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About me.....
Oct. 26, 2007
Some days I just wonder......
| My grandmother has been with us this past week. I love her dearly. I give her all the credit for me being the person I am today. She was the one constant stable figure in my life growing up. She's in her 90's now and suffering the effects of Alzheimer's. It is heartbreaking to have her look at me and ask me who I am and if I'm related to her. It's even more heartbreaking to have to return her to my mother's house where I am not sure she gets the care she needs. Legally there is nothing I can do. I know....I've spent literally hours on the phone with various agencies. As long as there's no noticeable neglect and no noticeable abuse their hands are all tied. I'm sure that my mother loves Grandmother......in her own way. I also grew up with her though and know how twisted that love can be. Knowing that Grandmother can't say if something wrong is happening makes it even worse. So this week my children have learned a few hard lessons. .....life is about more than bookwork anyway right? They've helped take care of their great grandmother, they've asked why she doesn't tell them the stories about her life growing up that she used to, they've asked what Alzheimer's is and why she has it. They've also asked if she will die. The question I have though is "Have we really done a good thing by increasing the length of life when the quality is so low?" My grandmother was the most capable woman I have ever known. She worked all day in a cotton mill, worked a garden, and helped with their small farm all her life, and she was active in her church. In her late 70's she still worked and had farm animals. Now her day revolves around asking where the potty is every time she needs to go......never mind that its in the same place by her bed as it always is. I know the day will come soon when she will need to fed and will have no lucid moments. I don't look forward to that time. |
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