Oct. 3, 2008 - Trust
Trust. Well, the Lord is certainly working on me in that area! So many ups and downs with this move! So many changes and situations where I just don't know how things are going to work out. It truly has been challenging for me since I am one who likes all her "ducks in a row". I like to make my plans and I really do lack flexibility! The Lord is always working on me in that area. Honestly, you'd think I'd learn by now! :) But no, I must always learn the hard way it seems! :)
Is it a lack of flexibility when there really isn't a plan to flex from?? Or is that just chaos?? Ok, enough whining already! I woke up in the wee hours this morning and the first thought I had was "Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him and He will direct your paths." Isn't that a great thought to wake up to?? I know I needed it, and God in His great mercy for this wimpy servant of His provided yet again.
Why is it so difficult to trust? I honestly don't know! I look at the Israelites and rather smugly, I am ashamed to admit, judge them for their lack of faith. I mean, look at all God did for them....rescuing them from enemies, parting the seas, providing food and water in the desert and clothes that didn't wear out. And did they trust? NO! Just after the Lord did something wonderfully miraculous, they were complaining and fearing the next trial. Oh boy, that's exactly what I have been doing!! And it is humbling.
An example of this would be a few weekends ago when my dh was home (finally!) for a weekend. He got in at 12:30 a.m. on a Sat. In the early afternoon of Sat., I took 2 of my boys and went shopping for my daughter's birthday (can my baby really be ten???). We were gone for a few hours and upon our return noticed my dh and oldest son in the driveway talking with the neighbors. Isn't that nice, I thought, that my dh is getting to catch up w/ the neighbors while he's home. Then my son motioned me to stop and pointed to the downed power line in our yard. It had been raining, no POURING, all day (remnants of a hurricane I think) and a different neighbor's dead tree fell on the power lines in our yard, taking down the lines and blowing the transformer. According to my kids, sparks flew everywhere! This was in a heavily wooded section of our yard and I thanked God that the rain had been so heavy or there may have been a fire! And the power line was down in the next door neighbor's back yard. They have 3 little boys that are usually out in the yard on a Sat. but due to the rain, were safely indoors. Again, I thanked God. I saw a neighbor's dog get electrocuted by a downed wire when I was a kid (the neighbor boy almost died as well, but my dad saved him) and it was horrible! I was so thankful no one was hurt.
So, now we are without power and it is still raining. We have NEVER had water in our basement and have just sold our house (but not closed on the sale yet). I went inside and had to get something from the basement. What was on the floor? Yes, the sump pumps had stopped pumping due to no power and water was just starting to come into the basement by the sump pump. We had an old generator that my father in law had given us about 5 years ago. We've never used the thing but just about that time, my husband got it going! Praise the Lord, no more water in the basement, just that small amount! And dh was able to run power to our fridge and some lights on that end of the house. That got us through and we were thankful!! I was so very thankful that the Lord brought my dh home that weekend as I would have had no idea what to do!! And even though my son is very mechanically inclined, he'd never run a generator or started on that had been sitting. I could really see the Lord's hand in all of this!
My dh and I got up a few times in the night to fuel the generator and check on things. Then the kids and I went to a.m. church and dh stayed home to tend the generator. I was so disappointed he couldn't come with us and did my fair share of complaining in my heart to the Lord about that! But the Lord always has a reason.....
We got home to find the power on...thank you Lord! And then my dh told me the generator was making "a really loud, awful noise". You have to understand my dh is an optimist and tends to minimize problems (probably because his emotional, inflexible wife doesn't hand them very well!), so when he said there was a problem, it was probably pretty bad! He was working on the generator to no avail when the power company showed up and said "Don't worry, we'll have your power back on in just a few minutes!" And praise the Lord, they did! No water in the basement, no loss of groceries from our fridge, no one hurt. I was very, very thankful!
