Sometimes the most difficult part of writing a post for me is figuring out what to title it, so I decided if I don't title tonight, I don't have to stay on any one subject.  I just read at a friends blog that she is moving ffrom one state to another.  Even though it is a move back to where they have lived before, I still feel for them in that it is a big undertaking.  We moved, 14 months and almost two weeks ago, can you tell I'm still telling time by the move????  We are still adjusting.  When we were in California we had stable jobs, I had been at mine for over 4 years and dh had been at his for 16.  We were highly involved at our church and had a great group of friends that we looked upon as family.  We lived in the same place for almost 11 years.  That is the only time in my life that I have lived in one place for that long, or even half that time, (in other words for more than 5 years).  I miss it still.  So does dd.  We try really hard to settle in here.  I've worked through a temp agency here which has taken me to three different companies.  What I have learned from that is that I can walk into an unfamiliar setting and do what needs to be done.  I have learned what I don't like workwise.  I have learned that I had probably the best job I could ever have before leaving CA.  I knew then that I would miss my job, just not how long I would miss it.  I've made my own job as well.  Last summer not long after arriving here, I started baking bread and selling at the farmers Markets around here.  I really enjoy that.  This year I'm tired.  I still love doing it, I just don't make very much money for the amount of work that it entails.  I have learned a LOT through this endeavor.  I won't go into all of it now.  I will be looking for some kind of job in the next week or so.  I dread this and I almost look forward to it.  As long as I'm not making a living, we are stuck here in our present condition.  I want to move on.  I want space.  I want to get all of our things out of storage and feel like we're living again, instead of feeling on hold.  We have been blessed with our situation and I'm trying hard to be content in all things.  I just didn't realize all of those things would come at once.  DH has a job, he really doesn't like it, but he is trying to do all things as unto the Lord. 

I've been feeling quite discontent as of late.  I haven't been taking care of things as well as I should.  Am I depressed???  Sometimes I think yes, then other times I think noooooo.  I see the commercials for depression medications and don't feel a need for them, although I do identify with the people represented in those commercials.  I know the feeling of not wanting to leave the house, not answer the phone, not open the mail.  But I go on.  I leave the house.  I open the mail.  I sometimes answer the phone.  I buy food.  I put gas in the car.  I do the laundry, most of the time.  Is a job the answer?  Is staying home and changing the way we live the answer?  We have changed, but are not pleased with that change.  I have been trying to live frugally.  We currently have no choice but to do that.  Well, I'm sorry I'm venting.  I wish I could be uplifing. 

I am excited for the new school year.  We have a table full of books.  I need to go through them and determine what school supplies we will need.  I hope that I can work and still give my dd the best of my attention for her schooling.  DH will be home during the day with dd while she schools.  I know other families do this, they both work and they make homeschooling work.  I did it the first year.  I did it last year.  Just not as well as I would have liked.  I hope I do better this year.  I'm tired.  I need to go to bed and sleep. 

Blessings to you all.