Well I interviewed Jasmine, and this is what she came up with. Mind you, she had just come back from a birthday party and was on a sugar high at the time!
1. What is something Mom always says to you? Not to play with Jacob
Leaflet Academy | |
'Tis the season for some assembly required...
10:10 PM, Dec. 23, 2008
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...falalalala lalalala!That's right, Ken's under the house starting the assembly of the kids' new swing set. He is hoping to do it over two nights. Tomorrow the kids play indoors... :) We are a bit sad because the store delivered the wrong set. I mean, we've had it on layby for months. If they didn't have the right one in stock they had plenty of time to tell us. BUT they knew we wouldn't get it out until right before Christmas. So how can we take it back? Everyone else will be out of stock, and we don't want to ruin the kids' Christmas. We won't be shopping at Big W again - or at least, not for anything important. Anyway the set itself is ok. It's an improvement in some areas. I'm just upset it doesn't have a baby seat, and we chose one specifically for that reason. Also, I spent ages going through catalogues planning the perfect swingset for our kids (who've never had a swingset before in their lives) because it was fun for me to plan some fun for my kids, and in the end, the choice was made for us by some stranger. Not happy. Other than that, it looks as though Christmas is set to go at our house! We went to our church's Christmas carols night on Sunday. The speaker, a visiting missionary, was so funny even Savannah remembered his talk! And he is speaking again at the Christmas morning service, so the kids are actually looking forward to the 'sermon'! We went to visit a home who had decorated for the Christmas lights competition this year. They win every year, and with everything else going on in our lives (and the fact that Kenny works night shift) we just went to the one house. We went up and chatted with the people, they told us how they did their display, and even gave us the website address of the company they purchase from (www.santasworkshop.com.au). What was really cool, though, is that there were strong Christian themes through their display. Yeah, Santa was still there. So was a manger - and a series of lit up crosses. As in Easter crosses. There was a church as well. There were other Christian themes there as well, but those are the ones that really stood out. It is good to live in a place where someone can put a bunch of Christian symbols on display in their front yard and win first prize in the competition anyway! On that note, our local shopping center still has a nativity scene on display, and my husband is allowed to wear a Christmas shirt (not a holiday shirt) to work. I know a lot of patriotic Americans like to say that their country is the best on earth, but sometimes I feel pretty good about mine too. Well the kids are counting down the sleeps, and getting pretty zooey. Savannah is having trouble waiting, but Jaidyn isn't really sure what's going on - he was too young to remember last year. He has worked out that the candy canes hanging on our tree are yummy, he isn't allowed them yet, and that even if he sneaks one off and sticks it in his mouth, it doesn't quite work because it's wrapped in plastic, and it just annoys his sisters because it's now broken! Ah, it's a learning curve! I hope you all have a wonderful Christmas, however (and if) you choose to celebrate it - and don't forget that Jesus is the Reason for the Season! And life happens
4:50 PM, Dec. 18, 2008
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Well I took Jakie to the hospital yesterday to have his latest test. This time they wanted him to have a test in x-ray (I was told it's name, but it's so long and complicated NO-ONE could remember it) to find out the cause of his UTI - specifically to rule out reflux as a cause. I was told that reflux is the most likely cause, so I asked the docs all the questions I could think of concerning that. They made an appointment in mid-January for me to come back and talk to them about the test results.So we had the test. Jakie needed a catheter. Not fun. We got to go do the test - the gave him some dye, and then recorded him while he urinated on the x-ray table. Think of that next time you're on the x-ray table with a broken arm lol. He doesn't have reflux. He does have an irregularity in his urethra. What does that mean? I don't know. It's so vague - and I am supposed to wait a month to find out what's going on with my son. It's driving me crazy. I got sick of having to change three lots of nappies at once. My 2yo wants to be toilet trained, I just haven't because it felt wrong since the 4yo has been resisting training. So they're both in cloth training pants. I figure life is already insane here. Why not up the craziness level a notch? If they actually could get toilet trained, it would make life so much easier for me! Oh, and Jaidyn got upset when we told him he couldn't have Dora (the explorer) underpants when he is toilet trained. But he was happy when he found out he could have Bob the Builder, or Thomas the Tank Engine. They just don't make Dora undies for boys. So it seems he just wanted special underpants. He is going to find a Dora doll in his Christmas stocking. He will enjoy that. *sings* Help me if you can, I'm feeling down...
