I visited the dentist. Though I was a little reluctant after last times painful experience, I had to inquire about an oddly discolored tooth.

 So we stepped into the dreaded waiting room full of small children, maybe too comfortable chairs, and somewhat outdated magazines.

Standing in line to check in, a very attractive young man walked into the line behind me. I smiled at him, and he smiled back, only to find out 10 minutes later that I had leftover lunch stuck in my teeth. How embarrassing.

Finally, I was called in for X-rays. The lady was nice enough, but she stuck the cardboard thing too far back in my mouth, and then laughed at me for gagging.

Then came the cleaning process. Never in my life has one woman gotten my entire face wet while cleaning my teeth.

Not only was she making the rinsing thing spray up my nose a little, and on my forehead, but immediately after sticking her hand in my mouth to scrape my teeth a little, she would rub it on my cheek.

Upon polishing my teeth, and making me vacuum my mouth for like, 10 minutes, she put floride on them.

Not like, a little dab, just enough for whats needed. She GLOBBED it on. Very generous amounts of the most discgusting flavor known to man. I wanted to projectile vomit all over her teeth, cause it was the only equivilant I could think of, and I was ready to anyways. It seemed reasonable.

Oh oh! And then she actually made my gums BLEED when she was flossing my teeth. I dislike that woman.

Then my actual dentist came in. You know the kind, lets the nurse thingy do all the work, and just comes in for a minute to look at your teeth and probably gets paid a hell of a lot more for it.

This man asked me the most peculiarly formed question. "How are your teeth treating you?"

Did he seriously just ask me this? What does that even mean?!

So I gave him the best answer I knew how.

"Oh, you know. Buys me flowers every once in a while, buys me gifts for our anniversary, typical teeth behavior."

Was I completely off for answering like that? I didn't think so…

Maybe next time he'll think about the way he puts his questions.

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Posted by Spartan117