But then guess what happened? I did "the Israelite thing". Yep. I am sorry to say I started to think of the next trial. My dh had to leave on Monday and I started to panic; yes, panic! What would I do if he wasn't there to help w/ the next trial? How would I handle it? Fear just ruled my heart! That evening when we all went to church together (thanks, Lord, that even though I complained, you provided for us to go as a family that night!) the message was on being in the Word, and trusting the Lord. Isn't God good? He knew exactly what this struggling, pitiful child of His needed to calm her heart. Was I trusting in God? NO! I was trusting in others. Was I fearing God? NO! I was fearing circumstances. Lesson learned, right? End of story? Unfortunately, no. I must keep bringing that same baggage of mistrust back to the foot of the cross and leaving it with the One who can handle it. It is a continuous process, not an event! I am so thankful for the mercy of God and to be able to trust in the One who is worthy of my trust!
I was thinking of a song we sang in church just last week. As I trust the Lord, my hearts desire is to do what we sang "I will follow/I will listen/I will love You/All of my days/I will sing to and worship/the King who is worthy/l will love and adore You/I will bow down before You/ You're my Prince of Peace and I will live my life for You!"
He is my Prince of Peace and I CAN trust in Him. With His help, I WILL live my life for Him!
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Aug. 12, 2008 - The Lord is so amazing part 2
Since the Lord is just so amazing, this could be the title of an infinite number of posts! :)
Anyways, I just got back from my first visit to SC and am truly amazed by the Lord once again! He is just so awesome!! He gave me peace that truly passes all understanding throughout the whole trip. I've never flown by myself before and it has been a number of years since I've flown at all! Usually, situations where I'm not very sure about what's going to happen or how it will all work out make me very anxious. But that didn't happen! I had such an incredible peace the whole time; navigating through busy Metro airport, flying during turbulence, driving around unknown parts in SC etc. I am known for my tendency to get very turned around and lost...*zero* sense of direction!!
Here's how the Lord showed Himself amazing to me: during the turbulence, I was so calm and at peace (quite out of character!) that I actually even ENJOYED the turbulence. Crazy, I know! You should have seen some of the looks I got from the other passengers! :) ha Too funny! But the whole time the plane shook and dropped (like the sensation in an elevator that suddenly "drops") I kept thinking how it felt like a roller coaster....and I *love* rollercoasters! Kept thinking about how my son would've loved it, too as he is my roller coaster- front seat riding buddy! And as we flew above the clouds lightning illuminated the whole sky in brilliant flashes. In my heart (didn't want to convince the other passengers that I was a complete loon!) I was singing "God of Wonders". You know, "God of Wonders beyond our galaxy, You are holy. The universe declares Your majesty, you are holy. Lord of heaven and earth..."
I also discovered that God is the best GPS! Didn't have a gps unit and got hopelessly turned around and frustrated. As my bad attitude developed, the Lord got ahold of me and prompted me to pray. Just as soon as I told Him "Lord, I am lost! I have no clue where I am and cannot find my way out on my own. But YOU know! Please help me and help me to trust in You" and pulled my van back out on the road, I spotted the very street I needed to get me out of that subdivision! And from that point on, I never got hopelessly lost again! :) I immediately was awed by Him and told Him (out loud!) "God, you are BETTER than gps!" How often do we depend on our gadgets (like gps and cellphones) instead of our God?? I am guilty as charged but was so thankful I didn't have that so that the Lord got all the glory and showed His power to me.
Truly amazing, isn't He???
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Jul. 30, 2008 - The Lord is so amazing!
I don't know if that Playlist above will work, but I'm being daring and giving it a try!
The Lord is just so amazing! I continue to marvel at the peace He has given me in the midst of this move! He shows me in many ways that He has gone before me in this move. One of the things He has done is to send me a fellow homeschooling mom to help me "navigate" the homeschooling requirements in SC! I have bought curriculum from Stephanie at The Christian Curriculum Connection for about 5 years and just in this last year we've really gotten to know one another by sharing prayer requests and the ways that the Lord is answering those prayers! All this, without me ever knowing that the Lord was going to send my family to SC and that we'll live probably an hour away from Stephanie! Isn't He good? Stephanie has sent me a BEAUTIFUL hardcover book that is wonderfully illustrated and gives the history of SC, its geography etc. And if that wasn't great enough, she also sent me a booklet on the Accountability and Homeschool groups in SC that has made things so much easier for me. I just can't get over the Lord's goodness to me! He is good, and His faithfulness endures forever! Whenever I get a little nervous about this move, or overwhelmed with all the details, I am reminded how He has already provided and gone before me and will continue to provide. I can trust the One who is worthy of my trust!
