:  From now on, I am not going to be naughty or do anything wrong and I'm going to be nice to my sisters and I'm not going to be selfish or complain about anything and I'm going to do my chores right away and I'm going to behave and obey and I'm just going to be good all the time.

Dad:  Wow, AK!  Well, that's pretty hard to do and we will help you as much as we can.

Short Silence

AK:  Mom, what are we having for dinner tonight?

Me:  Chicken

AK:  Awww, maaaannn! I don't like chicken.  Why do we always have to have chicken?  I wanted to have hamburgers tonight.  We never have what I want to have.

Think that will make it into one of BW's sermons one day?  We had a nice laugh about it, but doesn't that just sum up so much of our Christian walk - especially when we try to make resolutions to give up sin on our own strength instead of leaning on God to help us?  "For the good that I want, I do not do, but I practice the very evil that I do not want...For I joyfully concur with the law of God in the inner man, but I see a different law in the members of my body, waging war against the law of my mind and making me a prisoner of the law of sin which is in my members.  Wretched man(or woman) that I am!  Who will set me free from the body of this death?  Thanks be to God through Jesus Christ our Lord!(Romans 7:19, 22-24 NASB) 

The christian life is a constant war against sin and we cannot put our faith in our own willpower.  One of the things I am learning is that one of the marks of a true christian is someone who struggles with their sin but hates their sin and is working with God to deal with it.  I thank God that the only remedy for sin is Christ and I praise Him that despite my many failures, I AM changing daily and becoming more like Christ(Rom 8:29).  I am so grateful and thankful for how much He has changed me even though so often it seems I have so far to go.  But if I allow myself a second to look back at the person I was I am so encouraged and know that He promises that He who began a good work in me will perfect it until the day of Christ Jesus.(Phil 1:6).  I am sure it will take at least that long:)  Have a great day!

-J

-J

http://organizedchristmas.com/ccweekly.html

A friend from my homeschool group recommended this Christmas oganizer site.  You can print their 6-week Christmas organizer. The 6 weeks go from Oct. 22-Dec. 2, so you will be done in plenty of time to enjoy your holidays. You will find tons of organizational articles, thorough and detailed to-do lists (such as "plan family photo session" and "schedule carpet cleaning" and "set up gift wrap area"), and great printable lists and planning sheets.

Happy planning!

-J

I love to read and generally  have one or two books going at any one time.  Lately, though, between books I've been given and books I have bought it's getting  a little ridiculous - even for me.

Here's what I is in my reading basket currently and hoping to get through this Fall(in addition to my daily devotion Praying throught the Bible in One Year by Cheri Fuller.  It has taken me way over a year, but I'm getting closer to having actually reading through the whole Bible).  I also try to pick out another pleasure book when we are at the library so that the kids see me picking out fun reading too:

One with a Shepherd:  The Tears and Triumphs of a Ministry Marriage by Mary Somerville.  Mrs. Somerville is now a professor's wife at BW's seminary after being a pastor's wife for 35 years and I have had the privilege of hearing her speak.  I really can't wait to get into this one.  I am told it is a must for any pastor's wife.

Loving God with all Your Mind by Elizabeth George.  I started this last night and couldn't put it down.  This is a great book for anyone who struggles with depression, anxiety or worry as she teaches you how to to train your thoughts and take every thought captive. 

Teach Them Diligently:  How to use the Scriptures in Child Training by Lou Priolo.  Haven't started this one yet, but it looks awesome. 

Everyday Talk:  Talking Freely and Naturally about God with your Children by John A. Younts.  This book has helped to remind me that I can lead my kids into a greater awareness of the presence and glory of God in the things we do everyday, not just during scheduled "devotion" time.

Shepherding a Child's Heart by Ted Tripp which I refer to all the time.  I'm in the middle of reading it for the third time and I always gain added insight when I read it.

9 Marks of a Healthy Church by Mark Dever.   This book is an assigned book for one of BW's Pastoral Ministry classes that I picked up one day and couldn't put down.  Dever explains what expository preaching is and why it is so vital for the church today.

Seeking God:  How to develop an intimate, spiritual relationship by Richard Mayhue.  This is another one of BW's assigned books.  I started reading it because Mrs. "B" Mayhue is my group leader in my seminary wives discipleship, but have continued reading it because of the great wisdom in this book.

A Christain Leader's Guide to Leading with Love by Alexander Strauch.   This was given to BW and all the seminary students in the past week.  It provides an understanding of what the Bible teaches about love to help ministry leaders improve relational skills, diminish conflict, etc. 

Redeeming Love:  A Novel by Francine Rivers.  This was lent to me by a good friend who said that it is such a fun novel to read.  It's a retelling of the book of Hosea in novel form.  Haven't started reading it because she warned it's a page turner and I know that life is going to get in the way of turning the pages!

10 Questions to Diagnose Your Spiritual Health by Don Whitney.  I don't actually have this one yet, but have been told that my seminary wives group will be going through it together in the next month or so. 

Attributes of God by Arthur W. Pink.  This one has been on my sidebar practically since I started my blog and I am determined to get through it one of these days. It was given to me by our Fellowship Pastor and it seems that everywhere I turn someone is recommending it to me.  It was written in the early part of the 20th century by a man much more intelligent than myself and his style of writing is way over my head in some cases.  I may need to go through this one with BW so he can translate it for me. 

