I know I've been blogging about the "technical" details fo Unschooling and how everything is academic in the long run, but as I run around HSB I find so many hearts breaking over teens who are unmotivated and/or not interested in any form of school or learning.  Everything seems to be a battle, and the mom's are in tears. Some even to the point of thinking that Public School is the better option for the difficult teen. My heart is breaking and I cry out to Adonai "No!!! Don't let it happen. It's not the answer."  I can't post individual comments to people I don't know; it would sound so accusatory. So, I'll post my thoughts here and, prayerfully, someone will stop by and read....

I'm no expert, but both my kids  (ages 20 and 16) are thriving and motivated in many different areas.   One is very smart & academic (entering Sr year in college), and the other is very creative and artisic and finishing up "high school".  But we don't struggle like many of these homeschoolers. Why? My only guess is that our goals and methods are different.  Primarily, I don't care that much about academics, so we spend more time doing "HOME" and very little on "SCHOOL". I don't even like the word HomeSchool, because it implies that there is a school in my home.  YUCK! Who wants to be in school 24/7? Not them! Definately not me!   Passing the SATs and entering college is not what I'm training my kids to do. I want them to be faithful to G-d, activite in their community, concerned & caring towards others, and able to meet the requirements for what ever goals or dreams they have for themselves. Memorizing the periodic table of elements will in no way, shape, or form assist them in that endeavor, so why should I make them do it?  Haven't figured that one out yet.

I do however spend time listening TO my kids, and talking WITH them about their heart and their desires. I encourage them to persevere and assist them whenever & wherever I can.  I concentrate on training their heart & soul to delight in the ways of the LORD and I let HIM give them the desire in their heart.  And whatever that desire is, we try to encourage it and spur it on.  Don't get me wrong; they do not get whatever they want and they do not run the house. My children learned to say "No" to worldly things, because they heard Dad & I say "No" to them. But if that spark is not English Literature, Algebra II, or Physics, that's okay.  We'll figure out a way to choose their activities and give it credit for school. Sure, I could have them waste their time checking off 25 novels from someone else's list and forcing/fighting with them to do a 2 paragraph report. But I would rather they read one good book that they love and have them spend half an hour telling me about it while were doing dishes. And all I have to do is take a genuine interest in them.  "What are you reading?" or "What's that about?" will get you alot farther than, "Wirte me a book review by Thursday". Be as interested in what they're doing as you are in how they're doing.

Get them involved in the world and give them a reason to do things. We've done volunteer work at the soup kitchen, worked political campaigns, participated in synagogue actvities, taken co-op classes, learned  a new sport, taken time to make snow angels after a blizzard, and made meals for those in need.   We participate in 4H, take music lessons, and watch documentaries on TV.  We play Cribbage or Skip-Bo during lunch, attend each other's bowling matches or drama performances, and help each other meet their goals. We read stories aloud, talk about growing up, and cry when together when one gets hurt.

I know HS laws are different everywhere, but CO does not have any requirements for graduation: each school (or home) sets their own standards.  In my home, the standard is basically "when we feel you're ready to move on to the next stage of life, or I get sick of teaching you; whichever comes first".  Many of you are thinking "What about Chemistry and Algebra II? What about getting into college?"  They're not in my students' program, unless the student agrees that it should be there to accomplish a goal. I.E. My son needed two science credits to get into college: he got three.  He took Biology from a box, received 1 credit in Agricultural Science for his 4H work, did 1/2 semester of  Astronomy by reading magazines and enjoying our telescope, and 1/2 semester of health just with talks over coffee about grooming, growing up, girls, nutrition, sex, drugs, and rock-n-roll.

I could go on and on and on, but it's getting late.  I just want to encourage you to let them out of the box and trust G-d to take control. Read (or reread) my blog "What Have Flowers to Do with Homeschooling" (link on side bar) and please, if you have a daisy or a chrysanthemum, don't try to force them to be a crocus.  The most beautiful gardens are the ones with many different types of flowers, not just one.

Thanks for the time on the  soap box.  Blessings to you all.