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Jul. 15, 2008 - What the Lord is teaching me in the midst of our move
Well, a long awaited answer to prayer has come! We knew that my husband's job was coming to an end and for the past 2 years he's been looking for another job. We really wanted to stay in MI, but the job market is just so tight, and nothing was available. In this last year, he's interviewed by phone dozens of times and in person at least a handful. All areas of the U.S. and frankly, quite stressful for me! It has been a faith stretcher and builder. It has kept me on my knees before the Lord, crying out to Him. But the Lord is so good! He has taught me so very much and continues to do so. He reminds me so many times of His love for me and that He knows the beginning from the end. He is worthy of my trust.
So, the answer to prayer for a new job came......we are moving to South Carolina! I could share so many neat things about this answer but a few of the highlights are:
The job is a very good one that Jim is excited about. He called last week to say "They're hiring! AND there's money in the budget!!" It has been SO long since that has been the case for him! He truly enjoys a new adventure! We call him our Trekkie, liking "to go where no man has gone before"! He is very well suited to this position and I am very happy for him and grateful to the Lord for providing it. Perfect timing, as his job was coming to a close here in MI. I am not so adventurous as my dh, but I am also truly excited about this! AND I have perfect peace which, if you know me, you know I struggle with this! I am usually a worrier and the unknown tends to make me anxious. Not so in this case! I am VERY sad to leave my family, friends and church home.....I will miss everyone so much!! So many people have meant so much to me! I do not enjoy meeting new people in the sense that I am not a great conversationalist and don't really know how to get one started unless I know common ground. Some people are surprised that I am actually quite shy! And so is my daughter in new situations! Who would've thunk it? :) But the Lord will continue to move us out of our comfort zone (I always think of Pastor Hall when I use that term!!) and stretch us and grow us into the people that we ought to be.......more like Jesus!
I have so appreciated raising my kids at Evangel! So many have just poured into my life and theirs and I love that my brothers and sisters in the Lord know our heart in raising our children and are so supportive and helpful in that. It will be hard to leave that trusting, loving body of Christ but I know that the God who is Lord here, is also the Lord there! And He has a place for us, a ministry for us and we are trusting Him to guide and direct us to a new church home. We truly want His will in this area......how could a gracious, loving Heavenly Father not answer that prayer? He will, and His timing is perfect.
Another neat thing: I have always wanted to see the Carolinas! I've never been, and am moving sight unseen, but isn't the Lord good to move me someplace I have always wanted to go?? Out of all the places Jim interviewed, it pleased the Lord to send us there. He is too awesome for words! We had just come back from a vacation in FL (not knowing about this job) and both of us commented that the older we get, the more we'd love to live in the South! Palm trees (my favorites!) and sunshine here we come! And a friend told me that in NC, flowers bloom all year long! So I'm guessing they do in SC as well. I just love flowers! Again, I am overwhelmed by God's goodness to me. He is good and His mercy endures forever.
Yet another neat thing about this move: I LOVE Civil War history. Guess where the war started? SC with the firing at Fort Sumter!! LOTS and lots of interesting historical sites here.......I sure do hope my fellow homeschooling moms (and Civil War buff friends) will come and visit us and see all this firsthand! And only about 2 hours from Myrtle Beach, too! A great vacation destination......have I convinced anyone yet?? :)
A few songs and verses that the Lord has used to minister to me through all of this (I'll share more in my next post):
Blessed Be Your Name espec. the lyrics "You give and take away, my heart will choose to say, Blessed be Your name" I will choose to bless the Lord and look for the good, even through the pain of leaving! He has given and taken away, yet blessed be His name. He knows best and I WILL trust Him!
Ps. 43 (and a song!) Why so downcast O my soul? Put your hope in God, and bless the Lord O my soul.
Ps. 46 God is my refuge and my strength, an ever present help in trouble. Therefore I will not fear, though the earth give way and the mountains fall into the heart of the sea. I have always loved this verse, and remind myself that the earth isn't giving way, just my place on it is changing!! He alone is my refuge and He alone gives me strength Day by Day (love that hymn!!)