6:15 AM, Dec. 17, 2008
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Well yesterday was a mess. I can't even remember everything that happened. I'm coming down with a cold, Jakie's good with the projectile vomit, Jasmine developed a bad attitude, and Savannh and Jaidyn have decided that no boundaries apply to them.All the kids went to bed at 6.30; that's normal for my middlins (Jaidyn and Savannah) but Jasmine normally gets reading-in-bed priveliges - not when she's spent the first half of the day yawning, and the last half complaining... So Jasmine goes to sleep straight away. Jaidyn plays and gets into mischief until after 9, and Savannah is happy for the first hour or so but then starts to scream at me (I won't let her up) and continue screaming for an hour... This was supposed to be my time out, my refreshing time... Jacob was still awake so I took him to bed at 10.30 exhausted. He slept soon enough, thank God! My day started today before 6am. I KNOW I need help to get through today. Ken starts work at 11.30. The older three need to be babysat which I HATE but Jakie needs to go to the x-ray department. I can't take them in because of radiation and I'm not leaving them alone in the waiting area. Jake needs to be at paediatrics at 12.15 - for a catheter. Not fun. And Kenny won't be there with me. I'm not sure how I'll cope with that. If I can, I want to get my kids to the library at 3, they are starting their Summer Reading Program today. But you know what? I'm not going to remind Jasmine it's on today. If we miss it, then I don't want her to pull the guilt trip on me. With her attitude lately, she would. Jaidyn has been in the terrible twos, and Savannah has been copying him. I have been teaching them to say 'yes Mummy' instead of 'no'. It is working. It is a small win, but one I am pleased with. I don't know why I used to put up with the 'nos' - oh wait, society told me it was normal and to be expected. LOL! Society makes for crap parents. I knew I needed some sort of quiet time to start my day. I know this is one of the main reasons I haven't been coping so well. But I'm barely having time in my day to feed myself physically, let alone spiritually. Life is just hard at the moment. But I managed to sit down and read Psalm 27 this morning before the older three got up. It was a comfort to me. I wonder what the writer would think if he knew I was applying it to my 'enemies' - the toddlers? LOL! God is good. We will make it through today. And I'm declaring a one day school holiday. Toilet Training Blues
6:39 AM, Dec. 14, 2008
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Well we took Savannah to the doctor. I said that if Savvy is just not ready to toilet train yet then I'm fine with that. I just wanted to make sure that there is no medical reason for her problems. I talk to her after she's filled her nappy and she says that she cannot feel when she needs to go to the toilet; sometimes she doesn't notice that the nappy is full. Now, does she really not notice, or is she hiding it? I don't know. But I just wanted to make sure that she's ok.In particular I mentioned diabetes. She has been drinking a lot of water lately. A LOT. I've been trying to get her to have a drink of water before she goes to bed and then stay in bed all night, but often she will cry if I don't let her get up for another drink. I don't know if it's a medical issue or just a behavioural one - she knows she can make me let her get up if I worry enough. I do not seriously think that she has anything wrong, I just worried enough to want to make sure she's ok. I love my Savannah. I am also desperately hoping that nothing is wrong; not just because she's my precious daughter and I don't want her to have to go through that, but because I know my limits and already life has got them at breaking point! Anyway, they took a urine sample and some blood tests. Besides diabetes I'm not sure what he's looking for. Actually, Savannah was really sweet at pathology. She was happy and chirpy in the waiting room. We had Sonlight books with us :) She was happy and chirpy when we went into the room and I sat on the chair and she sat on my lap. She was looking at everything! Then they said they were going to give her a little needle. Her face turned serious and both hands went behind her back! She did, however, let them take blood. They told her to not look, but she said that she wants to look around and she watched the whole thing! She did cry a little bit, but she didn't yell and scream, and she cheered up straight afterwards, when they said they had a present for her. A little packet with a picture to colour in, two balloons, and some stickers. I bought her a little chocolate. She was actually giggling when they gave her the present! So I was very proud of my little trooper. A pretty good reaction for a four year old, hey? So yes, next Friday we are taking her back to find out the results. Hopefully (please, God!) she's fine! School update
