In John 21:16, Jesus tells Simon to "Take care of my sheep." Although I know that Jesus was actually talking about His people, I thought of that passage so often when taking care of Baab and Spot. When we would remind the boys to feed the sheep, it just always reminded us of how Jesus said to "Feed my sheep."
So it's with great sadness that I tell you that we failed. Spot died last night. We're not sure what happened, but we noticed last night before bedtime that he wasn't getting up and moving around. He was very weak, he had a temperature, and diarrhea. We did the best we could to clean him up. We gave him the medicine that we had on hand. We fed him water with the syringe to try and make sure he wasn't just dehydrated. We prayed. It wasn't enough.
That's one of the hardest parts about living on a farm actually. It's just dealing with the learning curve and just how little you actually know about caring for these precious ones that have been entrusted to you.
We've shed many, many tears this morning. It is so hard to hear Baab's lonely baa out there without Spot. Sheep are meant to be herd animals, but yet right now I can't really stand the thought of another lamb. There is just something so personal that bonds you when you bottle-feed those lambs and they follow you around the yard. Oh and the absolute joy it is to watch them run and jump in the yard. And even when they are absolutely stubborn and infuriating or sick and you don't know how to help them, all you know is how much you love them and how much you desire to see them well.
At times like this I wonder what in the world we're doing out here in the country. It brings back to mind every animal that we've lost, every plant that has died, the overwhelming amount of work to be done, our lack of a tractor, and the list goes on.
Yet this farm isn't all about us. God didn't give us this farm because we were "naturals" for farm life. There are a lot more people out there that know TONS more about growing plants and raising animals than we do. We're not worthy. We don't deserve this place.
Wow, it just reminds me not to put stock in what we do here based on our own strength, but rather to cling to Christ and His strength and mercy. He is where I'll place my hope - not in our own abilities. Just like the song says, "On Christ the Solid Rock I stand, all other ground is sinking sand."
With man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible. Mt. 19:26
For we walk by faith, not by sight. 2 Cor 5:7
Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways, acknowledge Him and will make your paths straight. Prov 3:5-6
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• Jun. 16, 2008 - Untitled Comment
Kristy