He Leadeth Me.....will I let Him lead? Will I struggle against his leading? No! I will choose to let Him lead and teach me what I need to learn.
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Jun. 2, 2008 - As thy days, so shall thy strength be Deut 33:25
Yesterday we sang "Day by Day" in church. That is one of my favorite hymns! The Lord gave me the verse in Deut 33:25 "As thy days, so shall thy strength be" back when I was expecting my fourth child. I had three very active little boys to care for and felt so overwhelmed with the thought of adding another baby to the mix! And I knew that I might face bedrest and/or months of restricted activity (I did......but that's another story!!)
Anyways, back one Sunday morning nearly 10 years ago, we sang this hymn and the Deut. verse was printed at the top of the page. It so encouraged my heart and isn't it just like our loving Father to reach down and say "Honey, don't worry about tomorrow, I'll be there for you every step of the way!"?
He is so good! I just L-O-V-E my church!!! I am so incredibly blessed to be a part of the body of Christ. I always feel when we sing together like heaven has opened and I am getting a little glimpse of what it will be like in Heaven, when we are all singing and praising the Lord with the angels! And like one of our pastors commented last night, we'll all have perfect pitch. Hey! Has he been sitting next to me again? ha
Anyways, getting back from that little rabbit trail...... "Day by day and with each passing moment, strength I find to meet my trials here;" Grace in time of need, for each day, right when we need it! Strength from the Lord... I can do ALL things through Christ who strengthens me. Not my puny strength, but his magnificent, awesome power!! The power of the creator of the Universe! Now THAT is power! When I am weak, then I am strong. Only as I admit my sins and weaknesses (though He knows them anyway......just wants me to "fess up") can He truly work in and through me. I want to be a willing vessel for You, Lord. Trials aplenty but the promise that He will be there to walk me through them.
"Trusting in my Father's wise bestowment, I've no cause for worry or for fear" Be anxious for nothing........a verse I must claim over and over and over! I can trust in the One who knows the beginning from the end. Bestowment......it means gift. A gift of peace that passes understanding to guard my heart and mind. He is good, and His mercy endures forever!
"He whose heart is kind beyond all measure, gives unto each day what He deems best" There is His kindness again......grace, and mercy in abundance! I can trust that whatever happens today is God's best for me. Lord, help me to remember that and not to see the things that happen as annoyances to MY plan!! You know how weak I am in this area!
"Lovingly, its part of pain and pleasure, mingling toil with peace and rest." God IS love and he lovingly allows trials in my life to make me the person He wants me to be. Thanks for loving me so much, Lord, and for giving me rest when you know I've "had enough"! You are too good for words!
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Apr. 27, 2008 - If a watch doesn't tell time....
We are in GA today and went to church in nearby Chattanooga TN at Woodland Park Baptist Church. The body of Christ is amazing and I am so thankful that it is not limited to just my home church.....though I love Evangel!!
Anyways....the Pastor told a story about a watchmaker that made some really expensive watches unlike any other. These watches did not tell time!! No numbers, no hands, nothing to tell time at all! They only told whether it was day or night! Every one of these super expensive watches sold out! His question was this: If a watch doesn't tell time, is it still a watch? And if a Christian doesn't show fruit, are they still a Christian?
Col 1:24-29 was the text, but mainly v. 28. If I don't have fruit in my life, am I really a Christian? When you know Christ, there should be a difference! Beware of people who AREN'T Jesus Freaks, he said! :) They are concerned about rights......I have died and have no rights! I have the right to yield myself to the One who died for me.
V. 28 We proclaim Him.....WE: ALL of us need to do this! PROCLAIM: to announce far and wide. HIM: It's all about you, Jesus! The message is EVERYTHING and the messenger is nothing. (Let me hide myself in Thee, Lord!)
There is no such thing as a Secret Service Christian! Does my life show Christ? Does it proclaim His power far and wide?? Do I admonish AND teach in a spirit of gentleness, first removing that "big 'ol plank" from my own eyes??
Am I able to BE admonished? Ouch! Now that one hurt! Just yesterday my dh was "critiquing" my driving and I did not respond too kindly to this "admonishing"! Lord, help me to be teachable and meek.