9:47 AM, Dec. 13, 2008
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So far we are LOVING Sonlight. We are partway through the second week in some parts of it :) Basically, we started with read alouds and history. Then we added in reading, bible, and Wordly Wise. Last night we started spelling, and today I hope we will start more of the language arts.I hate being all over the place, but thankfully SL's IG makes it very easy to know exactly where we are. It has been great to gradually get used to it, and a real blessing to not panic about not finishing a day's work when we have to up and take Jake to the hospital because he's pulled out his nasal-gastric tube again. We are probably going to go a little faster in both the read alouds and the readers. This doesn't bother me since when we finish the read alouds I'm going to do some Aussie stories. And I knew the readers would be easy for Jasmine, since I was ordering for her Language Arts level, not her reading level, which is way ahead of her grade level. So we will just have to hit the library for that. As it is, we are about to finish the first Read Aloud book today (The Boxcar Children) and I'm going to the library to get two more books from the series out for Jasmine to read to herself. So maybe that will slow her down a little. Jasmine worked out that today is a 'holiday' (it's Saturday, and it's the first day of school holidays here). I have explained to her that we will work every day that we can, and we will take a break every day that we need to. I will not take every Saturday off; especially when we may end up spending too much time on the next Wednesday at the hospital to get much schoolwork done! If she gets too stressed, we will take a break. But while things are good, we will work. I mean, we spend less than two hours every day doing school work, so it's no big deal. I also told her that if today is a holiday in this house, then we will not finish the boxcar children today, and I will not go to the library for her today. :) And yes, I will ensure that Sundays are a 'day off', and that she has Sunday afternoon to herself. Do you know, from Sunday to Wednesday this week we were at a hospital or doctor's office every single day??? Well, Jake and I were; Ken and the kids didn't go on every trip. So this is why we're doing the work while we can philosophy - I never have any warning now as to when things will get pearshaped. We are doing a good job of taking a bag of SL books with us whenever we are heading out to a medical appointment. That's when much of the preschool stuff gets done :) I've heard of homeschooling, I've heard of carschooling. I think we are doing hospital-schooling, waiting-room-schooling, or on-the-run-schooling! Oh yes: I have discovered that the refrigerator makes an excellent white board. If you accidentally use a permanent marker, you can use metho to wipe it off. Just be careful your 2 year old doesn't suddenly get the idea to use the bathroom door as a colouring book... :D Playing Catchup
7:21 AM, Dec. 13, 2008
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Well I haven't blogged in a while. Right now, life is traveling at break-neck speed. So the idea of actually getting caught up on here is actually overwhelming! I can't actually remember what I last blogged about, so this will be just a quick update - it'll probably still be long though!So Wednesday a week and a half ago, we worked out Jacob had a urinary tract infection, and he was put on antibiotics. Sunday night we ended up back at the hospital; Jake had diarrhoea, and the paediatrics ward told us to bring him up. So when we get to the hospital, he vomits and then is inconsolable. The doctors bring us straight in, we don't even make it to the second triage desk. Jake refuses his normal feed, and they decide to do blood tests and stuff to find out what's going on with him. I'm given the impression that there could be something really wrong with Jake. I'm torn between being really worried for my boy, and really worried that we won't make it to the city the next day - we're supposed to see the city doctors on Tuesday, and I haven't packed yet! While waiting at the hospital, I was very thankful for Jasmine's Sonlight books :) I pre-read two and a half of them that night, and enjoyed them thoroughly. I also had a bit of an interesting thought. Since moving to our current town, and subsequently our new church, I have been in contact with some really strong, mature christians. I haven't seen that many in the past before. Suddenly I felt very immature and childish. About a year ago I asked God to grow