Feb. 17, 2006 - How do Two Creatives Live Happily Forever Together?
All last week I was stuck in a funk and I came across a great homeschool article that helped me put into words what I knew my heart was struggling with.
I am an artist. I am a self-taught graphic designer, recently finished an interior design program and have begun teaching art classes to homeschool children. Sounds like a full and fulfilling life!
Then why the funk?
I kept roaming around the house harboring bitterness that I knew needed to be released. I cried out in my heart, "Lord, what's up with this???!!!!" What's up with ME!!!????". It was my creative self getting ugly. I was upset that I was locked into loads of laundry, digging in to dirty dishes, sweeping swarming dust bunnies, korralling kranky kids.....where was my time? Where was my opportunity to do what I WANTED TO DO??!!! I found myself feeling resentful towards my husband everytime he left to go to another band practice, to sit down and work on songs, to make another lesson. This wasn't what I signed up for!!!
Or was it?
God prepared me to live this life. God raised me in a family where creative people thrived, where everyone around me was either sketching and drawing, playing drums, rattling the rafters with full stack Marshalls, running out the door to set up another live show downtown.....
Later in life I chose an excessive lifestyle living downtown as a punk rock girl, living paycheck to paycheck, using my money to indulge in the local bars and bands....all of this before I became saved. Now what does God do with a girl like me and a history like that? He gives me a godly man who leads my family and lives to make an impact in the Atlanta music scene with his guitar!
I have been blessed with a family like no other, in a life that enables me to support my husband, school my children, AND be creative in between house chores...God has been and is weaving together such a life quilt using me, my husband and our children in the creative community of Atlanta. HOW GOOD THAT IS.
The article I read was called "Keeper of A Mother's Dreams" (http://crosswalk.com/family/home_school/1375423.html) and this last week has reminded me that, while I had lots of ideas and dreams for myself, God has bigger dreams for me and who can argue with that? He knows my heart, knows my desires, knows me better than I know myself!!! I am trusting in Him to lead me through my husband in a life that is bigger and better than I could ever dream up. Two creative people living happily ever after together!!
Comments
Feb. 17, 2006 - Thanks for the article!
Posted by TammyC
Your blog entry is wonderful and the article you link to is excellent. Thanks for taking the time to share!
Celebrating Jesus!
Tammy C
Feb. 17, 2006 - love your blog
Posted by debdillon
Welcome to HSB! I hope you write often, I would love to hear more about your adventures in homeschooling and teaching art.
Deb
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