"For this purpose I labor" Labor=toil to the point of exhaustion! Guess childbirth/labor is aptly named, huh?! "Striving according to His power which mightily works within me." Striving = agony. Coming to the end of myself and letting His power work in me. HE CAN DO IT!! What is the thing that the Enemy has convinced me won't change? Is ANYTHING too hard for God?
We closed with "Change My Heart, Oh God" and that is truly the desire and cry of my heart!
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Mar. 9, 2008 - Some Needed Peace
Have you ever felt in need of peace? That's what I was feeling this past week. Knowing that I needed to let go of some things that had me worried but having such a hard time doing so! Didn't help that I was sleep deprived due to a sick child. I always say there is a reason that sleep deprivation is used as a means of torture-----it's because it is effective! In my case, very effective! :) Anyways, I digress!
The Lord led me once again to John 14:27 "Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid."
Think about that. His peace. The Creator and Sustainer of the Universe cares about me enough to want to give me peace. He gives a different kind of peace than this world does. Lasting. Or should I say "everlasting"? Real. True. He loves me enough to be my Comforter, my Rock; the One I can run to when I am anxious and afraid! I know that I don't deserve this precious gift He offers, but I am so thankful that He DOES offer it! No matter what I am facing, He is there to help me through it and work in the situation for my good and His glory.
The verse above is one of my favorites. Another favorite: "Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus." Phil 4:6-7
What an amazing God we have! He is intimately involved in our lives and is so gentle and loving. Can't you just hear Him saying "My child, you don't need to be afraid. Just ask......I'm here for you! Sleep peacefully, I'll guard your heart and mind. It's ok, remember that I've got it all under control." And I'm reminded of Hezekiah in 2 Kings 19. When faced with a very real problem, he took it and put it before the Lord. He poured out his problem before the Lord, left it in the Lord's hands and the Lord answered! Without Hezekiah or anyone else's help, the Lord took care of the whole problem!
I had to do that this week. Just lay my burdens out before the Lord and ask for His help. Relinquish them to the One who knows the beginning and the end. Let Him solve it and rest in knowing that not only CAN He do it, but that He loves me enough to want to do it!
His peace. There's nothing like it! :)
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Feb. 4, 2008 - Do you ever feel like just giving up?
Sometimes I sure do! Winter blahs, discouragement, feeling overloaded.......all these things can make me feel like just throwing in the towel!The Lord is constantly teaching me perseverance, though. Recently I looked at the life of Elijah in 1 Kings 19. A little background: Elijah had just gone up against the prophets of Baal and the Lord gave him victory! He was able to call down fire from heaven which burned up the offering and showed (1 Kings 18:37-41) God's awesome power! He had the evil prophets of Baal killed and that made Jezebel the wicked queen MAD!! Elijah became afraid and ran for his life!
1 Kings 19:4b tells us that Elijah says "I have had enough, Lord". "Take my life; I am no better than my ancestors. Then he lay down under the tree and fell asleep."
Some things the Lord showed me in this passage:
Elijah forgot who was in control! It is God, not Jezebel! He forgot that the Lord is sovereign and that NOTHING could happen to him except what God allowed.
Even though he just saw the Lord's amazing power and experienced victory, he was plunged to despair. Aren't we just like that? I know I am! The highs and the lows....from the heights to the depths! Seeing God answer prayers and work in my life to wondering "Where are you, Lord? What do you want me to learn in this situation?"
It is very easy to take our eyes off of God and put it on our circumstances! It is easy to throw up our hands and say "I've had enough, Lord!"
BUT:
I also see God's mercy and compassion even when Elijah didn't handle things the right way. He gave him rest, food and helpers! Often when I get so discouraged and feel like giving up, I pick up a load of guilt to go with it! I know I should persevere and feel guilty that I'm not! The Lord is so gracious and compassionate, though! Ready to help us and having pity on us!
The Lord showed himself powerful to Elijah (display of His power: wind, earthquake, fire) but His kindness and gentleness in the whisper is what really stood out to me!
