My passion is to change the world. I want to leave it differently than when I found it. I want people to look at me and see Jesus instead. I don't care to be remembered, but I do care to start a revival. My goal? A life set-apart completely for God, totally and wholly devoted to Him. And Him Alone. My life, and my blog, is about my One Passion in life. Jesus Christ, my Lord and Savior.
I'm going to write a post on cutting soon. I was going to write it tonight, but it's just not to be. I need to get to bed soon.
But, I will say this...
1.)Have you ever cut yourself? (you may PM me if you wish...don't worry your name won't be mentioned in the post)
2.) Why or why not?
3.) Have you felt like cutting yourself?
4.)Is that related to not feeling good enough, in your opinion?
Thanks so much!!!!!! Again, PM or comment, or email me the answers....I think when I get the post done, it'll be quite interesting...
EDIT: Anonymous made an excellent point, and I'd like to say that this post (when I finish it, at least) won't be a "don't do it, it's wrong" post. I want to dive into why people cut, and how Jesus can bring you out of that, and how we can help. Thanks!
yes. Not like, often or deep, but I have cut myself with tiny cuts. At times what stopped me from deeper cuts was knowing it was dumb, and that my friends would see it and I'd be in so much trouble. At other times, I held a knife to my wrists and then a voice told me, this is so wrong, do not purposely hurt yourself.
So, then, I didn't. You don't argue with conviction like that.
Usually, I just want to cut myself when I'm like, having issues with friends, or I feel like I can't, you know, like I can't help or do anything, and for some reason I feel like if I cut myself, I'd feel better.
This isn''t something I ever tell people, though. It's pretty personal. (therefore it's anonymous)
But, what do you know about cutting? Do you know how it feels to be so agitated you want to make your outside look like your soul feels? do you know what it feels like to cut yourself and see the scarlet liquid oozing out of your skin and think "what have I done, why did I do that?"
Do you understand that feeling, that desire to hurt yourself? Can you sympathize? I mean, yeah, it's wrong, but we know that. So, telling us how wrong we are won't really help. Not that I know you intended that, I'm just like, telling you before you do that.
I'm curious to see what you and other ppl have to say. always, ppl talk about cutting like it's just emos and freaks. And, maybe they're the only ones who really do it, but I think a lot more want to, and don't just b/c of what other ppl will think.
Thought Out by Anonymous at 11:21 AM, Tuesday, July 8, 2008
Anonymous,
I haven't actually ever cut myself. I have hurt myself on purpose...
No, I can't know exactly what you feel, and please be assured that the purpose of this post won't be a just..."don't do it, it's wrong" post. I want to look at why our generation is the way it is...I really want to talk about not feeling good enough, not feeling as if life were worth it. Because there I can sympathize.
Thanks so much for commenting...I should've explained my intended post a little more fully in the original post.
In Christ,
Grace
Thought Out by Grace4God at 6:22 PM, Tuesday, July 8, 2008
I'm really sorry to hear that anonymous. I used to be a forum with a girl who cut because she was so depressed and hurt. She needed someone to comfort her and had no one. I was thankful that I was able to love her, even for a short while. It breaks my heart when I hear things like this. My reaction isn't automatically that anyone who does this is "wrong". I don't think it's ever been that. Obviously God didn't make you to feel this way or do inflict pain on yourself, but because we are in a sinful world people fall into such situations and emotions.
Like Hannah, I've never actually cut myself, but I have thought about either hurting myself or killing myself... things weren't going right with my sister and I was caught in between doing what was right or not. I thought I simply ended my life it would be resolved. Unfortunately in my heart I knew that wasn't the answer. Sometimes I get very depressed, not to the point of hurting myself, but pretty low. I am still struggling somewhat.
God has a plan for my life and if I choose to take it into my own hands I'd be taking that power, which is the Creator's, away from Him. I knew He put me here for a reason and that I had no right to do anything to the body he gave me. In the end I was there to help me sister come back from rebellion and find her way back to Jesus.
I'm not sure why you cut yourself but I pray that the Lord will heal whatever scars or heartache you have. I pray He would show you that you are here for a purpose and that you should not be harming the temple He gave you.
I pray that you would be able to come out of this and be a testimony of God's awesome power for others who cut.
Obviously I don't want my identity known either because this was so long ago and wasn't really known to anyone but myself and it's personal.... so I can't say "contact me", but who knows if God will send you my way.
Love your "healed and loved" friend,
Anonymous #2
Thought Out by Anonymous #2 at 1:27 AM, Wednesday, July 9, 2008
Hey!
Thanks for writing me back. I would love to be on your friends list. For some reason I can't get to place to put friends on. I'm new @ this stuff. Your blog is really neat. Sorry it took me so long to write back. I don't get on the computer much. Maybe yopu could help me with mine. I don't know how to put that extra stuff on mine. Do you like to garden? I do. I have ten tomatoe plants, merrigolds, and sunflowers.WE have a pool to.We're getting ready for VBS. It's about dinos. Well G2G!!!
from: fiddlincat
Thought Out by fiddlincat at 2:01 PM, Wednesday, July 9, 2008
Thanks for the comment - I'm glad you liked the poem!
I've never cut myself. Anonymous is right . . .I don't completely understand. I've been through times of depression and discouragement, but was never driven to actually harm myself. I'm glad you're doing a post on cutting - this is something I want to understand, to know if there is a way I can help.
