What is this stuff?  The sky is crying!  The ground is soaked, the air is fresh, the clouds are covering and hiding the sun.  In SEPTEMBER???  In the DESERT???  It's terribly out of the ordinary.  It is sooooooooo refreshing.  Sometimes we need that don't we?

I wonder if we need it in our personal lives.  I wonder if sometimes we need to totally 'bust out' of our normal routines and give our families and ourselves a refreshing change.  Whether it's a new music CD, a special dinner, a game we haven't played before or just in a long time, or the living room re-arranged or decorated for a holiday or season.

I wonder if we need a 'day off' from time to time.  Some employers have 'personal days' instead of 'sick days'.  Employees can use their 'sick days' for whatever they choose.  A doctor visit, a trip to the airport, or a funeral can use a 'personal day' rather than using precious 'vacation time'.

Since mothers, and especially homeschooling mothers, rarely get TRUE days off... or even true VACATION days... (who plans, packs, arranges, orders, unpacks, regroups, and keeps it all going in the background???)..... perhaps they need to take a 'personal' day from time to time. 

Instead of frittering away days because we need to refuel, perhaps we need to consciously take that day off.  Buy frozen waffles, frozen burritos or make pbj sandwiches, gather up some snacks, a few good movies, and if possible, a sweet homeschooled teenager to keep the kidlets occupied and disappear.

Even if we can't leave home, we CAN go into our room, close the door, and escape into a good book, a good CD, or a good movie.  Rearrange the room, change the sheets, dust the windowsills... whatever it takes to refresh your spirit.  Listen to some uplifting music, read the Psalms, and watch the world go by. 

While I'm pregnant, I have a little ritual.  I read all of my favorite parenting books, my favorite homeschooling books, my favorite books on home and family and organizing... it becomes like my own personal cheerleading squad.  After Ethan was born, it was a good 4 years before I got pg again.  For four years I didn't have that 'renewal'.  For four years, I was running on fumes.

When I discovered I was pg with Lorna, I realized that I needed the refresher course.  My desire to study picked up.  My desire to learn and to do a better, more efficient and exciting job was rekindled.  I can already feel that eagerness starting to wan.  Lorna is a year old.  It's been a year and a half since I got recharged that way.  I need that 'bracing' that only a few hours reading can give me.

If I want to absorb all of the beauty of life, I must also absorb the order and the realities of life.  Order.  Work.  Color.  Taste.  Scents.  Textures.  Routines.  All of these little things add up to a refreshed and beautiful life.

Living a Beautiful Life by Alexandra Stoddard.  This book was recommended to me as I began this little journey of mine.  I frankly didn't think I'd enjoy it much and half heartedly checked eBay to see how much a copy would be.  Imagine my surprise when there were several, in stores, for a BIN price of .99.  I knew.  I just KNEW that this meant the book would be about as inspiring to me as a dead lilac bush.  Because my paypal balance was healthy enough to cover the 3 dollars the book would cost with shipping, I opted to buy it.  Who knows, there could be a nugged tucked away inside the thing right?

The book arrived yesterday.  I took one look at the picture on the back and groaned audibly.  My husband looked at me oddly as if to say, "Why did you buy it if it is that distasteful."  In my defense, I  had a horrible day yesterday.  Honestly, it was one of the worst days I've had in a long time.  As my blog so bluntly states, I failed.  I have created a huge mess for a bunch of people due to my failure.  Seeing something that looked so uninspiring just sent me over the edge.  But, I packed up the last of the box I needed to ship, I grabbed my keys, took the boxes to the PO, went to see a movie, came home, grabbed the book, and settled in at the computer.

I chatted with friends for a time but the snippets I was reading in the first chapter drew me.  I started typing quotes in the messenger boxes.  We began discussing what she had to say.  I noticed that I was giving them the title of the book and the author's name and the price on eBay.  I was strongly suggesting (ok ok... demanding!) that they get one, or get it from the library, or something!.

I am now half way through this marvelous book.  Honestly, I could have stopped at the first chapter.  While there are good things on almost every page, much of the book either doesnt' apply to me, my life, or my interests.  While she may delight in opening her fridge and seeing fresh flowers, I dont' get into mine enough to consider the expense worth the 'delight' as I open the doors.  I'd rather find a magnetic bud vase and put a small one on the OUTSIDE of the door.  Better yet, get me a suction cup bud vase and I'll spruce up this monitor instead!

