Lately, I have hurt a number of family members by my insensitive comments....It seems that because I am used to saying what is on my mind with my children, I have opened my mouth to do the same to others and it has hurt their feelings. Not that anything that I said was bad in itself, but that the timing of the comments made and the people it affected, made my comments totally insensitive and hurtful to the hearers. Now I just want to crawl under a rock and hope the people affected will forgive me. Jesus is our Rock and deliverer and only He can make things right again in situations like these.
So all night long, I have tossed and turned and asked Him to forgive me and right the situation. Why do I feel the need to speak what is on my mind? Can't I trust God to work in other people's lives and keep my eyes on my own problems? When does caring and compassion cross the line and become mean and hurtful? Who am I to think I have the right to speak into others lives what I think they need to know? Time to go back to God's word and hide myself in Him....Please Pray for me.
My Sister-in-law, Belle, is going in for another de-bulking of her trachea this morning. (They go in and basically scrape all the cancer tumors out of the opening in there) She is in desperate need of a miracle. She has not been able to swallow even her own spit for the past 2 months. We are praying that God will open up the esophagus after the trachea is debulked....that would be a miracle. She was getting her esophagus widened periodically but that obviously made her esophagus close instead. Belle has cancer of the trachea, larynx, voice box etc. and has had it for over 9 years now. She has a stomach feedingtube and cannot sleep because she cannot lie down and every 15 minutes she has to spit because she cannot swallow the spit in her mouth. She is unable to breathe through her nose and often her head feels so much pressure and pain through her neck, jaw and up to her ears. Belle has an 8 year old daughter named Rebecca and her husband is named Tom. Please keep them in prayer today and ask God to do a miracle for Belle today. You can read more about Belle in other posts I have written on my blogsite.
Guess what?! My husband is sending my oldest son and I to Israel this spring with a group from our church!! I am so excited but I am truly humbled because now I need to figure out how to come up with the funds. My son wants us to do a mission letter; but I really think of it as a pleasure, sightseeing kind of a trip and am not sure how to make the additional funds necessary. We have been trying to get out of debt this year and got rid of all our credit cards so now I have to trust that I can save the funds and not borrow. Pray for me as I try to come up with ideas. My first thought was a bake sale...so I need to plan ahead a bit and see what the next step is.
This trip has been a heart desire for me since I was 18 years old. I was all set to go to Israel with Christian Ministry for the Jews when trouble broke out in Israel and my parents would not let me go. Since then I have longed to visit Israel and have taught my children to love Israel and the Jews. In fact, we celebrate all the feasts and have celebrated Sabbath in our family since the kids were little. This past week we celebrated The Feast ofTabernacles with about 26 people from our church. It was such a blessing! I am amazed at how many Christians I have been meeting lately with a heart for Israel and who long to know more about the Jewish Roots of their faith. We live at an exciting time in the history of the church. God is doing mighty things in our midst and I am in awe of Him.
My sister in law, Belle is in desperate need of prayer tonight. She has struggled with cancer for 9 years. she has cancer of the trachea, larynx, voicebox, esophogus, etc. She had a debulking surgery done on Thursday and has not been doing very good since. She cannot speak and she cannot swallow and has been in alot of pain so is not getting sleep. She is trying to have a procedure done by the end of this week where they will expand her esophagus so she can eat food and swallow.
For Belle, getting a feeding tube would break her spirit. She definately does not want to get one but has not been doing well at all. She had one years ago and it hurt very much so she has wanted to avoid getting one. Please pray for her healing and deliverance from this tonight. She is such a wonderful witness with her life. She daily sits at her Savior's feet and being in her presence you can feel His. I know you would all love her to pieces. It is so hard to realize she is suffering like this and yet you feel so unable to help other than to pray. Again, please pray for Belle tonight.