It made me realize yet again that I need to take my burdens to the One who loves me, leave it with Him, and let His awesome power work in and through my life. He is loving, merciful, kind and gentle and we can trust Him to see us through!
Galations 6:9 Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up.
A friend recently said "Hold on through the tough times; hold on and don't miss the blessing that comes at the end." There's a lot of wisdom, there!
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Dec. 3, 2007 - A Sacrifice of Praise
I love the song "We bring a sacrifice of praise into the house of the Lord"! But I got to thinking recently and wondered what, exactly, is a "sacrifice of praise"?
Praise is such a wonderful, positive thing. And "sacrifice" usually involves difficulty. These 2 terms don't seem to go together! Or do they?
As I thought on this, the Lord showed me that a sacrifice of praise involves praising Him in the hard times. I love the song "Praise you in the storm" and I'm always challenged by that concept. Can I truly praise the Lord when things are hard, when my life is not going the way that I want it to? It is so easy to praise Him when life is all sunshine and smooth sailing!
But what about when He kicks me out of my comfort zone? What about the times when I'm doing my best to follow His will for me but I'm experiencing trials? Like Joseph, I have to follow God even when the outcome of that doesn't seem to make sense! I mean, Joseph correctly fled from Potiphar's wife and what happens? He gets thrown in the slammer! I wonder if he ever wondered "Lord, what are you doing?? I'm trying to follow you, and look where it has landed me!"
I know I have thought and felt that!! But I love Joseph's response at the end of this very long trial w/ his brothers......You meant it for evil, but God meant it for good!
Joseph is a great example to me! His steadfast trust in the Lord and following Him even when it was hard, unfair, and the trials unrelenting! Now there is a life lived with a "sacrifice of praise"!
Lord, help me to live my life as a sacrifice of praise to You. Thank you for the good times. And I thank you for the hard times, when you are "removing the dross from the silver" in my life and making me material fit for the Silversmith! Lord, the refining fire hurts and I don't like it, but I thank You that You are sovereign and that You work all things together for good for those that trust You and are called according to Your purpose! You are most worthy of my trust and praise!
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Nov. 29, 2007 - Truth
I just love teaching the AWANA girls! As I prepare for their lessons, the Lord really challenges me in those very areas!
Last night I asked a dear friend and fellow leader to share her salvation testimony. She shared how she had been raised in church, but that the gospel hadn't been preached there. After she married, had children, and moved to another state, she began working in a preschool and came to know a believer. This dear believer (I'll call her "Z") lived TRUTH before my friend. Her light shined so that my friend asked "What is different about you?" and Z was able to share that she had Jesus in her heart! What did that mean? my friend wondered. Z explained, and also invited my friend "L" to a Bible study. There she came to know the TRUTH! Praise the Lord for His Word! It has made all the difference in my life!
John 8:32 says "the truth shall set you free". Amen to that! :)
John 14:6. Jesus says "I am the Way, the Truth, and the Life; no man comes to the Father but by Me."
What is truth? That is a question asked often these days! But lest we think "relative truth" is just today's issue, look back at John 18:38. Pilate asked Jesus "What is truth?" Hmmmm....some things never change!
But really, what is truth? I looked it up in the dictionary and was annoyed to find that they used the word to define the word!!! I was always taught that was a "no no"! So I got out my handy dandy thesaurus and looked up "truth". Here's what I found:
real accurate honest dependable genuine actual valid reliable
That's a great list! But more importantly, that's what Jesus says He is when He says He is truth: real, accurate, honest, dependable, genuine, actual, valid, RELIABLE! :) Praise the Lord, He is all of those things and so much more!
Now here's my question: Do I live as though I know the Truth? Does my life shine with the fact that I know to whom I belong? And the one to whom I belong is real, honest, dependable, genuine and utterly reliable??
Do I live as though I believe that my Lord is sovereign and in control of ALL things? His Word says that He is! And His Word is truth!
Lord, I thank You that You are Truth! That I can totally, completely depend upon You for everything. I am awed and humbled that You would care for me.......and I am so thankful!!!
