I love, love, LOVE the holiday season and all that it offers and all that it means. I love the lights. I love the Christmas carols. I love buying and wrapping gifts, and finding that "perfect" gift for each person on my list. I love Christmas caroling. I love celebrating Christ's birth. And, honestly, I love opening my gifts, as childish as that may sound. I also love to watch my DH and DD open their gifts, and see their delight if I pick something that they love.  I pretty much love everything about the season! :D

I am so enjoying the holidays, especially now that my DD is old enough to enjoy it, as well. She loves the tree, the decorations, the lights, the nativity scene, the songs. She's going to be like me. Plus, she is a December baby, which makes it even more special. :-)

But this year I'm also feeling sad. We've had some unfortunate things happen in our church which have made my in-laws feel that they need to leave. This saddens me so very much. I love going to church with them, and it means so much to me to have them there. I'm also afraid my dad and his wife might not be far behind them in leaving. I really don't want that to happen. It has been so special to us to be able to go to church with so many of DD's grandparents. I also am going to have to resign my position as worship leader, which is very difficult to do. I have been praying and struggling over this decision for a while now, and it seems the only thing to do - especially now that MIL and FIL are leaving, as they are the ones who watch DD while I'm leading the music. (DH has to work on Sundays, and only gets to attend church with us on Sunday nights.) This whole situation just makes me very, very sad. I hate for things to change like this. It definitely forces me out of my "comfort zone." It is amazing how easy it is for us to get totally comfortable with our lives, and then it it so hard when things change.

I also get frustrated with trying to schedule our visits to everyone over the holidays. Everyone gives us a guilt trip, and it is so hard to get everyone together at the same time, which is what all of the parents want. It becomes very frustrating trying to juggle everyone's schedules and be wherever everyone wants us to be when they want us to be there. I do love to see everyone. I just hate the way it all becomes such a "hassle" most of the time.

Anyway, I need to think on positive things, and enjoy the good things about the holidays. I really do love this time of year, and I need to appreciate it.

Well, this post was just a big ramble and vent, I suppose, but I feel better for having said it all. ;-)

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Posted by Janne

Posted by sproutgirl