Mar. 28, 2009 - emotional mess
hmm.. I only have ten minutes to spill my heart out on this site, where people may or may not read it. i really dont care, i get to vent this way, and i think of it as a...i dont know how to word it.. but in a sense, a diary, only more of a spirtual one where i can look back and see how God has worked in my life.
to be more depressing, which is why i get on, is that i have no idea how i feel right now, one minute i am compleatly happy and living life up, the next im super quite (more so than normal.. which is really really quite) and i have no idea why. I'm not clincly diagonsed as bipolor or depressed, but i am a teen girl. i guess thats reason enough. but i feel like i have no one to talk to about my problems, well, i do, but i dont have any one my age. they all have back stabbed me. please don't try to say 'oh, im sure they havent, its just your emotions,' they really have, they come to me with problems and i give advice (sure, they might not ask for it, but i also ask questions, and half the time i have been in the same situation just with diff faces) and i can relate and i say what i did in that situation. and yet, i am called the drama queen. okay, i get once again i am teen girl and thats just part of life. but tell me, how is it drama when Jill (from previous blog) freaks out that her bf Jack hasn't made any form of contact in one day, when every one knows that he is in town. but yet when the guy i like (liked, ill write a diff blog bout that tomorrow,) hasn't contacted me in about two weeks, and i start freaking out after a week in a half. i just dont get where she gets that im the drama queen of the realationship...
um.. what else, oh, so because of that factor, i have decided i really am done with people. i dont care what you say, i will be the unsocliazed physco homeschooler. its kinda fun actually. sure, ill make aquentices just so i have a social life. but that will be strictly school, no where else.
ill write more tomorrow, im bout to be kicked off. till than,
-Nikki
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About Me
this blog is for more of the sad stuff in my life. No, I am not depressed, even if it seems like it. I just vent on this blog.
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