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Nov. 20, 2007 - Learning not to complain
I'm still reading the book "Calm My Anxious Heart". I keep going back to something in the beginning of the book. It is a list of things that a missionary wife and mom wrote out. This missionary ministered in a place where life was difficult! Hot, humid weather, intermittent water at best, isolation etc. This is what the Lord taught her (as discovered by her daughter in an old diary) and what He has challenged me with:
"Never allow yourself to complain about anything--not even the weather." Ow! That one already got me!!
"Never picture yourself in any other circumstances or someplace else."
"Never compare your lot with another's."
"Never allow yourself to wish this or that had been otherwise."
"Never dwell on tomorrow--remember that (tomorrow) is God's not ours."
Isn't that a great list? It surely challenges this complaining heart of mine. I want to learn the secret of being content in any and every situation, as the apostle Paul did. And here it is: I can do ALL things through Christ who strengthens me!
A dear friend used to frequently remind me that to "compare ourselves against ourselves is not wise". I have forgotten the reference for that verse, but I sure remember the verse! I have struggled with that, as well as wishing circumstances were different, and dwelling anxiously about my tomorrows.
My ABF (Adult Bible Fellowship) teacher keeps reminding us of the Lord's sovereignty. He is in control and I do not have to be! I can trust my heavenly Father with my family, my life, with everything! Lord, increase my faith and help me to trust You more, and complain much less!
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Nov. 17, 2007 - Forgiveness
Seventy times seven. Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another even as God for Christ's sake has forgiven you.
It's pretty clear what the Lord wants us to do. Forgive. Again and again. It's not optional! It's a command!
I really struggled with forgiveness this week. The offense from a dear one came on the heels of a very difficult week. How could this one do this to me when they KNEW what I had been going thruough? That hurt!! I saw the truth anew of the Proverb "An offended brother is more unyielding than a fortified city". That was me......unyielding. Hurt and licking my wounds. Knowing that I needed to forgive but withholding that forgiveness. Struggling mightily with my bad attitude!
Wasn't it me who just told my children AND my AWANA girls that love covers over a multitude of sins? A multitude! Not just one offense, but MANY! Wasn't I the one who just taught a few lessons on conflict and the right/wrong ways to resolve it? Yes, to my shame, that was me!
But, oh, the grace of our Lord! Wider, deeper, higher than all I can imagine. He didn't let this child of His get away with an unforgiving heart! He dealt with me on it and brought me to the place where I can say "I forgive" and MEAN it. I had to choose to obey and forgive even though I didn't FEEL like it.
After all He's done for me, and the MANY times I have offended Him with my sin, how could I not forgive? Praise the Lord that He helps me in my weakness! Praise Him that He loved me before I loved Him. Even while I was His enemy and my sins put Him on that cross, He loved. He forgave. I can do no less, but I sure do need His help!
My son had a guitar recital a few days ago and one of the songs just keeps playing in my heart. Part of it says "I choose to be a blessing for life." That's what I am choosing, Lord. Help me to be a blessing for You!
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Nov. 15, 2007 - More thoughts on contentment
Contentment. This sure is an area that the Lord is working on me! More from "Calm My Anxious Heart" by Linda Dillow:
She says "Most of us base our contentment on circumstances, on our feelings, or on other people". Guilty as charged!!! When things are difficult, when I am discouraged that things aren't working out the way I'd hoped, I DO NOT feel content! And being the emotionally driven person that I am, I do tend to base my contentment on how I feel.
But she goes on to say "True contentment is separate from our circumstances. Contentment is a state of the heart, not a state of affairs." I sure need to be reminded of that! Again and again, because I'm a little slow! Ok, really, really slow! I sure am thankful for my VERY patient Lord.
Linda sure captures the heart of my struggle in her book. I can really relate to her! She shares her "journey to contentment" and how the Lord used some problems with her teen children to show her this area of need. She shared that she became a Christian in college (like me!) and was excited to raise her children in a Christian home (me again!). She bought into the idea (also like I have) that if you "pump all the right things (God, His Word) into my children, they will automatically love and obey God." When she saw that this plan of hers wasn't working according to HER plan, she became anxious and depressed. Ouch! That's me! A friend of hers pointed out that it was a "control" issue. This is so very true! I want to see results, NOW, and I don't want to wait on God's timing. I worry about the future for my kids. Will they make right choices? Will they follow the Lord? We have mainly unsaved family that does not agree with our decision to homeschool and there is constant criticism there. They always want to point out to me (and often to my kids) what they are "missing". And to my dismay, sometimes my kids are swayed by that! Sometimes I am, too! I realize fully that I fall short in so many areas......don't really need someone to shine a spotlight on it! :)
I do try to turn those times of criticism and hurt over to the Lord. It is a constant struggle. But I am reminded that "in this world you will have trouble but take heart! I have overcome the world". I CAN do ALL things through CHRIST who strengthens me.