Blessings,
Kori
Thought Out by LittleSparow at 2:17 PM, Wednesday, July 9, 2008
My wonderful friend Jocelyn sent me this in an e-mail of blog posts she liked, and I am so glad that she did. I am a cutter and have been since I was 14 years old, I am now 18. I have had a lot of, I guess you could say drama in my life. In the past 4 years I have had 9 very close, dear friends pass away, I have lost two houses, one in a hurricane and one in a fire, I was raped and never told anyone, my parents are divorcing and blaming me for it, I have been physically, emotinally, and verbally abused by my father since I was little, and when I tried to go to a home for girls to get help for my cutting, bulimia, and suicide attempts, my mom said I couldn't go because she needed me as a babysitter for my youngest brother while she went out with friends. My mother has turned into a teenager, and I have taken on the role of the mother, taking care of my younger brothers while I try to juggle 15 credits at college, working two jobs, volunteering at the humane society, fixing up a cemetery, and acting in my local theatre. Sometimes the stress, lonliness, and pain just become to much. Cutting is my release from all of my pain, stress, and lonliness, I hold it all in and put on a mask, a smiling face, and when I can't handle it anymore I cut myself. It is almost impossible for someone to understand how cutting helps unless the are or were a cutter. I have been angry at God, so instead of taking all of my pain to him, I turn to cutting. I am angry and hurting, and cutting is the only thing that keeps me from going over the edge. My family has never told me they love me, and they are always complaining that I am to fat and ugly, so I feel like I am not good enough. There are sometimes that I wish I could stop cutting, but I feel that there is no more help for me. Thank you so much for taking on the challenge of this type of post, I can't wait to read it when you are finished. ~A hurting lost soul~
Thought Out by A hurting lost soul at 11:19 AM, Friday, July 11, 2008
Wow, this is a really, really, sensitive subject!
No, I've never cut myself, nor have I ever wanted to. Honestly, I hope your entry will help me to be more understanding, because I honestly don't know what to say or do when someone is hurting so badly. I don't want to say things like 'I understand' or 'God knows your pain. Trust Him', because I don't want to sound like I'm better or holier or something. Personally, I hate it when I'm going through a tough time and someone will be like, I understand, when they really don't have a clue.
Edited by Bekka on Friday, July 11, 2008 at 4:02 PM
Thought Out by Bekka at 3:59 PM, Friday, July 11, 2008
Wow, this should be an incredible post. And Grace kudos to you, you have taken on a great challenge. In answer to your question no I have never cut myself. But there was one time when I came very close to it. It was during a very sad time in my life a few years ago. I was juggling a lot of emotional battles at the time. I vividly remember having a knife in my hand ready to give it a shot. When I could just feel God's presence. I don't know if you have ever had one of those moments. But it was like this peace came over me. I am sorry that the thought of cutting myself ever came to mind. But perhaps for me it was a testing of my faith. You know I would say what Bekka said, and say that I can't relate. But that's not true. I think that every person wants to turn to something when they are hurting. Whether it be drugs, alcohol, sex, cutting, or even something on a smaller scale. But that's where we (I) go wrong. We turn to someTHING to satisfy us and hopefully relieve all our problems. When Someone (God) has been there to satisfy us all along. I was a Christian when I had the thoughts of cutting myself, and I have done a lot of things to try and relieve myself of pain in other ways, and I regret it. But that's because my focus was on the wrong thing. I was so focused on me and my problems, that I took my focus off of God. And He used that to bring me back to Him. Anyway thanks for the comment Grace and I look forward to reading your post.
Thought Out by CountryKell at 9:11 PM, Friday, July 11, 2008
What Kori said is true; I just didn't think of it like that. While I've never turned to cutting in times of depression or hurt, I have turned to other things like internet, or journaling. Not bad things in and of themselves, but it's bad when it becomes an obsession because you're trying to cover your pain and pretend you aren't hurting. Wow, I hope that made sense, lol. And yeah, we do tend to turn to THINGS instead of to God, don't we? It's sad. I can probably relate more than I thought.
Edited by Bekka on Saturday, July 12, 2008 at 2:17 PM
Thought Out by Bekka at 2:14 PM, Saturday, July 12, 2008
A hurting lost soul,
I just want you to know that I'm praying for you. In fact, I'm praying for all of you. Like many of you, I have never cut myself, but I would agree that I don't always deal with pain (mostly emotional) in the right way. Instead of taking it to God and leaving it with Him, I, too, often go to friends, or books, or journaling, or writing, or just keep it bottled up inside until God breaks me over it or I just can't stand it any longer and I take it to God. I know I am blessed to have the family and the life that I have, but I am no better than anyone else, neither do I deserve it any more than anyone else.
That said, I am praying for all of you and am interested to see where this will go. Grace, when the post is done maybe I'll link to it from JFT.
~Emy
Thought Out by jesusfreakteens at 10:53 PM, Sunday, July 13, 2008
I have never tried to cut myself, but have known what it feels like to think... maybe this isn't worth it. There's a big bridge over the river...
But God just turned me around and showed me how wrong that would be. And He showed me that living for Him can be too much joy to just throw away if you choose to let it be. And God shows me little things in life that you just can't miss every day! Whether it be a little brother asking you to play a game with him, or a mountain topped with snow in the middle of the summer.
I am praying for every one of you on here.
PS Thanks for the award down there, Nan! I love you!
Thought Out by Meggy T at 10:39 PM, Thursday, July 17, 2008