Today, my sister-in-law, Belle, had surgery to de-bulk her throat cancer. Her airways were almost entirely blocked. Miraculously, this is the first time the doctors let her go home the same day! She is at home tonight rejoicing to be out of the hospital...but she desperately needs your prayers. She has had only 3 hours of sleep the past week and is very weepy from the anesthesia. She is also upset because she cannot swallow...but I am sure everything is just swollen up in there and will calm down later. But please pray for Jesus to heal Belle. She has suffered with this for over 8 years and she is clinging to Jesus and His word. (You can read more about Belle in my archives.)Yesterday I had my routine mamogram...It was horrendous! They kept calling me back in to re-do my left side - 8 times! The photo kept showing a pure white tissue mass that they couldn't see through so they kept adjusting the machine until they could tell whether it was the same or different from my last one. The other women in the waiting room felt sorry for me. One even said, "I feel like they are torturing you!" I felt the same way. (And today...I am black and blue!)
Finally, they said everything was O.K. and I quickly - before they changed their minds - got out of there! What did I do when I got to the parking lot? I broke down and cried. Not only because of the pain of the ordeal but because of the fear and relief of them saying everything was O.K. I went to my Heavenly Father and the following versed filled my mind:
Isaiah 26:3 "Thou wilt keep him in perfect peace whose mind is stayed. on thee; because he trusteth in thee." John 14:27 "Peace I leave with you, my peace I give unto you: not as the world giveth, give I unto you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid." Phil 4:7 "And the peace of God, which passeth all understanding, shall keep your hearts and minds through Jesus Christ.
Jesus knows everything about us and He knew I'd have to go through that yesterday and I know He was with me. He was with Belle today. We both need to trust in His peace and not let a spirit of fear overtake us. Thank you for your prayers.
It is amazing how a few months can go by so quickly when moving from one family crisis to the next. It seems that we are in a lull right now; and I am breathing a thankful sigh of relief. We have had a busy year with family members aging and needing more care, dear friends in marriage crisis and friends moving away. Please pray with me that our family will have a quiet uneventful holiday season to rest under the shadow of His wings.
My sister in law is still waiting on God to heal her of her cancer and has been waiting now for over 8 years. Her faith is amazing. I ask you to keep her in prayer too. She hopes to have another debulking done in her throat so she can swallow again. She hasn't been able to talk much since the last debulking so I have missed her voice. She had ordered a prayer shawl from a ministry that shall remain nameless and they said it would be handmade and prayed over before it was sent to you...Well, she waited for 3 months, finally got it and it was made in China. She felt so beat up by that. I don't know how that ministry can let people down like that. I told her that I would have some of my friends get together and pray over the shawl for her.
Please keep Belle in your prayers.
Gotta go and get ready for Thanksgiving tomorrow and then hit the hay.
Please pray for my sister-in-law, Belle today. At 1:00 p.m. she has an appointment with an oncologist to discuss a possible treatment for her cancer. This option has never been available before and we do not know if it will be a blanket or a cure but Belle is trusting that Jesus is in control of the situation. (Belle has cancer of the larynx, trachea, voice box and the doctors think it has spread to the lungs, stomach, kidneys and possibly the bones...but they are not sure.)
Since I last wrote to all of you, she has begun having difficulty breathing below her tracheotomy. She always has had difficulty from the trachea up but now she can feel blockage in her lungs. Since she received the doctors CAT scan in May, most people would probably have her in the grave; but Belle is not like that. Her faith is in the God who can heal and she trusts Him no matter what happens. She is in peace and although she has had days where she cries...her trust in His goodness and grace keeps her. Whenever I talk to her I can imagine Paul's conviction when he said that the Lord told him "My grace is sufficient."
Belle would ask that all of you pray for her healing and so do I.
Yesterday, eight moms gathered to pray and God was there! In fact, I am still basking in the annointing that came forth. It reminds me of Aslan in Narnia..."Aslan's on the move..." - GOD IS ON THE MOVE!!!
Since September we have been gathering almost every two weeks. The mom's pray and the kids (19 of them from age 17 down to 2) play. Awesome things have been happening. Prayer definately changes things. Homes are being put in order, marriages healed,and most of all it is igniting in us the desire to pray more. The Holy Spirit has definately been meeting with us and it carries over into our prayer closets at home. We are all from different church backgrounds but are all homeschooling moms desperate for God to intervene in our lives and draw us and our families closer to Him.
I challenge all of you today, grab a sister in the Lord and sit down and pray together and see what God can do when 'two or more gather together in His Name'. I know you will feel His presence and it will change your lives.