I am so very, very thankful that I do not have to do this on my own! Jesus, my friend, my gentle Shepherd is right there with me to hold me in His arms and gently lead me. He is my strength when I am weak, He is the treasure that I seek, He is my all in all!
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Nov. 14, 2007 - The secret of being content
I know what it is to be in need, and I know what itis to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do everything through Him who gives me strength. Philippians 4:12-13
I love these verses! Philippians is my favorite book. A dear friend loaned me a book by Linda Dillow called "Calm My Anxious Heart" and it really wasn't as much about anxiousness as it was about contentment. The author pointed out that we can LEARN to be content. It may not come naturally or easily, but it CAN be learned! I have been thinking a lot about that lately. As I think about the writer of Philippians (Paul) and all that he went through: going from being a respected authority living in plenty to being beaten, stoned, shipwrecked, imprisoned, in danger from many people and in many places, hungry, thirsty, cold, naked, and hated (see 2 Cor. 11:23-28) I can't help but think "Wow"! I haven't been through most of what Paul went through....I can surely learn to be content as he did. How? Well, the secret of his contentment was that he could "do all things through Christ who strengthens me".
God doesn't leave me all alone to do this! He is right here with me every step of the way! That just makes my heart overflow with thankfulness. Grace and mercy in abundance.....and all of it undeserved! We serve a truly awesome God. Lord, help me to be content, thankful and to rejoice in You always!
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Nov. 3, 2007 - Keeping My Eyes on the Prize
Well, I met this morning with some fellow homeschool moms for breakfast......what a refreshing and encouraging time we had! One of the ladies (who has much wisdom to share) gave a short devotional in which she encouraged us to step back and see the big picture. In other words, to keep our eyes on the prize and persevere! Homeschooling is hard work!! A blessing, to be sure, but also very hard work! Sometimes we get so focused on the small day to day things and the problems and we forget to look at the big picture. The details are important, yes, but what are we trying to achieve? And how are we handling the many little irritants throughout the day? Are we mirroring Christ? Are we impatient? Are we gentle with our responses or carrying the hurts and responding in an unkind manner to our children?
Just yesterday, there was conflict with one of my teens. I carried that frustration all day and realized with conviction that evening that I was sinning! I needed to extend that child grace and forgiveness and move beyond the hurt and anger I felt. We talked this morning about how "love covers over a multitude of sins" 1 Peter. Oh, the truth of that! And the funny thing is, my kids and I talked about that verse this very week........of course, it was ME reminding THEM to be loving to each other. I needed the reminder that I should let my love for them cover over the multitude of their sins. The Lord knows that their mother (me!) is FAR from perfect, and I need to remember that my kids are sinners saved by grace just like me.
I thank the Lord for godly moms that encourage, inspire and gently come alongside me in this homeschool journey!
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Oct. 24, 2007 - Sufficient Grace: My first blog!
2 Corinthians 12:9
My grace is sufficient for you, for My power is made perfect in weakness.
I love this verse! It encourages me as a Christian wife, mother, and homeschooler! It tells me that I don't have to be perfect. It is the Lord's power that is perfect. It doesn't let me off the hook in striving to be more like Christ, but it does relieve me from Satan's attacks. You know the ones:
*You're not perfect, how can YOU possibly dare to encourage someone else in their Christian walk or homeschool?
*If they could only see how your kids behaved today, they'd know that you are a failure as a mom!
*You don't have YOUR act together, so you can't be a testimony to anyone else!
See what I mean? Satan tries to discourage me with all these things, but God says "Don't listen! MY grace IS sufficient, you are covered, you are precious and I WILL use you for MY glory." Thank you, Lord!
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