I am often asked how I find time to read while homeschooling, housework and supporting a husband and 4 kids(and a ministry at some point).  To be honest, I'm not totally sure myself.  In fact, this is one of the reasons I have so many books piling up on me!!!!!!!!  I take little opportunities while the kids are watching a movie or napping, at night before bed, while taking care of "business" in the bathroom, etc.  I am also hoping once I have more than just one child reading to schedule a time of silent reading for an hour or so in our day.  I want the kids to see that we as parents read for pleasure and hopefully help them to find pleasure in it too.

-J

Yesterday was my birthday and my dh surprised me with a CD of Keith & Krysten Getty.  They are Irish contemporary christian music/hymn writers.  They led worship at our church a few weeks ago and were just amazing.   If you ever get a chance to see them in person, I highly recommend it.  A few of the songs consistently bring me to tears including In Christ Alone and the The Power of the Cross.  I woke the kids up today to See What a Morning.  What a blessing!  Enjoy!

-J

Below is the testimony that I shared in front of the church: 

I am here tonight to glorify God by sharing the changes he has made in my life. I was baptized as an infant in the Catholic church and attended Catholic schools through high school. From that experience, I believed there was a God and I knew Jesus had died on the cross for my sins, but never really understood what dying on a cross had to do with sins. God seemed far away and uninterested in individuals. The Bible seemed to be out of date, full of fairytale-like stories that could never really happen scientifically and definitely was not applicable to my modern way of life. I believed that my sin would be weighed at the end of my life and if I had done more good things than bad, I should be able to go to heaven. I looked to the approval of others, material things and my career to satisfy me.  In my heart I knew that as I accumulated things and received praise from the world it was never enough and no matter how I tried to control the people in my life they could not make me feel whole. 

When I met my husband in college, who had been raised Lutheran, we had committed to attending church as that was how we were both raised.  It was easier for me to become Lutheran than for him to become Catholic so we started our search for Lutheran churches. Through God’s sovereignty we were introduced to a pastor who was starting a church plant that was going to be meeting at a school down the street from our new house. Soon we joined a bible study and made some wonderful friendships with people who were passionate about being Christian and loving Jesus. I began to read the Bible for the first time in my life and was amazed at how practical it could be and that it did apply to my life today. For the first time I was really learning WHY Jesus had to die for our sins. I realized that no matter how good I tried to be, God was so holy that I could never be good enough to earn my way to heaven.  Jesus had paid the price for all my sins and I just needed to accept the gift he had suffered so painfully to give to me.  Romans 5:8 says that "God demonstrated His love toward us, in that while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us".  God had never been far away.  He was closer than I ever could have imagined, had created me and knew about me from the beginning of time and He desired for me to share eternal life with Him.  I honestly do not know the exact moment of my salvation, but I do know that over the course of several years God was drawing me to Himself.  I had a hunger for the things of God, to be in a community of believers and read His Word.  I felt convicted about doing certain things because I knew that they would not please Him.  Proverbs 19:21 says “Many are the plans of a man’s heart, but it is the Lord’s purpose that prevails.”  My plans and desires changed and the things I had always wanted and had been pursuing for my life (a career and material possessions) were taken or given up as I began to live my life for God rather than for myself.  Gradually and lovingly God revealed His plan for my life as a stay at home wife and mother to 4 beautiful children.  In a short time my husband & I were both in leadership positions at our church plant. Though I couldn’t really see it at the time, our church began to transition from bible studies to Christian bestsellers.  I received and then began to teach the message that God’s purpose and plan was to bless me.  I was taught about a God that wanted to bless me financially, heal my past hurts, provide me with spiritual gifts and in general keep me from a life of pain, stress or sadness.  When we needed to counsel people in the church who were suffering consequences from their sin or could not understand why God had given them a trial we were not really able to counsel them.  I am eternally grateful that God granted my husband the wisdom to see that our church was not following biblical principles in many areas.  I wish I could say that I willingly and wholeheartedly agreed with him, but I didn’t.  Although I still didn’t really understand what the big deal was, I knew God had called us to His service and agreed to leave our church and home to move here so that my husband could attend the Master’s Seminary.  It was a very difficult time for me as we lost the support of our pastor and many members of our church when we chose to come here and I questioned my husband and God frequently.  But God has shown Himself faithful in so many ways.  In the past year through sitting under the teaching of Pastor MacArthur and Pastor Shannon, receiving counsel in the seminary wives discipleship and my husband’s enduring patience and love, my view of God has changed.  My eyes have been opened to the fact that scripture teaches that my focus needs to be on pleasing and glorifying God in all that I do and live a life of obedience to Him out of gratefulness for what He has done for me.  God is using both my trials and my blessings to mold me to become more like Christ.  I am finding that as I trust in the Lord and strive to please Him, He is changing me into a person only He knew I could be.  

I desire now to faithfully obey God and trust His will for my life though I am far from carrying this out perfectly and still have so much to learn. I believe Gal 2:20 says it best:  “I have been crucified with Christ, and it is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me and the life which I now live I live by faith in the Son of God who loved me and gave Himself up for me.”  It is with an obedient and grateful heart that I am here tonight to be baptized as an outward symbol of the changes He has made in me..

-J