Saturday, March 15, 2008 - Yet another doctor's appointment
Yesterday was my 4 week checkup with by OB/GYN. It was actually just like a 6 wk postpartum checkup, without the oohing and aahing over a newborn baby.
My doctor and I talked about lots of things, and he wanted to know how my frame of mind was. He was very careful over that, and not just how I was doing physically. That's one of the things that I like about my doctor. He asked about how I was doing mentally, so I told him.
I told him I felt like I was still having trouble adjusting mentally. I told him I felt like what I am going through emotionally feels an awful lot like post-traumatic stress. I talked about the state of my emotions and how I think my miscarriages had traumatized me, especially that last one.
I was a little apprehensive talking to him about all that, for fear he'd look at me quizzically like he'd never heard of a woman feeling any of that before. I talked hesitantly, somewhat nervously, thinking he'd think I was off my rocker and be REALLY concerned then about me.
But do you know what he said??
He said what I was feeling and thinking was totally normal after a traumatic loss like I had experienced.
Imagine my relief! He understood and I was normal!!
He was so gracious, so compassionate in just the right way, not overly sappy, but very caring. It was easier talking to him after that. I actually had no idea he was even going to want to know about the state of my emotions and mind. I had thought it was just an appointment to check my red blood cell counts. But he did want to know how I was really doing, and so I decided not to candy coat it for him or frost my thoughts or emotions with pink sprinkly frosting.
And my state of mind is normal!
Whew. Nobody at the office thinks I'm a weirdo.
That's a relief, to know that he cares about the whole me!
He offered me a listening ear, followed by a few prescription drugs such as a mild anti depressant, a drug called Buspar for anxiety, and a mild form of hormonal birth control, just to get my emotions and my hormones where they needed to be. All of these would be temporary, he assured me......but he didn't force me to take them. He actually said that even knowing they were available and that I could have them if I decided to may be enough to help me over the hump.
He knows us and the way we choose to live, so he also suggested St John's Wort for me.
Any other doctor would have those prescriptions written out and shoved at me first thing, no questions asked, not taking no for an answer. Not so my doctor. He told me to go home and talk to my husband and then call him to let him know what I had decided.
I know, you gals already love him, and sorry, he isn't taking new patients right now!! lol!!
He then proceeded to do the exam and to let me know that he was very concerned about the recurring miscarriages, especially the last one that was so physically devastating for my body. He wanted to find out why I was suddenly having miscarriages and try to help me have a pregnancy that my body can sustain. He also said that sometimes it's okay to give your body a rest, especially after being so severely anemic. He ordered a battery of different blood tests, I think there were 8 vials of blood taken, or something like that.....
My husband said, "oh great, now that your blood count has come up a bit, they want to TAKE more blood! Is that good for you right now?" My mom actually said that too! But I told my husband that certain things are necessary if we want to find out what's the deal and have a healthy pregnancy with a real baby at the end, and he understood. He just cares very much about my health and he sees where I am physically. What a sweet man, sorry gals, he's taken, and there's only one like him in the world, and he's MINE!!! lol!
So my doctor is screening me for all kinds of weird stuff I've never heard of before, but some of the stuff he's looking for I've heard of, like some type of lupus, and some sort of anti-coagulating blood thing, and my thyroid numbers (I have a goiter on or in my thyroid that's been there since my son was born. He's 13 next month and we've never been able to figure out why it's there. That's another post, though!). I'll find out the results next week sometime. I will go in for another appointment next Tuesday to talk about it all. He was alarmed that my gums are so white when they've usually been a healthy pink. That lead him to want to check my red blood cell count again.
At the end of our talk he told me to go out and have some steak and some more iron and he'd see me next week.
This whole journey these past 6 months has been so hard for me, because it's been unchartered waters for us. And this next stage of the game is no less daunting, because we've never been here before either. You know, getting down to the why's of what's going on here.
*sigh*
I mean, don't get me wrong here, I've heard of women having many more miscarriages than me, and I told the doctor that, but he looked at me like, not you, not women who have had so many successful pregnancies and nary a miscarriage ever.
I'm not trying to garner sympathy from you out there. I just wanted to tell you where we were and maybe you could pray for us, for what exactly, I don't know.
Maybe for endurance right now for my family, because not only is my health in the toilet right now, there are all sorts of other things happening within my family right now.
Please pray for us. Pray that we will come out of this trial shining for the Lord, stronger and tougher and more in love with Him and closer as a family.
And pray for my body. I have some special needs and have to have just the right supplements to balance my body, otherwise it's UGLY around here!!! lol!
Thanks......and I'll let you know how my blood looks!!
Comments
Saturday, March 15, 2008 - Untitled Comment
Posted by Rebeca
I'm praying for you Leanne! And it sounds like your doctor is great. I'm glad he's running all those tests. I had a battery of tests done too, after the second miscarriage, and the only thing they determined was that my body doesn't process folic acid properly so I have to take way more of it than a normal person does. Well, if there is anything to be found, I pray that they'll find it and you will have wisdom to know how to proceed. For now, it sounds like you need to keep resting. Look into taking some liquid chlorophyl or spirulina for your iron levels. They are both readily absorbable forms of iron. In fact, since taking a supplement with spirulina this is the first pregnancy where my iron levels have stayed good. I've usually been borderline anemic.
Hang in there friend!
Love,
Rebeca
Saturday, March 15, 2008 - Untitled Comment
Posted by drewsfamilytx
What a blessing! I am so glad that you were able to be honest and open with your doctor-- and that he LISTENED.
I am praying for you, dear Leanne-- physically and emotionally. Praying for wisdom for your doctor and for God to give you peace.
Love you,
Marsha
Monday, March 17, 2008 - Untitled Comment
Posted by EEEEMommy
How fortunate that you have such an understanding doctor. I will continue to be praying for you and your family!
Monday, March 17, 2008 - <em>Untitled Comment</em>
Posted by StillHisGirl
Hey, Leanne. Hope you're feeling better today! I've had severe anemia, too, close to needing a transfusion. You just can't describe that fatigue, can you? My thyroid is also messed up. So now I'm on more meds, and I think they are helping.
I hesitate to take many drugs, but I do believe that God can use those- I call them His modern day mud. (when Jesus healed the blind man; putting mud on his eyes. He didn't NEED to use mud, but He chose to.)
Praying God continues to heal your body and your heart.
I'll do a post on my camera one of these days. :)
Edited by StillHisGirl on Monday, March 17, 2008 at 11:42 AM
Monday, March 17, 2008 - Untitled Comment
Posted by momanna98
You have the best doctor ever! Good doctors are so hard to find.
Monday, March 17, 2008 - Untitled Comment
Posted by duckygirl
Oh, having a great doctor is so nice!! I'm really feeling weird about the doctor I have now and I'm not even sure why. So enjoy the fact that you are comfortable with Dr. W...some of us are envious :)
~Laura
Monday, March 17, 2008 - Untitled Comment
Posted by Gayle
I am so glad that your Dr. was so understanding, Leanne. It must take so much off of your mind to have him come alongside you like he did.
I have had to take some anti-depressants for a very short period of time after a traumatic experience in my life a few years ago. I am not a pill person AT ALL, but I will say that it really helped me to straighten out and get back on track. Maybe that will help?
Praying for you...
Gayle
thewestiecrew.blogspot.com
