After some deep thought and prayer, I feel I can better explain my feelings on living a simpler life. As simple as it seems, I think what I'm looking for is only found in a deeper and closer walk with my Lord. Yes, I would love to have an old country home on rolling acres of tall grass that blows in the wind and lots of woods my sweetie can go out back and hunt in and a rolling stream we can fish in. I can see the red plaid curtains blowing in the summer breeze that are hanging from my kitchen windows above the sink. I can picture lots of things in my mind that mean "simplicity" to me but nothing compares to the joy of knowing our Lord.

So, for now, while He calls us to remain in this home, I will embark on a journey to find joy in the simple things He beckons me to do. Foremost, I am a mommy and a wife; servant to my Jesus, my husband, and my children. Maybe my eyes have been foggy from focusing too much on myself and what I want rather than what Jesus wants for me. So, while I will keep my dreams alive for that country home and the peace I believe country living could bring us, I will indeed strive to simply live in the today and walk closer to Him each moment, finding joy in each trial and each triumph!

What I am about to share I have only shared with a few close people in my life. It is something I am finaly finding victory over and though I still have a long way to go, I praise Jesus for beginning to heal this problem in my life. I have struggled my whole life with anxiety and once we had children, you can imagine how much my fears and anxieties have only grown. I worry about every little thing that could happen to them. It has caused me so much pain in my heart and distressed me so that I cannot enjoy things as I should. I avoid places like the park because I fear them falling or getting hurt. I have worried myself so silly when we should be having fun that things just aren't fun for me. Another big stressor for me are stairs. If someone invites us over who has stairs, I would rather not go. Isn't that silly! What bondage this has been for me! I think that as my Healer is helping me to gain victory in this part of my life, I am beginning to feel the chains loosen and that I can enjoy my children and their play more! If you think of it, you could pray for me in this area!

I saw a book a while back on some blogs I read and thought it would be a great book for me but I have ordered books before that greatly disappointed me and I didn't want to waste my money. So, I waited a long time until I finally felt impressed to order this one. It came in the mail the other day and I have only read a chapter or two but I am sure it is going to minister to me! I have opened up my soul to great change and am certain the Holy Spirit will teach me from what I read in this book and the thoughts and prayers it inspires. When I am done reading it, I will write a review. The book is "Passionate Housewives Desperate for God."