me, and do something with me. Well, this year is going to grow me. Jacob is the answer to prayer in more ways than one (Jasmine originally prayed for Jacob when I was using a diaphragm. I put a stop to it when she started praying for twins, however ;) ). God doesn't always answer our prayers how we want him to - but we won't grow with a wave of a magical wand. We grow through circumstances. Oh yes, at one time I remembered that I hadn't told the doctor that Jacob's sleep apnoea machine went off on Friday night. Did I blog about that? Probably not... that weekend was nuts! So anyway, I told the nurse, 'Jacob has Pierre Robin syndrome, so it is possible that when he lies on his back his tongue will flop back and obstruct his airways. We have a movement monitor on him in his cot to give us warning, it goes off if he doesn't even move to breathe for 20 seconds. It went off on Friday night, but as soon as I moved him back on to his front, he took a deep gasp for breath and was fine.' The nurse asked me a few more questions, looked at Jake lying on the bed (on his back) and very gently, moved him on to his front. The doctor turned up and she told him what I'd just said. He shrugged his shoulders and said, 'Oh yes, it happens', and walked off. By ten pm it is determined that there is nothing major wrong with Jacob, and the diarrhoea is probably caused by his antibiotics. Which I DID tell them about at the beginning... I get home at about 10.30. I hadn't even had tea yet, I'd been a bundle of stress all night, and now I get to pack so I can be on a plane at 10.15 the next morning. I pack and get to bed at 1am. The next morning we dropped the kids off at a friend's house, because Jasmine hates the airport. Or, she hates saying goodbye at the airport. Then Ken took me and Jake to the airport. Yikes, playing catchup is hard work. I'll finish this later. Update
11:51 PM, Dec. 6, 2008
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Well I haven't posted in a couple of days. And I think I didn't post much the last time I posted. So...Jacob now has a urinary tract infection. He is on antibiotics. He has an ultrasound scheduled next Thursday morning to check that his kidneys aren't scarred. When they first diagnosed him, they wanted confirmation before they put him through the sorts of tests he would be facing, so Ken and I got to stay up until 3.30am one morning and get him - a 5 week old baby - to pee in a cup. That was fun. Not. 5 week old babies without their nappy on poop. You learn something new every day :) Oh, and on Monday I am flying with Jake to the city. I will stay with my bil and sil one night, go to the hospital with Jake on Tuesday, and then fly back. Maybe soon I will actually know a little more about his condition. And just for fun, last night his sleep apnoea machine decided to go off. He took a deep breath as soon as I adjusted his position. I don't know if we will ever know if he actually stopped breathing, but the machine hasn't done that before and we knew it was a risk so maybe he did. If so thank God for saving our boy! It is very scary to wake up to an alarm (that is not a simple sleep alarm) going off. Of course, we have more than one child in our family. If you are reading this blog right now you could probably miss that :) I have started Sonlight with Jasmine. Right now we are just doing Read Alouds and History. We are still doing her old Math and Science. She doesn't like the History right now, but we've only started, and she still does love the map and timeline activities, so she does look forward to it for that reason. She loves the read alouds and wants to read ahead. She wants to do the quiet reading too. She is reading a LOT at bed each night just because she can. Tonight she took a children's bible story book to bed. That was her choice. It made me feel proud though. Jasmine has also matured a lot lately. She has been a huge help to me. When I am tube-feeding Jakie, and cannot leave for another five minutes, and Jaidyn wants a drink or a nappy change, she will get it or do it for me. Without complaining. I am so proud of my little helper. I would like to take her out for a Mummy-Daughter date soon, just because she is so grown up. She is a wonderful girl, I can't say enough nice things about her. A little while ago she would argue with us over anything, once she worked out that wasn't on she just changed overnight. She's really growing up. She has her own bedroom now, and has the unique 'oldest child' privelege of reading once she's in bed. She values that privelege :) Savannah enjoys her Sonlight books too. She loves the Eloise Wilkins stories. I have started reading the kids a story from one of the bible story books each night when they are eating tea, and they all love it. She cried a bit because