However, ther are a few things she said, in that first chapter, that I'd like to quote.  Whet your appetite for what I think the book REALLY is trying to inspire.  (And does so well.)

"I've observed in my communications with people all over the world, the tendency so many of us have to concentrate our energies on things that are for special occasions rather than on things we do, or use, every day.  In design terms, this translates into working to get the living room just right, instead of concentrating on the rooms we spend the most time in, day after day- the kitchen, bedroom, bathroom.  This 5-percent rule translates into a tendency to save up a sense of the special for a few outstanding events each year- for a particular party, anniversary, or birthday celebration, a vacation.  Such events comprise at the most, 5 percent of our living time , and the remaining 95-percent is often merely walked through, in wistful anticipation of some later joy.  But what we all really want to do, I think, is live in the present, really enjoy every day, not put our lives on hold for that special 5 percent.  We want to enjoy all the days of our lives and especially the time spent in the sanctuary of home.  Life is not a dress rehearsal.

"Instead of rushing through our lives to get somewhere- instead of saving up real living for later- I think it's important to remember that each single day is all we have.  Single days experienced fully add up to a lifetime lived deeply and well.  Today is your life-  not yesterday and not tomorrow.  If we have tomorrow, it will be a gift, but what we do today, right now, will have an accumulate effect on all our tomorrows.  If we make short shrift of our day-to-day lives, even if we are to experience "later," I don't believe we will know fully how to appreciate what we have.  Living well is a habit, and rituals improve and reinforce good life habits.

"That nimble writer of aphorisms Logan Pearsall Smith, in his book All Trivia, said:  'There are two things to aim at in life: first, go get what you want' and, after that, to enjoy it.  Only the wisest of mankind achieve the second.'

"Special events should be exclamation marks in our lives, but ordinary days need to be celebrations too, as meaning and beautiful as the big ones."

This is what I've been aiming for.  This is the goal, the dream, the excitement that I couldn't help sharing.  I hope it uplifts others as well.

"I wanted to live deep and suck out all the marrow of life."   Every time I hear that phrase I kind of get a queasy feeling in my stomach as if good old H.D. was some kind of alien who was taking over bodies or one of Rowling's 'dementors' giving people the dreaded 'kiss'.  However today... I have a new appreciation for it.  He's a man.  I'm a woman.  Sucking 'life' out of something doesn't appeal to me but ABSORBING... inhaling... surrounding.  These are words that I can handle...

So, I want to thank Thoreau.  He really says, in his barbaric way, what I desire so deeply to do.  Not with life alone... just a particular PORTION of life.  The BEAUTY of life.  I am going to revel in, absorb as fully as possible, and enjoy all those little things that make life beautiful.  My little girls hair looking adorable and 'fixed'.  My son looking like a dapper dude with his hair cut consistantly (rather than when I look at him and think... much longer and I could get mini piggies in that mop!)  I'm going to enjoy the flowers of the season, the effect of candle light and the aroma of baking goodies (even if I have to bake them in the crock pot!)

I'm going to quit dressing utilitarian and enjoy being a woman again.  FEMININE... I'm going to quit thinking that practical is a virtue that outshines lovely.  If that were true, God's creation wouldn't be so varied or so breathtaking.

Yes... instead of sucking the BEAUTY out of life... I'm going to do my part to increase the beauty around me.  My front yard is going to become a work of home arts... rather than a reflection of our laziness.  I'm going to quit being afraid to think of what I do, and love as ART.  Homemaking is an ART and I'm going to revel in it. 

I am tired of those in the NEA (not the teacher one, the one of people who should LEARN a thing or two) redefining art to be anything they feel like dragging down to it's basest level.  Once upon a time, art would rarely offend (outside of a nude picture or two).  Now, you're hard pressed to know what it is, or what it signifies, or not to be offended by what it is or signifies.  So, I'm going to teach my children TRUE art appreciation... by not letting my pallete dry up, my canvas get overstretched and torn, and USING them to 'sing my praises' to God's Glory.

I feel better all ready.

Today's touch of beauty... I bought the fall foliage and ripped apart the 'old' wreath, inserted the new folliage, and used the left overs for my pottery pitcher.  I'll put all of these in a plastic container with other 'fall' themed items and switch out for Christmas.  I think it's going to be lovely.  I'm on the hunt for a lovely white dove or a cardinal for Christmas.  I'll eventually have four boxes for fall, christmas, general, and birthdays.  :)  I think this is going to be incredibly fun.