Biblestudy today.  We are to the chapter in Doctrines of Grace that deals with unconditional election.  Boyce points out that God was elective in 3 different generations. He chose Abraham, who, up to the point of his being chosen, worshipped false gods.  Then He chose Isaac when Abraham had 2 sons, only one was the child of promise.  Finally, God chose Jacob over Esau when both of them were born of the same parents, the same line, the same jewishness, if you will.  Why should anyone argue that God couldn't possibly choose some for salvation, and some for ****ation (reprobation).  Romans 9 is so crystal clear.  He has ALWAYS been a God who chooses a people for Himself.  That alone makes me wonder - why me? ... I was just as dead as Madonna or Howard Stern or Charlie Manson.  If Ephesians says that we were dead in our sins, and dead means dead (which it does, I am ALL dead, not mostly dead--which is slightly alive) then God chose me to be one of His children.  I am a part of a chosen group.  Wow.  Why do I not live like that every day? 

It also brought to light how every part of the doctrines of grace work together.  There are no such things as 4 point Calvinists.  I am radically sinful, unable to choose God.  He has to choose me, which He did before the foundations of the Earth, for His glory alone.  The fact that He specifically chose me means that the scope of whose sins the blood of Christ covered are limited to those whom He chose.  Since I wouldn't be able to come to Him, He had to draw me with His irrisitible grace.  And if He went to the work of choosing, drawing and saving me, He will persevere me to the end.  Ok, my head hurts.  Let's do something easy now, like Latin. (comparitively anyway)

By the way.... I showed mercy to my daughter(s) today.  Thanks for praying.