she can't read the stories by herself yet so I felt a bit guilty and we resumed her reading lessons. Well, what can I say? Life is hectic here at the moment. She likes the time at Mummy's computer and having Mum's attention to herself. Today I printed out all the readers that she is up to so far and we put them into a special folder (just a plastic document folder) for her. It is currently a prized posession. It went to bed with her. I have noticed that I tend to group Savannah and Jaidyn in together. I call them my 'middlins'. They tend to be at a similar maturity level and enjoy similar games. They also intend to both be involved in a high number of the arguments that go around here... both Savannah and Jaidyn are more active and tomboyish than Jasmine is. Well, Jaidyn is a boy but you know what I mean :) But I noticed today that despite their age differences, all three of them, at times, play together very well. There are only four years' difference between Jasmine and Jaidyn, but seeing as Jaidyn is only two, that means a huge developmental gap. But they try and accommodate for that in their games. They are lovely kids. Jaidyn is still loving his little brother. He would literally smother the little guy with kisses if we let him. We had so many people tell us that jealousy would rear it's ugly head - despite the fact that we'd had a baby when our youngest was 2 twice before - and there's just been absolutely no malice there. Jaidyn said a new phrase today: 'tube feed'. He likes drawing, climbing on everything, and giving Mum mild heart attacks. He is a cuddly, tender, little boy, while still loving playing rough games and playing with cars etc. He has no problems playing with his sisters, because he really knows no other life. I am glad he has a brother too, though. I love my children. All of my children. There are times that we go through when it becomes obvious that we have not done a good job of training one or another of them, and life is a bit more difficult here for a bit. But thank God we can get through those times and really, genuinely enjoy our kids. They are certainly handfuls - but they are heartfuls too. I read an opinion column in my local paper tonight, where the columnist was saying how horrid it was that kids had twelve weeks of holidays a year, that she and her husband cannot get leave to watch them for all twelve, and she can't possibly entertain her kids for more than two or three weeks by herself without pulling her hair out. I think it's sad that her kids have never learned to entertain themselves (Jasmine could teach them a great game of 'block chess', using lego pieces...) and that her relationship with her kids is so poor that she admits to eagerly awaiting the end of school holidays. I also think it's sad that she thinks her feelings are so normal that she writes them, openly, in the newspaper, with her name attached, and that she says that she loves her children. I could tell her a thing or two about love. I can also tell her that my children are indispensible in our day-to-day living. They are valuable and worthwhile and oh - such joys! I wish she could have such a joy in her heart, and her home. A Jaidyn funny
7:32 PM, Dec. 4, 2008
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Because Jacob has a cleft palate and I cannot breastfeed him, I pump so that I can at least give him my expressed milk. The children have seen me pump many times. It actually makes me sad that they are learning that this is the normal way babies feed... but that's another story.So the other day I heard the expressing machine on and went to investigate it. Jaidyn had taken one of the expressing cups, hooked it up to the machine correctly, attached it to his belly button and turned the machine on! Being only two, he assumed he'd done a very clever thing, and was quite happy to pose for me. Great 21st fodder, I think!  Muahahahahahaha!!!!! *cough cough*
Yet more Jakie medical dramas
7:22 PM, Dec. 4, 2008
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It looks as though Jake might have a urine infection. If he does he'll have more medical tests this year. Fun stuff - not.I know normally I would post the big long story about this, but I'm just too tired and spent. Try sitting up till 3.30am trying to get a five week old baby to pee in a cup and you'll see how I feel. (And yes, we succeeded - twice!) Anyway we get his test results back tomorrow. I HOPE they are good. It is possible that the original urine test was contaminated, which is why they wanted another couple of samples. (And they didn't want them from a urine bag because they are more likely to get contaminated that way, and that's how they got the first sample.) They don't want to put him through all the tests if it's not necessary. JACOB ROLLED OVER!!!
