I had the most amazing conversation tonight with her. She will be 7 in November. And this yr, these past 4 months or so, have been very hard for me w/her. She has been defiant, angry, very difficult at times. And yet, there are other times of sweetness and joy and cuddling. I have been praying a lot lately, asking God for wisdom, reminding myself that He has her in His hands, asking Him to move in her little heart.

Tonight, she was reading her bible before bed - usually she reads, and then reads to me and we talk a bit. She came racing in to me and told me God had led her to psalm 100 and 118. So I went in to her room, she read both to me, and then I asked her what spoke to her in those, what she liked, etc. And it took a while for her to put it in to words, but she basically said that it encourages her when she disobeys, it helps her to not be angry at herself. And then she said that the passages about singing for joy, gladness, praising all made her feel "like the moments after I tell you I did something wrong - like my heart is bursting with joy."

Isn't that a lovely idea/description? We are so burdened w/our sin, and then we confess, and there is a lightness, a joy, a fullness in Christ.

And then, after a lot of talking, she told me she still felt like God was calling her to be a missionary nurse. We pray for a missionary in Asia tha tis imprisoned; we have talked about why. And she said, "Mom, God is calling me to do that. And if I get put in to prision for talking about Jesus, then I will be strong and courageous"

well, I have never thought, as a mother, about the true implications of a missionary daughter. It was exciting, scary, wonderful, horrible all at the same time. I did not grow up in a Christian home , so a lot of this is foreign to me. But if that is what the Lord is calling her to do, then blessings and prayers and love and joy will accompany her!

This is a hard road, raising children, needing constant wisdom and strength and His grace. But it is a wonderful place to be!

Thanks for listening :)