I got a comment on my last post from 2boysmom about limiting my son's time w/that particular cousin. And I gotta tell you, I couldn't agree more!. His time has been limited for quite a while now.
We began limiting his time w/this particular cousin with the very first signs of growing pains, that's why I noted the little comments my SIL was saying back in 5th grade. She thought some of it was cute, and other things she just thought was part of being a boy. Well, I beg to differ. I will not just sit by idly while my son just does whatever, and dismiss it as "oh its just part of growing up" or "man, I can't believe it's time for this already". Those are the types of comments she makes about his behavior, as if she has to adjust her life according to his whims and fancy's because it's just *time* for that particular behavior to start. From the very beginning, I saw her take on that mentality, and I knew that there would be major changes in her son because of it. That's when I began to warn my son, with the old mother's cry, "you just watch the changes that you'll see in that boy when he hits middle school", and now he admittedly sees them. It's very sad, but we are glad that we made the decision when we did to lessen the time that those two spent together (only a few times/year for the last couple of years).
I hate that we have to be that way with family, but I do believe that's why Jesus was so clear on *who* exactly the word "family" included. So that we wouldn't feel so obligated to be around certain people, simply because we share the same blood. Sometimes, it seems that we can get so wrapped up in, "but they're family", instead of truly realizing the effects that being around them may have on our/our child(ren)'s spirituality, that we end up cuttting off our nose to spite our face, know what I mean?
While He was still talking to the multitudes, behold, His mother and brothers stood outside, seeking to speak with Him. Then one said to Him, “Look, Your mother and Your brothers are standing outside, seeking to speak with You.” But He answered and said to the one who told Him, “Who is My mother and who are My brothers?” And He stretched out His hand toward His disciples and said, “Here are My mother and My brothers! For whoever does the will of My Father in heaven is My brother and sister and mother.”
Matt.12:46-50
"If anyone comes to Me, and does not hate his own father and mother and wife and children and brothers and sisters, yes, and even his own life, he cannot be My disciple. Whoever does not carry his own cross and come after Me cannot be My disciple."
Luke 14:26-27
"Do you suppose that I came to grant peace on earth? I tell you, no, but rather division; for from now on five members in one household will be divided, three against two and two against three. They will be divided, father against son and son against father, mother against daughter and daughter against mother, mother-in-law against daughter-in-law and daughter-in-law against mother-in-law."
Luke 12:49-53
***Of course, we convince ourselves that we are having compassion, or are "witnessing" to them (I mean, how will they ever get saved w/o us ). But fortunately, Jesus was quite clear on how we handle that as well. And it was not from spending unlimited amounts of time w/them. If we don't monitor time spent with non believers, even if they're family, someone will begin to change. And if its not them, then guess who?***
Also He said to them, “In whatever place you enter a house, stay there till you depart from that place. And whoever will not receive you nor hear you, when you depart from there, shake off the dust under your feet as a testimony against them." Mark 6:10
NOTE: all scripture emphasis (bold/underline/italics) added by me
I'm a wannabe in every sense of the word. I wanna be good enough to make it to heaven, but Jesus died because I will never be. I wanna be a mom of ten living on a farm in the middle of nowhere, training my girls to honor God & their husbands, by being content, happy homemakers...yet God has seen fit to bless us with the opportunity to help rear for Him two boys (22 and 12), in the middle of suburbia ;) I wanna be a helpmate to my husband in every way possible, yet more often than not, I'm in his way, lol. I wanna be the perfect parent, that raises perfect children, yet I am constantly humbled by the fact that only He is perfect, and I must allow him to lead. I wanna be the ultimate caretaker of my temple, and the pinnacle of health to all around me, yet no amount of healthy eating/exercise keeps me from dropping to my knees often, in need of healing from the Great Physician. I could go on and on about the the things that I am trying to be, but I invite you instead to come and join me as I travel on my path toward virtue... ~Proverbs 31:10-31~
). But fortunately, Jesus was quite clear on how we handle that as well. And it was not from spending unlimited amounts of time w/them. If we don't monitor time spent with non believers, even if they're family, someone will begin to change. And if its not them, then guess who?*** 