6:17 AM, Dec. 1, 2008
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So I put him on his sheepskin rug next to me on his back, and he was wriggling around, almost wriggling off the mat, and then he rolled over right on to his front! He's only five weeks old!This is what babycenter.com says about rolling over: "Your baby may be able to kick himself over, from his tummy to his back, as early as age 2 to 3 months. It may take him until he's about 5 or 6 months to flip from back to front, though, because he needs stronger neck and arm muscles for that maneuver." So he shouldn't have been able to do his back to front flip for quite some time yet! I know it sounds like I'm bragging for him. But you see, when Jacob was first born I (perhaps foolishly) signed up for weekly milestones emails. You know, the ones that tell you what you might expect that week? So I got one early last week that said that I could expect Jacob to start babbling any time soon. And I thought - probably not. Try and say 'dadada' without your tongue reaching the roof of your mouth. Jacob doesn't have a roof of his mouth! Yes, his cleft is pretty severe. Also the shape of his mouth is very different, even sounds that don't require the tongue touching the roof of your mouth probably require a certain mouth shape, and Jacob has a gaping hole that leads to his nasal cavity, so it would all be different for him. So I'm not expecting babbling any time soon. And so it made me sad to get that email. I wouldn't have looked for babbling so soon if I hadn't gotten that email. So I talked to Ken and wondered if I should just cancel the emails? And like always with Jacob, just when I feel a bit sad, he turns around and surprises me. We may have to wait a little longer to hear that 'mamma' or 'dadda', but he's still a clever boy, and he's learning new tricks all the time. I don't think it will be too long before he's toddling around after his little brother. Mind you, I don't think I'd mind if he was stationary for a little longer... Happy Anniversary to us!
6:04 AM, Dec. 1, 2008
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Well, today Ken and I have been married for 7 years! That is a long time! And our family has changed so much in that time!After we were first married, we lived in a tiny two bedroom unit. Jasmine was a surprise baby who was born in that first year. I had always wanted to be a mother, but Ken was quite young, and had never had much time around babies. That was a big learning curve year for both of us! And here we are, parents to four children! Once, Ken would have never believed it - he has changed so much over the years! He is a wonderful husband and father, and he enjoys playing games with and teasing the kids. Way back when we were first married, if you had suggested homeschooling and a 'large' family to Ken, he would have probably run in the other direction! Yet he was part of our decision making, and is behind me all the way. He now doesn't like traditional schooling any more than I do. (Not that he ever liked it, he was bullied quite badly himself, but he still originally believed that it was essential). Right now my darling husband is starting our anniversary day tradition - putting up the Christmas tree. Since we were married on December 1, it just kind of made sense! We are going to go shopping for some Christmas decorations today. Thank you God for my amazing husband. Thank you for helping us to weather the storms that have come our way so far. Please help us as we face the next year together. Please protect us, our marriage, and our family. Thank you for the four beautiful blessings that you have given us, and please give us wisdom as they grow. We love you. Amen. My kids
5:36 AM, Nov. 30, 2008
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Yesterday I heard Jaidyn squealing from another room. He's in the twos at the moment, and usually this just means that someone else has a toy that he wants. Since I was expressing at the time, I called for him to come to me. He didn't come.So I called again. This time Savannah came, quite concerned, to tell me that Jaidyn couldn't come because he was stuck. So I went to find him. He was stuck in the middle of climbing up the bathroom sink, he'd been playing with toothpaste, which he isn't allowed to do. Obviously. So I said to him, 'Are you supposed to be up there?' He replied, 'Ummm... yes???' ------------- Jasmine loves making activity books for the people in her life. Recently she came and asked me for some details for one she was making for me. She asked me how old I was. I said, '29'. She got distracted with something else, and then said, a few minutes later, 'Was that 38, mum?' -------------- In my family we often teasingly refer to the children as ratbags. I also make a habit of saying that we love ratbags in our family. A few days ago Jaidyn was stroking his sleeping brother gently, and said, 'Jakie, ratbag. Yeah.' How cute! ------------- We're missing church this morning because my three older kids have had a vomiting bug. I think we're mostly over it, but I want to make sure my kids get some rest. Plus Jasmine just got sick yesterday, so I'm not sure we're out of it yet. From the look of Jaidyn's current antics (upside down halfway off the couch) I'd say that some at least are starting to feel better! Here's hoping next week goes better! Jaidyn's first crush!
8:11 AM, Nov. 28, 2008
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Goodness! I'm feeling old! There is this one girl who Jaidyn considers to be rather special. Her name is never far from his lips. When we go shopping, he sees her face everywhere. And - shock horror - she's an older woman!Who is this little minx who has gotten my two year old so infatuated? Dora the Explorer. Now, how do you explain to a two year old that they cannot have Dora the Explorer underpants when they are toilet trained? And no, Diego is not a suitable substitute! Ooh Ooh Ooh!
7:47 AM, Nov. 28, 2008
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I forgot to tell you about a HUGE milestone we reached yesterday!Yesterday, for the first time ever, I posted away our yearly home education report! I still have to send away our plan for what we will be doing next year, but I have until the end of January to do that. I had originally planned to send them both at the same time, but life here is so hectic right now, and I have every reason to believe life will be easier in January. Plus this way I can do my plan over time. AND I can do it with my sonlight IG right in front of me. So this will probably work better. I have no idea what they will think of my report, but I'm not too sure I care. From what I've heard, home education registration in Queensland is more of a formality than an actual attempt to regulate who home educates. For now, anyway. And if they find it is insufficient, I can appeal. So there. But yeah. I now feel that I am a seasoned homeschooler. We have survived our first regulated year. W00t! A better day
9:55 PM, Nov. 27, 2008
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Well today was a busy day and I didn't get most of the things I wanted to done. But I contacted the Australian Breastfeeding Association yesterday and got some support for my problems with pumping for Jacob, so I feel more positive with that (and less ouchy!)Anyway, I need to go to bed because Jake's just finished his 10pm feed and I need to get up for the next one at 1. I just wanted to post for ONCE when I'm feeling positive, so this blog doesn't turn into one big emotional train wreck! Have a good night everyone! Depressed about expressing
9:00 PM, Nov. 26, 2008
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Well tonight I am thoroughly depressed.There are probably a few good reasons for this. I have a four week old baby, so hormones are probably rife. I have been awake since 5.30 this morning. I have had a sick four year old to care for since the middle of last night. And of course Jacob takes a bit of effort to care for too. So right now I feel like throwing in the towel, but I daresay that I'll feel differently tomorrow. That doesn't make it much easier to cope now. So I'm having troubles expressing. I'm not able to express as much as I should; I'm exhausted, Jake feeds every three hours and he takes between 45 mins and an hour. If I expressed after every feed like I should... well, for starters I'd just be running on no sleep whatsoever. My heart is breaking because I was able to breastfeed all my other babies until at least 11 months. I want to at least be able to breastfeed Jakie until his surgery at nine months, but right now I just don't think I can last the week. There is some hope that when we go to the city in two weeks he might be able to get an artificial palate, and he won't be taking so long to feed anymore, but we don't even know he'll get that, and even if he does his jaw may cause him to be unable to breastfeed. Oh yes, and poor Savannah has been sick today. A lot. So I've had to deal with that too. She's lying on the couch right now, tucked up for the night. Gingie, our kitten, is lying on her blanket keeping her company. She's a beautiful little girl. Savannah, not Gingie... So yeah. There is so much about motherhood I still have to learn, I fall so far short of my hopes and dreams. I mean, I'm talking about discipline, routines, discipleship - the hard stuff. But here I am - I can't even feed my baby! How much of a failure can you possibly get? 
It's on its way!
5:25 PM, Nov. 26, 2008
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Thanks to the online tracker, I now know that my Sonlight curriculum is currently sleeping at a fedex facility in Colorado, and it should arrive next Tuesday! How cool is that?*Sigh* I feel as though I'm a little kid again and Christmas is just around the corner! Frustration
1:12 PM, Nov. 26, 2008
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Now, the Australian Breastfeeding Association has done a lot to improve acceptance of breastfeeding. While I would always strive to be modest, I do think my infants have a right to feed, and that that is not being dirty or inappropriate.However, where is the acceptance for women who are expressing for their infants who cannot breastfeed? I am starting to realise that if I am serious about continuing to 'breastfeed' my son, I will have to spend a lot more time at home. I'm not sure what I think of that yet. However, I HAVE to take Jacob by plane to another city and possibly spend all day at the hospital there in order to see a doctor. Now, even if I have enough stocked milk to feed him for that period of time, I will have to continue to express in order to keep my supply up. And my pain down... How on earth am I going to manage this??? I've already worked out I will have to buy or borrow a hand pump because I can't possibly pack the electric one the hospital has loaned me... Poor Savannah... and other stuff
9:38 AM, Nov. 26, 2008
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Poor Savannah is feeling sick today. Actually, that's not quite accurate. She seems to be feeling fine, but she's been sick anyway. Poor darling. It isn't nice being sick.In other news, I received an email today that Sonlight has shipped our order! And I even have a tracking link! Excellent! Now you know how I'll be wasting my time over the next week or so! LOL! Jacob has been much more unsettled lately. He isn't awake and happy to be looking around or whatever, he is awake and wanting attention. This is quite full on. Oh well, we'll get through it. I've said from the beginning that the first year of Jakie's life will be the hardest, and from there it will get easier. Well, we've gotten through the first month. So that's only 11/12 to go! He's a lovely little boy, and I'm not sure where the time has gone (probably in a sleepy haze, lol!) We (Jacob and I) have our first trip to the city hospital in about two weeks. I am very nervous. I do not know what to expect. I don't know how long it will take. And I'm not very good at talking with doctors... yet... I will get used to it over time I am sure! But right now I am nervous. I don't know what will happen at the appointment, and I don't know how long it will take, and I don't know what outcome (if any) will come of it. The doctors here have suggested we might get an artificial palate out of it, but that's up to the doctor in the city. I am desperate for this, it would make life almost normal... but I may just be disappointed. And if we did get it, what would the timeframe be? Would it be done in the city or by orthodontists in my own town? Would it mean more trips to the city, or a longer appointment while we are there? WHEN WOULD WE GET IT???? And... would I be able to breastfeed if we do get it? And - what will Jacob think of his first airplane trip? How will I go travelling by myself with an infant with special feeding needs? Stolen Tag
7:03 PM, Nov. 24, 2008
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2. What makes Mom happy? When I give her a flower 3. What makes Mom sad? When I disobey her
4. How does Mom make you laugh? Saying funny jokes
5. What was Mom like as a child? I don't know
6. When is Mom's birthday? I don't know that either
7. How tall is Mom? I can't weigh! (Woops, we'll have to study measurements, lol)
8. What is Mom's favorite thing to do? play computer games (*blush*)
9. What does Mom do when you're not around? look after Jacob 10. If your Mom becomes famous, what will it be for? I don't know (I don't think she understood the concept of being famous, since I don't by glossy mags, lol)
11. What is Mom really good at? cuddling
12. What is Mom not very good at? I don't know 13. What does Mom do for a job? Work for us. Every Day. 14. What is Mom's favorite food? Apples
15. What makes you happy about Mom? That she's nice and cuddly 16. If Mom were a cartoon character, who would she be? A beautiful princess
17. What do you and Mom do together? cuddle each other
18. How are you and Mom alike? We have similar hair 19. How are you and Mom different? I don't know 20. How do you know Mommy loves you? That she kisses me and hugs me
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